Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences 
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- Fear not! My first boyfriend in high school had significantly thinning hair at 17, and one of the most popular, genuinely well-liked and crushed-upon guys at my college was seriously balding (already at crown, hairline racing to meet it). I honestly don't care about hairline when it comes to attraction, and going by other girls' reactions to these young men, they don't, either. Personality and charm will get you a lot more attention than a full head of hair.
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Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,While I don't have the global perspective on this that S. Gentry does, I can say that behavior like this among young African-Americans ABOUNDED at 'Freaknik' in Atlanta, GA throughout the mid-1990's. Originally organized to be a picnic/festival for historically black southern colleges, the annual week-long event quickly became such an outlet for debauchery (I've seen home videos)that Atlanta won't host it and it is now defunct. I'm not judging, a good time certainly appeared to be had by all, I'm just giving the first non-white (the group targeted in the original posting) example that came to mind to give a little more perspective.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,I'm not sure if this will help, but around Boston members of the Nation of Islam sell bean pies (like a fruit pie, only filled with baked beans) on corners and at traffic lights. They also hand out literature, though not always at the same time. I've always thought the pies were a fundraising effort(although I could definitely be wrong here).User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,Although I'm not Jewish, I'm reasonably sure that this is because fish are not mammals, that is, they do not breast feed. The restriction on the combination of meat and dairy is because an animal can't be cooked in the milk of its mother.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,I'm a little surprised that Y? Forum would post such an inflammatory message, but I presume it was to play Devil's Advocate and spark a little INTELLECTUAL discussion of the subject. I think Sean's perspective stems in large part from his own ethnicity (I'm only guessing he is Irish) and where he lives. Boston has large Irish and Italian communities, and as both groups came to the area at roughly the same time, and experienced many of the same social problems (inability to get work, ill-conceived stereotypes), they tended to lash out at each other in the fight to establish themselves and be recognized as more than second-class citizens. It is just human nature to want to feel like you aren't the 'lowest man on the totem pole.' That is where I feel the perceived hatred of blacks comes in as well. Unfortunately, until the influx of Eastern European emigres, there was no one else for these groups to feel better than than American blacks. I do not, however, feel that this continues to be as great a problem as it has been in the past. At the risk of sounding idealistic, I am half Irish and half Italian and have a black boyfriend. While neither of my sets of grandparents were very happy at first about my parents' marroage (everything is fine now) and I'm fairly sure that my Italian grandfather (who has passed away) would have had some issues with my relationship, I think things are coming together for the people in this country who are open-minded enough to let them. Of course, there will always be those who fight progress and change with every fiber of their being; but the important thing is to not let ignorance pervade yourself, and to try to fight it in those around you when you have the strength or opportunity.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,I had heard that this originated in the drug trade as code that the wearer had something to sell. However, when I asked a black friend if it were true or if there was another reason, he said that the rumor was unsubstantiated and that regardless of the origin it is now just a fashionable thing to do.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,This relates a little to what Amanda from Boston said: I was actally going to use Irish- and Italian-Americans as examples of pride. Do the hyphens come from the enthusiasm of these groups for their heritage, or vice-versa? I don't know, but I do know that of all my friends, those who are the 'Boston Combo,' (a phrase we coined for 1/2 Irish, 1/2 Italian) identify very strongly with their ancestry, whether they are one or four generations removed from the motherland. I can't say this about my friends who are of Polish, German, French, etc. descent.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,We discussed this extensively in my James Baldwin seminar and came to the conclusion that frequent use and adoption of a hurtful/hateful term such as 'nigger' or 'bitch' reduces the impact over time. Over time, there is less stigma and less pain attached. I think there is an appropriate time and place for such language, though. A brother around the way has every right to say it whenever he pleases among friends, but I agree that it is not appropriate for a professional environment. Furthermore, casual use of the term will never be socially acceptable coming from someone other than a black person, no matter how 'down' they may perceive themself as being.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,Writer and civil rights activist James Baldwin wrote several essays, short stories and even novels dealing with this subject. Two to start with are his essay 'A Stranger in the Village,' included in the anthology 'The Price of the Ticket,' and his short story 'This Morning, This Evening, So Soon,' from the collection 'Going to Meet the Man.' I think you'll find that even his fictionalized accounts will give you insight into some issues you could end up dealing with.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,I can't attest to the frequency of sex among older people, but I know that for women at least there are biological changes that affect sexuality. Due to lower levels of estrogen after menopause, vaginal tissues thin and become less supple - sort of like tissue paper but not as fragile. This makes sexual activity very uncomfortable. Estrogen replacement therapy can help with this problem (hopefully by the time you hit 70 or 80, it will be safer and more widely used).User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,I am in a very similar situation. I find that my boyfriend's male friends are very accepting; but of the 20 or so black women he associates with on a daily basis, about half have been openly hostile, and less than five have been minimally friendly. One of my best friends is an African girl, and she is very supportive of my relationship. I wonder if this is partly because she doesn't share the American slave history, in addition to being an intelligent and open-minded, individual. There is some very interesting, if disturbing, discussion of this subject in Spike Lee's Jungle Fever.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,I've been dating a black man for almost a year, and we are becoming quite serious. My parents have great concern with this, not because they have a problem with black people, but because they are afraid I might be socially stigmatized by my relationship with him. For example, they say some white boys may not want to date me. I don't need ignorant individuals like that in my life, anyway. Or they ask me how I will feel about the looks I get pushing a dark baby through our suburban mall. Like Joan, I'm looking for a few words of support and wisdom, but I could really use some advice on how to ease my parents' fears. How well-founded are they?User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,Many of my guy friends who do that wear designer underwear. These have 'Calvin Klein,'POLO SPORT,' 'Tommy Hilfiger' or any number of other designer names or lines printed on the waistbands. In these situations, I believe it's partly a status thing. I have a question as well: Don't all those high school girls know how trashy it looks to have their bra straps so blatantly exposed when paired with a spaghetti strap tank? Perhaps they need to learn to leave something to the imagination.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,Since I was about 15, my figure has been appreciated much more by black guys than white. I have a small upper body, little waist, and what I always considered a fat butt and thighs. However, my black boyfriend explained that neither he nor most young black men see it as fat; it is just a nice, healthy "thickness."He also explained to me four the basic levels of body mass - "skinny," which is unattractively thin, "slim," which is just that: Slender but not unnattractive, "thick," which is above slender but "with extra in the right places," and "fat," which unfortunately is unnattractively overweight. He says the extra flesh is a bonus if you carry it well. I guess you do!
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Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,Very interestng. Among the black male/white female couples at my school, I find the opposite to be true, which would better support your questionable "forbidden fruit" theory. Most of the black guys dating white girls have very pretty partners. This may be an inherent defense of the relationship - i.e. date someone whose attractiveness is undeniable to anyone. As a point of interest, many of the girls share a certain "thickness" as well.User Detail :
Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Framingham, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,
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