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Religion Questions 121-130

THE QUESTION:
RE130: Why are more and more youth nowadays forgetting the Creator? Is it that they feel they have to obey too many “Do’s and Don’ts”? If so, is there any solution? I like one quotation from Jesus: “I give you power to overcome sin, but not the rules and regulations.”
POSTED JAN. 4, 1999
Ratnakar <mecratna@mecheng.iisc.ernet.in>, Bangalore, India

ANSWER 1:
I think many young people neglect God and religion for two reasons: One, our parents are products of the unconventional, flower-power generation that rejected institutionalized religion, and it has therefore not been as impressed on us as on preceeding generations. Two, we live in an age of science and technology that runs contrary to many religious doctrines, and an age of high religious hypocrisy (Jim Baker, et al.) which discredits the messengers of the Lord.
POSTED JAN. 5, 1999
D.M.M., former Catholic <donikam@hotmail.com>, Charleston , SC
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THE QUESTION:
RE129: I would like to know if other American Indians consider “tribal” tattoos offensive, a silly trend or what? I also want to know if whites with tribal tattoos knew the serious religious meaning behind such tattoos before whites started getting them.
POSTED DEC. 28, 1998
A.C.C., Mexican and Indian, San Antonio, TX
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THE QUESTION:
RE128: I am Catholic and have always wondered why so many Jewish men have thick, unkempt beards. I assume it is part of their faith. Can someone tell me why?
POSTED DEC. 27, 1998
Xavier P., Catholic <perezxavier@hotmail.com>, Miami, FL

ANSWER 1:
All Jewish men do not have long unkempt beards; you are talking about a specific sect of the Jewish faith. Similar to Christianity, which has Catholics, Baptists, Presbyterians, Southern Baptists, Methodists, etc., the Jewish faith has many different sects – there are Conservative Jews, Reform Jews, Orthodox Jews, and then each group has its own breakdown. Most Orthodox Jews do not shave; the other sects do not practice this tradition.
POSTED DEC. 28, 1998
Jonk, white Jewish male, 33, West Palm Beach, FL

FURTHER NOTICE:
The practice of not shaving facial hair is limited to Orthodox Jewish sects as opposed to all Jewish men. Furthermore, this practice is not uncommon among Orthodox branches of other religions. For example, old-rite Russian Orthodox believers did not cut their hair or shave their beards and were willing to endure harsh persecution for that. I can speculate that Orthodox believers view their hair, including facial hair, as God-given, and that cutting it means somehow decimating God’s grace.
POSTED JAN. 5, 1999
Peter M., Russian-Jewish male <pmalakhov@alumni.csom.umn.edu>, St. Paul , MN

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
Torah requires that a man may not “scrape the corners of his head.” That’s the best that I can translate the Hebrew into English by memory; I don’t hav a copy handy. You will see that this seems to be an exceedingly vague requirement, and different groups have interpreted this in many different ways, so that today there are many different practices intended to meet this requirement. Some do not shave at all, some grow a beard but trim it neatly, others shave with an electric shaver only (believing that the electric, unlike a blade, does not constitute “scraping” as intended by Torah), and many other variations. Incidentally, the long curls grown by some from just above the sideburns is an entirely different custom that does not have a direct origin in Torah.
POSTED FEB. 1, 1999
Jesse N., 39, Jew <jesse.nadel@usa.net>, Herzliya, Israel
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THE QUESTION:
RE127: To Jews, Muslims, atheists and other non-Christian Americans: How do you feel about the assumption many Americans make that “Christmas is for everybody”? Do you feel alienated? Pressured to assimilate? Does it not bother you?
POSTED DEC. 22, 1998
Rhiannon, 28, proud cultural Jew and religious agnostic <rock0048@tc.umn.edu>, Minneapolis, MN

ANSWER 1:
I’m so glad you asked, at this most annoying time of year. As a free-thinker, I don’t like to rain (or snow) on anyone’s individual parade, but also I don’t care to be forced to celebrate someone else’s holiday. Everywhere you turn there are Santas, shoppers and sprinkled over the top of it, the insistence that “Jesus is the reason for the season.” Last night, my sweetie and I lit candles all over the house to celebrate the solstice and eventual return of the sun. I shouldn’t have to feel defensive about acknowledging the fact that the tilt of the earth on its axis is the reason for the season, but all this “Christmas” blitz does make me feel that way.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Becky, free-thinker married to Jew, Indianapolis , IN

FURTHER NOTICE:
I celebrate the commercialistic part of Christmas … the tree, the lights, the gifts, TV specials, etc. My Christian friends also do, but in addition they celebrate the religious part. To me, it’s a birthday party … why wouldn’t someone want to celebrate that? But if you really feel alienated and pressured, I suggest you make a stand, and go to work on the 25th of December.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
M.P.B. <CISMPB@aol.com>, Medford , NJ

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
As a Jewish youth, I often feel alienated, probably more than adults, due to the predominance Christmas holds in our little kiddie minds (gifts, mistletoe, vacation and spiked eggnog).
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Jewish youth <ajacobs14@yahoo.com>, Elkins Park , PA

FURTHER NOTICE 3:
I fully understand that I am living in a country that consists mainly of Christians. And I fully accept the fact that they have a right to celebrate this season. In fact, I often willingly participate in their celebration, and have for years. Where I have a problem is when my government (city, county, state, schools, etc.) spends its energy and funds on religious observances, even if the celebrating agency tips its hat to me by including my religion. That’s when I am made to feel I am some kind of guest in my own country.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Jerry, 65, white Jewish male, FL

FURTHER NOTICE 4:
Christmas is my least favorite time of the year because it is when I am subject to the greatest amount of proselytizing. It is a nearly constant thing and there are many Christians who cannot take “no” for an answer. I am not evangelistic in my atheism, and I believe it would be unconscionably rude for me to berate a Christian (or any other religious person for that matter) for his or her faith. Yet it seems many Christians have no compunctions about berating me for my choice of no religious belief. That said, I realize that it is only a few Christians who have this attitude … the rest are generally pleasant and reasonable people. I find that it is usually easiest to graciously accept a well-meant “Merry Christmas” and reply with “happy holidays” or something similar. My roommate is a Jehovah’s Witness, and she has considerable more difficulty than I do. In her case, simply being gracious and polite is not enough, and this is a very difficult time of the year for her. When someone asks her what she is doing for Christmas or something of that nature, she usually replies along the lines of “I don’t celebrate holidays, but thank you for asking. I hope you have a pleasant holiday.” This often results in her having to explain her religion to everyone who says Merry Christmas, and then frequently having to listen to people explain to her that she is going to hell, that she is not a real Christian, etc. It seems to me that people with religions other than traditional Christianity have a more difficult time than we atheists, although there is pressure to conform on all of us.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Randy S., 32, white male atheist, Atlanta , GA

FURTHER NOTICE 5:
I grew up in Toronto, so I’m not speaking from a typically American standpoint, but a more general North American one. Growing up culturally (but not necessarily religiously) Jewish in a predominantly non-Jewish public school in the ’80s, I always looked forward to Christmastime because it meant we’d have the annual school assembly where all the kids would pack into the gym and sing Christmas carols (and back then, we recited the Lord’s Prayer every day after the National Anthem and were allowed to sing religious carols as opposed to just cutesy ones). In fact, my favorite Christmas carol to this day is “Away In A Manger” – I love the melody.

Feeling that Christmas was all around me when I was growing up didn’t take anything away from my being Jewish. I still looked forward to lighting the Menorah at home, and learning about why we celebrated a different Biblical story at the same time as my non-Jewish friends. The same goes for Easter and Passover coinciding. I love tradition – I love Christmas songs, Christmas specials on TV, attending the Christmas Mass service at a friend’s church, egg nog, tree decorating, family get-togethers … it’s what Christmas represents that I really enjoy. I find it sad, however, that Christmas has become so commercialized for some that they get stressed out because they haven’t “crossed everybody off their shopping list” by a certain date. Each year, I love receiving Christmas/Happy Holiday cards from my friends and family around the world to let me know I’m being thought of during the holiday season. Anyway, that’s my two cents. Merry Christmas, Joyeux Noel, Mele Kalikimaka, happy holidays and Happy New Year to all.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Taneia, 25, mixed ethnicity/Jewish <taneia@sprint.ca>, Toronto, Ontario, Canada

FURTHER NOTICE 6:
I have noticed that Christians everywhere tend to think everyone celebrates Christmas. Even some of my friends who know I’m a witch were surprised to find I didn’t celebrate it. I don’t think this is an American phenomenon, though, since I found the same type of thing in Australia, too. I’ve never had any problems regarding my beliefs. Some people are surprised, but I’ve had very few negative responses from people. Most of those were from hardcore, born-again types (no offense intended to the non-preachy born-agains), and those people are difficult to begin with. The Christmas season doesn’t really bother me much. I find the commercialism a bit tacky, but most people do, and after all, yule was a pagan holiday to begin with, so I celebrate my own way while everybody else celebrates theirs.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Elric L., 29, Celtic/pagan <elefay@hotmail.com>, Pasadena, MD

FURTHER NOTICE 7:
Although I have been a practicing witch for more than 15 years, I don’t feel alienated during the Christmas holiday. I have warm memories of Christmas as a child with my family and continue to celebrate it each year with Christmas morning gift-giving and a traditional huge holiday meal with my family. Like most Wiccans, I am well aware that the timing (Winter Solstice or Yule) and many of the trappings (Christmas tree, mistletoe, wassail, yule log, etc.) are derived from pagan sources. My friends and I get a chuckle driving around pointing out houses decorated with pentagram (five-pointed star) lights on them this time of year. For seven years I DJ-aed a weekly alternative spirituality radio program and always included several multicultural programs to cover Yule/Hannukah/Christmas/Kwanzaa/Solstice, which included Jewish, pagan, Native American, feminist spirituality, lesbian/gay and ethnic Christmas sources. I still yearly share Winter Solstice ritual with my coven sisters. This is the first year I’ve had close friends celebrate Ramadan, so I’ve been learning more about this Muslim observance.

The times I have felt most alienated in the past were when I refused to attend Christmas Eve Candlelight Service at my parent’s Methodist Church (where I was a member before converting to Wicca). At that time my mother was quite vocally rejecting of Wicca and badgering me to rejoin the church. This irritated me immensely, so I stayed home alone while the rest of my family attended church, even my nominally Jewish brother-in-law. She has since lightened up on the subject. After my father died and I nearly lost mom to a heart attack two years ago, I have become more accommodating about accompanying her to Candlelight Service. I no longer feel I am compromising my spiritual beliefs as much as I am helping my widowed mother feel a sense of family togetherness. Maybe this is what people mean when they say “Christmas is for everybody” – not that everyone celebrates the Christian observance, but that this time of year is often marked by an outpouring of compassion for others and a sense of love, hope, joy and peace on earth.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
WitchWomon, Dianic witch <WitchWomon@aol.com>, Southfield, MI

FURTHER NOTICE 8:
Although Christmas is technically the celebration of Christ’s birth, there are so many other evolved aspects of the holiday that anybody can engage in. I am an atheist, and my husband is an agnostic, but we still take part in some aspects of Christmas. We view this as a good as time as any to catch up with friends and relatives. Also, we exchange gifts, and Santa Claus visits our children every year. The religious aspect is never mentioned. I have a friend who is a Unitarian who is married to a Buddhist. My friend tells me that her family celebrates the same way we do. I have considered it is presumptuous of some people to assume that everybody is a Christian by telling us all “Merry Christmas.” I don’t get too bent out of shape over it, though, because I believe these people are just trying to extend good will.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Michell, 31, white female, Panama City, FL

FURTHER NOTICE 9:
Where I live, Christmas is for everybody, whether you like it or not. Christmas carols, decorations and cards everywhere! And if you “aren’t in the Christmas spirit” you’re a scrooge. I’m an atheist, but my family is Jewish, so I’ve never celebrated Christmas. I feel like the whole world is in a club that I’m not a member of. I can get into Santa and Christmas trees but I can’t swallow the rest of it. It is in the spirit of Christmas that many “Christians” tell me I will burn in Hell.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Amy, 29, atheist

FURTHER NOTICE 10:
I don’t often feel like an outsider in my own society, but as a non-believing Jew, this is a surreal time of year for me. America seems to think Santa and Jesus and reindeer and elves are for everybody, but in truth there are many of us who just don’t give a damn and aren’t part of the Big Happy Christian Family. I don’t feel pressure to assimilate – I’m not an assimilating kind of guy – but I do feel eager at times for Christmas to just get finished already. Thanks for the question.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Andrew, 35, Jewish background <ziptron@start.com.au>, Huntington , NY

FURTHER NOTICE 11:
Although I am an atheist, I can understand why Christians believe it is a holiday for , mostly because it is a time when families come together. We all enjoy that – those are human feelings that have been around long before people started making up religious beliefs. Actually, I am more offended by local governments and merchants who put up “Jesus paraphernalia” around the holidays, completely ignoring Jewish people and us atheists.
POSTED DEC. 24, 1998
Greg, 36, atheist <greg@hotmail.com>

FURTHER NOTICE 12:
As a Muslim, I don’t feel Christmas is bothersome. Muslims do believe in Christ, but as a prophet, not as Lord or God. Islam is a powerful and strong religion, so I don’t get intimidated by Christmas. Christmas is good, especially for children.
POSTED DEC. 27, 1998
A Muslim, 35, Minneapolis, MN

FURTHER NOTICE 13:
I have occasionally been told I was expected to contribute toward office Christmas decorations, and that stuck in my teeth (I’m Jewish). But what does annoy me year after year is that I am forced to take time off for various Christian holidays, which have been given government or commercial sanction, but in order to celebrate Jewish holidays I have to use vacation time or unpaid leave. And when the school principal said that a Christmas tree was not a religious symbol, our Rabbi asked him why the school didn’t decorate an oak tree in May instead.
POSTED FEB. 2, 1999
Jerry S., 50, Jewish <jerryschwartz@comfortable.com>, New Britain, CT
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THE QUESTION:
RE126: Are there Jews who have converted to other religions?

POSTED DEC. 18, 1998
Joe C., 32, Chinese male, Fremont , CA

ANSWER 1:
Yes, there are Jews who have converted to other religions, just as people of other faiths have converted to Judaism (and to other religions as well). I am curious about your question, though. Do you perceive Judaism, or Jews, to be somehow different from other religions/peoples in this regard?
POSTED DEC. 22, 1998
Dan, Jewish male <daniel5@hotmail.com>, New York, NY
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THE QUESTION:
RE125: It’s my belief that Missionaries have brought nothing but destroyed cultures and local histories to originally non-Christian communities, and that people in Christian societies are more promiscuous and live less harmoniously. Do these Missionaries have no respect for local cultures, which may have longer histories than Christianity?
POSTED DEC. 18, 1998
Joe C., 32, Chinese male, Fremont , CA

ANSWER 1:
To me, missionaries have the utmost respect for the societies in which they preach. They are preaching because they have some great news (the Gospel of Jesus Christ), and they want to share it with others. If you had something that was really wonderful, and anyone could have it, wouldn’t you want to tell others about it? As to the part about Christians being promiscuous and disharmonious, who were you watching? In a religion as large as Christianity, there are going to be some people who do not live its teachings fully. You will find this with any religion. Most of the Christians I’ve observed have been good, honest, moral people.
POSTED JAN. 4, 1999
T.R., 16, Christian (Latter-Day Saints) <beforpeace@yahoo.com>, San Jose, CA

FURTHER NOTICE:
I don’t particularly agree or disagree with the bit about promiscuity, but I feel very strongly that Missions are an intolerant practice. They go to happy people who are practicing their own culture, and take to them the attitude that they are ignorant savages who need “enlightenment.” It’s bad enough in the United States, where non-Christians generally have experience telling Missionaries to p— off, but here in Israel they are starting to set up shop. The problem is, most Israelis have close family who have been murdered or killed in wars for their faith but have no practical experience with Missionaries and do not know how to deal with them firmly. To me, it’s incredibly offensive to try to sell Christianity to a mother who lost a parent to Hitler and a son to Syria defending their Judaism.
POSTED FEB. 2, 1999
Jesse N., 39, Jew <jesse.nadel@usa.net>, Herzliya, Israel

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
The most important motivation (perhaps the only valid one) behind Christian Missionary activity is the desire to share the good news with those who have not heard it. Imagine that you have discovered the cure for cancer: Surely you will not keep this great discovery to yourself when the whole world could benefit from it. There are different approaches to missions. Some so-called Missionaries have wanted to “civilize” supposedly primitive peoples; in other words make them into Europeans. In the process, they have damaged or destroyed the cultural heritage of these peoples. But this is not the only approach possible. A much more respectful approach is to adapt Christianity to the local culture, to tell the people that they do not have to abandon their culture if they choose to embrace Christianity. A good example of this approach is the Jesuit missionary to China, Matteo Ricci (1532-1610), who dressed in Chinese clothing, spoke fluent Mandarin Chinese, developed an interest in Chinese literature, and finally asked the Vatican for permission to celebrate mass in Chinese instead of Latin. Unfortunately, the Vatican could not see the wisdom of Ricci’s ideas.

The question of the relation between culture and religion has been an issue since the beginning of the Church. Christianity was born out of Judaism, and the New Testament records the conflict over whether non-Jewish Christians should be circumcised and follow the Jewish dietary laws. It was decided that it was not necessary for converts to participate in these Jewish cultural practices. Christian Missionaries would do well to keep this precedent in mind, for Christianity must not be identified with Western culture and civilization.
POSTED FEB. 5, 1999
C,. female, 21, Religious Studies student, Montreal, Quebec, Canada
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THE QUESTION:
RE124: What are some basic traditions of Middle Eastern people, as in Muslims or Jews? I’m conducting research for a class presentation.
POSTED DEC. 16, 1998
D. Wiley, Altoona, IA
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THE QUESTION:
RE123: What do Christians believe happened to people who died before Jesus came? How about people who have never heard of him, or children who die before knowing him?
POSTED DEC. 11, 1998
Jeni B., 44, Jew, female, Boston, MA

ANSWER 1:
1) Many Christians believe that before Jesus came, people who died went to one of two places that roughly correspond to paradise and hell. To atone for sins (and hopefully avoid hell) people made sacrifices out of living animals. 2) Many Christians today accept the notion of “the age of accountability”; that is, you are mature enough to be held accountable for your life and actions. Children who die before they reach this age are automatically admitted to heaven. Some Christians (not all) believe that people who have never heard of Jesus never reach the age of accountability. Also, many Catholics believe that babies who die unbaptized end up in “Limbo” until Christ returns.
POSTED DEC. 28, 1998
Andrea L., 31, white, Catholic <Alenze@Hotmail.com>, Ann Arbor, MI
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THE QUESTION:
RE122: I’ve noticed that many Native American men I see have long hair. Is this for spiritual/religious reasons, or just preference?
POSTED DEC. 11, 1998
K. O’Connor, 26, Hispanic, Salt Lake City, UT

ANSWER 1:
It depends on the tribal tradition. For some it’s a cultural tradition, but some tribes have spiritual beliefs saying you should not cut what the Creator has given you, that you are making yourself unnatural if you do. Some tribes traditionally believed your hair is the emblem of your sexuality, so cutting it is symbolically saying you’re sexless. In these same traditions, you cut your hair after the loss of your spouse, to symbolize your loss.
POSTED DEC. 14, 1989
A.C.C., Mexican and American Indian, San Antonio, TX
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THE QUESTION:
RE121: What exactly is the difference between Agnostic and Atheist? Do you have any beliefs at all, i.e. in heaven and hell?
POSTED DEC. 11, 1998
Jenny, 28, Roman Catholic, MI

ANSWER 1:
From the Oxford Dictgionary of World Religions (1997): “Agnosticism – A position distinguished from theism and atheism equally, by its view that neither in principle nor in fact is it possible to know God’s nature or whether he even exists.” Thus, an agnostic would likely require proof of the existence of a “heaven” or “hell” before buying into those concepts. Some consider agnosticism comparable to the Deism popular in Thomas Jefferson’s time. “Atheism – Disbelief in the existence of God: To be distinguished from agnosticism, which professes uncertainty on the question. The Biblical reference to the fool who says ‘There is no God!’ (Psalm 14.1) suggests that it is no new phenomenon.” An atheist would not believe in the existence of heavens, hells, demons, fairies, saviors, gods, ghosts, afterlife,etc They are all, as Sigmund Freud put it, “part of the psychic activity of man.” See my question at RE56 as to possible locations of “heaven” or “hell” for some interesting answers.
POSTED DEC. 16, 1998
Ed H., white male, 56 <EdHam0132@aol.com>, Silver Springs, FL

FURTHER NOTICE:
I am an Atheist, so my answer is colored by that fact. The primary difference between an Atheist and an Agnostic is dedication. An Atheist is one who knows (or “believes,” if you prefer) there is no God, while an Agnostic is simply unsure on the issue. The term “atheist” means “no God/deity,” and, as such, atheists tend to be as absolute and unwavering in their non-belief in “God” as the Pope is unwavering in his belief in God. The term “Agnostic” was coined by famed anthropologist Thomas Huxley, who felt there was enough known of science to discount the possibility of “Gods,” but there was also enough known about science to see the astonishing order of the universe, and the seeming benevolent hand of some guiding force, which you may call “God.” Many Atheists (myself included) view Agnostics as a somewhat wishy-washy bunch, who seem to be hedging their bets in the event there does turn out to be a “God.” Inversely, many Agnostics view Atheists as being as fanatical and closed-minded as many Christians, and therefore, are as equally repugnant to their sensibilities. While the difference between an Atheist and Agnostic may seem trivial to many Christians, it�s as vast as the difference between a Catholic and Protestant.
POSTED DEC. 16, 1998
Donn, 21 <cthulhu23@hotmail.com>, Minneapolis , MN

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