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Age-related Questions 41-50

THE QUESTION:
A43: Why is it that in high school, it’s cool to be dumb, to seem dumb or to do badly in school? I’m more than an average student, and have been criticized for being so. Mind you, I don’t show off. So why is this?
POSTED MARCH 19, 1999
K.L., 15, Hamilton, Ontario, Canada

ANSWER 1:
I think many of my peers have a “live fast and hard” mentality. Teens think they are invincible (hence high usage of drugs, alcohol, smokes; and high instances of unprotected sex), and are incredibly short-sighted. They feel the adult word of taxes and old age is so far away that nothing they do now will put them in a bad situation for the immediate future. Mom and Dad will take care of them. That’s why kids are not really concerned with becoming erudite, learned and productive members of society. I have been in honors and gifted classes since second grade (I will graduate from high school this June) and have been tormented from the beginning because I prefer reading to “cruising,” etc. There are a lot of smart kids, and I think more and more, teens are becoming interested in a good college education and great future. But there is still a significant portion of teenage society that would love to go to the biggest party school they can find, scrape by with Cs and somehow be able to afford the things they would like as an adult.
POSTED MARCH 22, 1999
A.C., 18, “gifted” student, Milwaukee Area, WI

FURTHER NOTICE:
Graduating in 1995, I can testify that most classmates criticize you because they envy you. Forget about the thoughts of other people and concentrate on your own future as you see fit.
POSTED MARCH 22, 1999
Christopher D., 22, male <ngc1977@hotmail.com>, Arlington, TX

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
The beauty of this problem is that it goes away as you get older. That may not help now, but it’s something to look forward to. In a few years, those people who now give you a hard time will probably be wishing they were in your shoes. As your peers mature, it will no longer be cool to act like you don’t care. You’ll be better off for not having fallen into it.
POSTED MARCH 24, 1999
Britt, 29, Birmingham , AL

FURTHER NOTICE 3:
It was the exact same way when I was in high school. Back when I was in elementary school, I was admired for being intelligent. I read to my kindergarten class, was always tops on the tmie math tests, and ended up at a college reading level by the time I was in 5th grade. I thought this would carry me for the rest of my school career. How wrong I was.

By the time I got to 7th grade, I was ridiculed, mocked and harassed every single day by the “dumb” people. Ninety-nine percent of the time, it was the jocks. They couldn’t figure out the whole “you’re/your” thing by the time they graduated high school, but they still got all the popularity and girls. I would fake sick at least a day each week on average just because I couldn’t handle it. I actually got to the point in high school by my junior year of simply not caring about my grades any more. I still graduated at 16, but looking back, I just made a wrong decision.

So basically, why is it cool to be dumb? Because as I observed in high school (and this may only prove true for only my high school), the jocks had all the popularity, and these jocks were “dumb” because they devoted all their energy to sports and nothing to academics. And you know how people love an athlete.
POSTED APRIL 5, 1999
K. Wojtaszek, 19, nerd/geek/loser/whatever <edicius@hotmail.com>, Clinton Township, MI
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THE QUESTION:
A42: To retired people: What do you do all day?
POSTED MARCH 18, 1999
C.P., 21, Montreal, Canada

ANSWER 1:
In short, anything we want to! Have you ever noticed how much cleaner our cars are, how nice the yards are, how we tend to go off for three or four days at a time? We also do things like woodwork, handweave, paint, pottery, act, crafts, remodel our homes, help others, etc. There are some who drink, sit at the TV and die soon. Lots of us spend years traveling in RVs seeing the United States up close and personal. Think of a number of things you would like to do, and then ask if you can afford to do them now; if not, that is what you would do when you retire. When I was in high school, I made a list of things I would like to do before I die. I’ve done all but two, one of which I will never do. Maybe I’ll never die!
POSTED MARCH 22, 1999
C.F., Del Rio , TX

FURTHER NOTICE:
Wow. Where do I begin? My wife and I have questioned ourselves on how we had found time to work before we retired. I play golf 3 to 4 times a week, go fishing and netting, and am cleaning out our back lot (about 200′ x 100′) of weeds, trees and palmettos. When this is finished, I need to complete building a walkway around our house (we are on stilts) and then buy more oyster shells and finish filling in the driveway. Then there is church work (I am on the building and grounds committee) for a congregation of about 30 to 40 mostly older people. My wife plays bridge 2 to 3 afternoons weekly, serves as ombudsman for Florida nursing homes and is a member and secretary the local Historical Society, Garden Club and Presbyterian Women. Then there is the furniture I am refinishing and … well, you know, on and on it goes. I am sure if you are thinking of retiring, there will be plenty of things to keep you busy if you look for something to do.
POSTED MARCH 22, 1999
Phil J., 63, male <JPHILJONES@AOL.COM>, Port St. Joe , FL

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
I’m not sure what they do, but I wish they would take care of their grocery and other shopping needs during the weekdays, when most of us are at work. Why is it that they come out after 4 p.m. and on weekends to go to the stores and malls? This is a real hardship where I live (South Florida). Am I asking too much?
POSTED MARCH 22, 1999
D.S.J., 47, West Palm Beach , FL

FURTHER NOTICE 3:
Can I add something to my original question? I would also like to know what retired people who are not rich do with their time. I know there are many senior citizens for whom travelling, renovating their homes, etc. is financially out of the question.
POSTED MARCH 22, 1999
C.P., 21, Montreal , Canada
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THE QUESTION:
A41: I have noticed that younger males like to expose the band of their underwear so it is just visible above the waist of their pants. I am curious about this phenomena. Could someone please enlighten me?
POSTED MARCH 15, 1999
T. Evans, 39 <tamring@aol.com>, San Diego, CA
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