Race/Ethnicity Questions 231-240

THE QUESTION:
R240: Is it true that black men find it sexy if a woman does not shave her legs or underarms?
POSTED MAY 3, 1998
Dave O., white male, Hazel Park, MI

ANSWER 1:
Do I find hairy legs sexy on a woman? No. I can deal with some hair on the legs, but hairy underarms? No.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
Jas, black male <themoa@aol.com>, Pensacola, FL

FURTHER NOTICE:
I only know one guy who likes hairy sisters. I think shaving is good; I shave my armpits and legs. My mother taught me as an early teen that it looks nicer if you aren’t hairy like a man.
POSTED MAY 7, 1998
Carmela, 29, black <pecola@hotmail.com>, Atlanta, Ga

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
I have never found hairy-legged women sexy. Hairy underarms are not sexy, either. I understand some men like hairy legs, but it is not specific to black men.
POSTED MAY 12, 1998
D.W., 43, black male <dmwomega1@compuserve.com>, New Orleans, LA

FURTHER NOTICE 3:
I don’t believe that is true. I am engaged to a black man. He nearly refuses to touch me if I have gone a day or two without shaving my legs. So that doesn’t apply to black men. I dated a white man who didn’t mind at all if I had shaved or not. Although I always shave my arm pits.
POSTED OCT. 7, 1998
A.B., 20, white female <abolser@hotmail.com.>, Indianapolis, IN
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THE QUESTION:
R239: Why do black people complain about being harassed by white store owners? How can you blame these owners when a higher percentage of the black population is in jail than any other ethnic group?
POSTED MAY 3, 1998
J. Rosenbough <Razz32@netrover.com>, Kalamazoo, MI

ANSWER 1:
As white store owners/security harass black patrons, they ignore white customers who are “stealing the store blind.” I don’t blame white store owners, I blame blacks who force their money on people who really do not respect them.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
Wanda, 27, Detroit, MI

FURTHER NOTICE:
Not every black person steals. The store owner is racist in thinking that every black person that comes into his store is going to steal something.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
Brian, white <meantime@worldnet.att.net>, Livonia, MI

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
Is it possible more black people are in jail because the American justice system, beginning with the cops on the street, is biased? Is it possible that the constant portrayal on TV and in movies of young black men as gangsters and drug addicts seeps into the minds of the police, the lawyers, the prosecutors, the judges? Is it possible that poor black people get put in prison even when they’re innocent because they can’t afford adequate legal representation? Is it possible that O.J. and other wealthy people stay out of prison even if they’re guilty because they did have the money to get good lawyers? Is it possible that people who are disenfranchised and uneducated sometimes turn to crime and drugs because they’re desperate and in despair?
POSTED MAY 7, 1998
Sara S,. Oakland, CA

FURTHER NOTICE 3:
I was a telephone operator for five years and processed many collect calls from prisons all over the United States. I tried an experiment one day: I tracked 100 prison calls and marked them “black” or “white” for each caller. Around 60 percent were white; 40 percent were black.
POSTED MAY 9, 1998
KIM, Orange Park, FL

FURTHER NOTICE 4:
To J. Rosenbough: Have you ever wondered why more blacks are in jail? The justice system is extremely biased. Poverty and social class are the primary bases for predicting who will commit crime. Race assesses who should be punished the most. Why do blacks make up 29 percent of those arrested yet make up 50 percent of the jail population? Often , blacks are given longer sentences than whites for the same crime.
POSTED MAY 9, 1998
Kara, Japan

FURTHER NOTICE 5:
Think about this: You need to buy a gift for a friend and you go into a store, with money to spend, and the whole time you are there, someone is following you, watching your every move. You have done nothing wrong and in no way shown you have criminal intent. How would you feel? What if that happened most of the time you shopped, especially if you shopped at a high-end store? How would you feel?

Until it happens to you, you cannot understand the feelings of anger, etc. you would feel. My money is just as good as anyone’s money, no matter what their race. It is as if I am presumed guilty of theft before a crime has even been committed (“Oh, yeah. You know they all steal and cheat and lie and rob…”)

Just because a higher percentage of the black population may or may not be in jail does not mean all black people should be prejudged criminals. In that case, I should dislike all white people because when I was growing up during segregation and marched for civil rights with my parents at the age of seven, whites threw tomatoes, bricks and anything they could get their hands on at me, spat at me and called me “nigger.” Would I be justified in hating all whites for that? Or in assuming all whites were like the ones who did those horrible things to a seven-year-old they did not know? If in fact you are white, should I hate you?

Before you judge people of different races or nationalities, or even people of your own race, walk a mile in their shoes – take the time to get to know them. You might learn something. Sorry I went on and on – just wanted you to know about me.
POSTED MAY 23, 1998
Cheryl G., 44, black <blackcherrie@yahoo.com>, Jacksonville, FL

FURTHER NOTICE 6:
My dad worked in retail, and I used to work in his store in the summers. The store manager (my immediate boss) was black. I am white, but a lot of my fellow clerks were black. Many times we had customers try to walk off with something they hadn’t paid for. Of the dozens of times this happened – with two exceptions – the shoplifters were black. None of us trusted black customers after a while … and that included the black store employees. We always took an extra look at a black customer, though we tried not to be obnoxious about it. The experience was incredibly lopsided, and even now, years later, I am not as trusting as I should be.
POSTED JULY 22, 1998
Dan, white <danielrand@hotmail.com>, NY, NY

FURTHER NOTICE 7:
As a law enforcement officer, I would like to address the assertion that blacks are jailed at disproportionately high rates. The assertion that blacks are being unfairly targeted by law enforcement could be plausible if it weren’t for the fact that FBI statistics of arrest rates (as broken down by race) mirror the crime report rates (as broken down by race). The deviation of percentages between the reports is less than 1.5 percent. This stands to reason, because law enforcement agencies generally seek to arrest a white person when a white person is reported to have committed a crime, and a black person when a black person is reported to have committed it. More than 93 percent of all crime reports in the United States contain information about the race of the perpetrator. FBI statisticians have extrapolated that information to reveal that blacks, as 13.9 percent of the overall population, commit more than 46 percent of the crimes in the United States. Statistically, blacks are more than 16 times more likely to commit a crime (per capita) than whites. That’s not to say it is acceptable to target blacks for harassment in stores … or anywhere. It’s morally repugnant to single out any group for mistreatment on the basis of race. But it’s understandable, with the high crime rates being what they are, why store managers feel it’s prudent to keep an eye on everyone who comes in their stores. If store employees have the impression that blacks are more likely to commit a crime than whites (as the statistics indicate), it’s easy to see how this can happen.
POSTED AUG. 9, 1998
Roger B., 35, white <HighCommander@iname.com>, Columbia, SC
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THE QUESTION:
R238: Recently I was informed that the term “Oriental,” when used to identify someone, might be offensive. Why is this?
POSTED MAY 3, 1998
Eugene W. <eweishan@execpc.com>, Milwaukee, WI

ANSWER 1:
If someone called you “Occidental,” wouldn’t you feel rather funny? Occidental can mean “from the Western world.” It can also be derogatory. In regard to “Oriental,the question is: Oriental to whose point of view? Oriental means from the Orient, from the “Far East,” and the word has connotations such as “exotic,” “illusive” and “golden pagodas.” The word “Oriental” starts from the point of view of a Westerner, looking east toward the Orient, the Far East. I’m Asian and American. I’m not from the East, and I don’t consider myself exotic or from the “Orient.” I’m just a plain American who likes watching the Packers and “The Simpsons” once in a while.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
David L., 25, Asian-American, Chicago, IL

FURTHER NOTICE:
The term “Oriental” has a cultural sense, so you’d better use it only when speaking in cultural context, such as when you’re trying to emphasize one’s cultural background or feature. But out of that, being referred to as (or called) an “Oriental” is degrading – like I’m just a thing, an object. I agree with what David said, and I’d like to add that although I’m Asian and from the East, I don’t consider myself exotic. Even if I prefer Asian things (music, literature, movies, etc) much more than American or Western things, it’s no excuse to call me “Oriental.”
POSTED JUNE 19, 1998
Chi Y., 26, Asian female,Indonesia
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THE QUESTION:
R237: It seems to me that black males generally have better physiques than white males. Is this true, and if so, why?
POSTED MAY 3, 1998
R.M., white female, Jacksonville, FL

ANSWER 1:
I don’t know if you are referring to the general population or to sports figures. Many of the black and white males I know have terrible physiques. I don’t think one group has a better physique than any other group. If you are finding that black males are in better shape, you need to broaden your sample of men. As a longtime gym member in three different states, I have found that the black male members are in worse shape than the white male members.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
Jas, black male <themoas@aol.com>, Pensacola, FL

FURTHER NOTICE:
I would tend to disagree with Jas’ post. As someone who has worked out in many different gyms over the past 20 years, I have found that the percentage of black men with great bodies is far greater than that of white men. But this type of personal opinion is not really useful. I believe the questioner was inquiring whether blacks had an advantage over white men when it comes to getting in shape. One must be careful to avoid broad generalizations and stereotyping in this area, but it is known that the races differ in their muscle/fat ratio, with races from tropical climates having lower body fat than those from colder climes, who evolved with higher body fat for protection. What this means is that a greater percentage of black men would be able to add lean muscle mass without adding fat than is true for white men. This is most clearly evident in bodybuilding competitions. While white men and black men place equally in contests in which bodybuilders use steroids, in contests where drug-testing is firmly enforced, blacks far outplace whites. While one might say that this results from social and cultural realities (who dedicates themselves to the gym and who doesn’t), the fact that this discrepancy is not seen in contests that allow steroids indicates white men need growth-enhancing drugs more often than do black men in order to compete.
POSTED MAY 6, 1998
Mark M. white <marknyc@hotmail.com>, New York, NY

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
I think it is important to take into account the degree to which public perception has been shaped in the last 25 years. Since the early 1970s, one of African Americans’ first significant post-civil rights successes has been the integration of American professional sports. Some sports now have a 50 percent or higher percentage of black athletes. This is a powerful media image, and one that can create in the mind of the public a perception that African Americans in general exhibit the qualities that are most seen in the sports/media. I would say that African Americans are no healthier relative to other cultural groups, only that their public image is currently dominated by an image of the black athlete.
POSTED MAY 6, 1998
Michael <msmacharg@aol.com>, Washington, DC

FURTHER NOTICE 3:
I guess I’m not really asking about black males who work out in gyms or who are sports stars. I’m talking about the general population of black males and white males that I see in everyday life. In that situation, I tend to see many more black males with good physiques than white males. So it’s not an observation I’m deriving from the media (I don’t watch TV) or from a small sampling, but from what I’m seeing around me day to day.
POSTED MAY 6, 1998
R.M., white female, Jacksonville, FL

FURTHER NOTICE 4:
To Mark: You made some good points, as each race has had to adapt to the local environment in which they lived. However, even though genetics can give you the potential, hard work and dedication are still the only way to succeed. For the average black male, genetics don’t seem to be helping at all when it comes to trying to “get lean.” I wasn’t talking about “bodybuilders” as you noted, just the ordinary guy coming from work who hits the gym for a quick workout. I tend to agree with Michael that the media has given a perception that blacks have better physiques than the general population (it’s hard not to see this in magazines or newspapers). Although R.M. states it’s what she is seeing around her, I would like her to give specific examples. I could make the opposite case in my town, where I find more white men working without shirts on (taking advantage of the warm sun) than black men, and the white men have good physiques. I would have to look just a little bit harder, and I probably would find just as many blacks with good physiques.
POSTED MAY 7, 1998
Jas, black <themoas@aol.com>, Pensacola, FL

FURTHER NOTICE 5:
I, too, have a sense there are more black men for whom muscular development comes naturally, without the requirement of concentrated gym work (despite all the overweight black men with high blood pressure). I know of no research to back up my impression. The possibility brings up an idea that’s highly volatile: Genetic difference. Blacks endured the Middle Passage (often-lethal transportation on slave ships to America) and, once here, were subjected to the same kind of selective breeding as farm animals. Because both were hideous abuses and the latter was one of the most offensive aspects of slavery, even broaching the subject raises ire. Still, some believe these realities led to lasting genetic alteration. As I said: A highly explosive concept, and no one has conclusive data. Racists use it to “prove” that blacks have genetically lower intelligence and other negative traits. Others cite it as the reason for black people’s athletic excellence. I have no idea what’s true, but I wonder.
POSTED MAY 11, 1998
Will H., Euro-American, 48, gay, Dallas, TX

FURTHER NOTICE 6:
Do black men have better physiques? Hmmm, I’m a black woman and I’ve generally noticed that myself. Whether that is a fact, I don’t know. But what I do know is that black men have higher levels of testosterone than white men. This is a medically established fact that researchers believe is part of the reason black men are at a higher risk for prostate cancer. Now, testosterone effects muscle development and (during adolescent years) penile development. This may be the root of many black male attributes. However, the issue is so controversial it is rarely discussed. I hope this sheds a little light on your question.
POSTED JUNE 17, 1998
Sandy, 30, black female <ThPanther@aol.com>, Elizabeth, NJ

FURTHER NOTICE 7:
I majored in anatomy in college. It is not necessarily true that blacks have a better overall physique than other races. However, scientifically speaking, blacks have the best muscle tone in the world. Simply put, when a black man/woman’s muscles are in a relaxed state, they are still much more flexed than in other people. This is genetics and is no guarantee of an overall great body. A lot depends on what you put into it, but in terms of natural muscular strength, blacks have a slight predisposition to size and tone.
POSTED JULY 27, 1998
D.M.M., white female, SC
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THE QUESTION:
R236: I was recently talking to a friend who had spent some time in Mexico. He speaks fluent Spanish, and I mentioned that I would like to travel to Havana to see the changes going on in that city. Although I obviously knew that Mexico and Cuba have different and individual cultures, I was surprised by his response of actually being afraid of inevitably using Mexican dialect or habits in Cuba. He informed me that Mexicans and Cubans typically do not like each other. Does anyone know why this might be?
POSTED MAY 3, 1998
Tim G., 24, white male <gilmoret@bellsouth.net>, Jacksonville, FL

ANSWER 1:
I am not Hispanic but was married to a Hispanic woman for 10 years. She was Puerto Rican and never had a problem being associated with Spanish, Cuban or Puerto Rican people. If anyone mistook her for Mexican, however, she would become quite angry. She told me she did not like Mexicans and thought of them as not really being Hispanic.
POSTED MAY 12, 1998
D.W., 43, black male <dmwomega1@compuserve.com>, New Orleans, LA

FURTHER NOTICE:
Maybe I should respond, as I’m a native Cuban. We don’t hate or dislike Mexicans in any way. Our cultures differ in many ways, but it does not mean we hate each other. As in any country or culture, you will find people you like and people you totally dislike. Many Mexicans are visiting Cuba today. You should go and enjoy!
POSTED JUNE 3, 1998
C. Marticorena, 39, Cuban, cdammit1@gte.net, Panorama City, CA

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
If someone confused me with a Cuban I would not be offended, but I would correct them and inform them of the difference. It is not that Cubans and Mexicans or Puerto Ricans do not get along. It is that our heritage and customs are very different. The accents and dialects are different as well. It’s the same as the difference between people of England and the United States. The language is the same, but the cultures are unique.
POSTED JUNE 4, 1998
Connie A., Mexican-American, Elk Grove, CA

FURTHER NOTICE 3:
It would have been helpful if you made clear what kind of Cubans you were referring to, i.e. whether they were from the island or from the United States. As a Mexican who has visited Cuba, I never encountered hostility from the Cuban people; however, when I was in Miami, I noticed that every Cuban tended to view everything from a political perspective. They could not understand that there are people in this world who do not have a problem with Castro. I guess they have a problem with Mexican foreign policy and fail to realize that Mexicans do not care who is in power in Cuba. I feel they have the sentiment that you either are with them or against them.
POSTED JUNE 13, 1998
Felipe Z., 23, Mexican, Felipe.Zatarain@GTE.net, North Hollywood, CA

FURTHER NOTICE 4:
I am Cuban and do not have any problem with Mexicans. As a matter of fact, I don’t really know why people don’t like Mexicans. Mexicans are very nice people, and they will help you if you are in trouble without expecting anything back. Mexican people speak Spanish just like any other Spanish/Hispanic people, they do not speak Mexican like some people believe, because there is no such language. Their country is very beautiful, therefore we should learn more about them and respect them. They are beautiful people, like everybody else.
POSTED JUNE 13, 1998
M.E., 30, Cuban, CA

FURTHER NOTICE 5:
I am Mexican, and it’s not the fact that someone would confuse me with Cuban, Puerto Rican or any other race that bothers me. It’s the fact that someone would be so rude to assume I am a certain race without even bothering to ask me. If someone is so interested in knowing my race, they should have the common courtesy to ask.
POSTED JUNE 25, 1998
Aztlan, 21, Mexican female <aestra@chmc.org>, Bothell, WA
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THE QUESTION:
R235: Why do whites momentarily smile at me when I pass them, but once past, their facial expression turns plain? Is this the same as African Americans saying “what’s up” by nodding their heads?
POSDED MAY 3, 1998
Kenneth D., 19, black <Dark0001@unf.edu>
Jacksonville, FL

ANSWER 1:
I’m sure you’ve noticed there’s a cultural difference. Black folks tend to greet each other as if they knew each other; white folks tend not to greet each other unless they know each other. But yes, that little smile is just an acknowledgment, meaning “hi” or “what’s up.” As usual, we white folks are just a little more reserved and uptight!
POSTED MAY 7, 1998
Joan,. San Francisco, CA

FURTHER NOTICE:
I agree. It’s a quick way to say hello. White people tend to be less outspoken than black people, especially in public situations such as that. It’s just a difference in culture, but the two actions mean the same thing and carry the same importance. You might also consider whether the person is in deep thought or is paying attention closely to something else at the time you walk by. Don’t be offended.
POSTED DEC. 2, 1998
Vesta T., 22, Caucasian, Amarillo, Tx
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THE QUESTION:
R234: I have noticed that black men seem to grab at their clothes a lot when greeting people or simply standing around shooting the breeze with their friends. Why is this done? Is it out of habit or upbringing or social behaviors?
POSTED MAY 2, 1998
35-year-old white woman, Jacksonville, FL

ANSWER 1:
I, too have noticed that black males tend to tug at their clothing quite often while doing just about anything. And I’m not going to waste anyone’s time by beating around the bush. We all know what part of their body they grab the most: Their crotch. Now, if I could persuade anyone to continue by asking the question we all know was intended, let’s move on.
POSTED NOV. 16, 1998
Patrick <Patch9373>, Naperville, IL
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THE QUESTION:
R233: We are often told to be colorblind, but we are also often shown the achievements of people from various minority races. Both are important, yet seem contradictory. I’m curious to hear comments on this.
POSTED MAY 2, 1998
Tim G., 24 <gilmoret@bellsouth.net>, Jacksonville, FL

ANSWER 1:
Reality is that the colorblind theory will take many years to take hold. Further, the only way this theory will come to pass is if those who see purely in color begin to see a level of equality of accomplishment. When one looks at the issue of racial difference, one must realize that there are a number of stereotypical behaviors attached to it. It is only through the recognition of equal accomplishments that society can correct this grave problem. Unfortunately, this issue is fueled by ignorance, but through the media’s exposure of the accomplishments of all people, the correction has begun and will continue with the generations to come. It is so very difficult to change attitudes, but through education and exposure, the day may come when we are truly a colorblind society.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
K. Taylor <kdm05@bellsouth.net>, Jacksonville, FL

FURTHER NOTICE:
We could be colorblind if textbooks had always shown people of all races making achievements. When I was in public school, there was only one black person pictured in any of my school textbooks: George Washington Carver. I believe it is very important that we continue to show achievements of minorities. It may be hard for you to realize that because today, great efforts are being made to illustrate achievements made by minorities, but it wasn’t always like that. From my history books in grade school, no black people existed except for the slaves. My education about American history was so unbalanced that we cannot become colorblind in achievements until the scales have been balanced.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
Jas, black, 42 <themoas@aol.com>, Pensacola, FL

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
The idea that we should be colorblind is losing credibility. Why would we want to be oblivious to the reality of genuine variation and diversity? These are the very things that make life interesting. No one fails to notice another’s color unless that person is literally blind. The issue is to see all of the reality that exists, thus seeing it without preconceived notions (a.k.a. prejudice). In that light, it’s important to highlight the accomplishments of our many forebears, especially those who have been slighted by Euro-centric history. The apparent contradiction disappears.
POSTED MAY 11, 1998
Will H., Euro-American, 48, gay, Dallas, TX

FURTHER NOTICE 3:
“Colorblind” has been referred to as “the myth of sameness.” Maybe it is a myth espoused by people uncomfortable acknowledging difference. In general, human beings are not colorblind. We see the radiance of the orange and red sunset, the cool purples of an iris and the ever changing blues and grays of the sky. We see different colors. People also have distinct and beautiful hues: Creamy, dusty brown, deep black, ad infinitum. Likewise, we have different histories, different accomplishments, different cultures and traditions. I can’t imagine a monochromatic natural world, so why would I strive to see people without the glory of all their colors and histories? To fully experience life, I respect and honor differences as much as the colors that infuse our visual experience of nature.
POSTED MAY 12, 1998
Selma Y. <selmay@tenet.edu>, San Antonio, TX
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THE QUESTION:
R232: Recently on public radio the president of the Berlin Academy of the Arts said a Holocaust Memorial shouldn’t be built because it would stir up anti-Semitism. I am curious how intense German Americans think current anti-Semitism is.
POSTED MAY 2, 1998
Tim G., 24 <gilmoret@bellsouth.net>, Jacksonville, FL
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THE QUESTION:
R231: What does the average black person think of Louis Farrahkan?
POSTED MAY 2, 1998
Woody, 40, white male, Long Island, NY
(Director’s Note: Y? is posting this question in the spirit it was asked – to gain information from black people about what they think of Louis Farrahkan – and not as a means to begin a lengthy debate between the races on the merits or value of Farrahkan and his teachings. As we have stated in our overview page, the forum has not been designed as a place to debate major political issues.)

ANSWER 1:
I think Minister Farrakhan is a great leader. Although I don’t agree with everything he says, I feel he has some great ideas and also teaches self-empowerment and dependency to his Muslim followers, blacks and specifically black men (who have it the hardest in this country). He is often misunderstood and shown negatively by the media, but I think if people listened to him, they would see what he truly is and has to offer, and learn from the truth and knowledge he speaks. That’s what this “average” black person thinks.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
T.S., 26, African-American female <auset2be@aol.com>, Largo, MD

FURTHER NOTICE:
I think Minister Farrakhan has a blunt and direct way of telling the truth. He tells the truth without regard to the feelings of white America. Sometimes I wonder whether the “traditional” black leaders represent me or white folks. I think the man is a genius, and he has more guts than most “traditional” black leadership. I also believe he is not any more confrontational than Newt Gingrich and Pat Buchanan. I wish more black men had the courage and the conviction of a Louis Farrakhan.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
Wanda, 27, black female, Detroit, MI

FURTHER NOTICE 2:
While I do not agree with everything Minister Farrahkan has had to say in the past on different issues, I believe he can speak intelligently to many issues. I also think his knowledge makes most white people nervous.
POSTED MAY 4, 1998
Janet B., 32, Capitol Heights, MD

FURTHER NOTICE 3:
I believe he is a very sincere individual who believes he is doing the right thing in advancing the black culture of America. Unfortunately, I think he is also misleading a lot of individuals through emotional appeal and “feel good” messages that don’t lend themselves to intellectual independence. I listen to him, and he is very entertaining (probably learned that from his early days as a singer). But I believe he philosophically presents himself in the same fashion as our federal government: “Trust me, I know what is best for you.” A preacher for sure, but I would have questions about calling him a trustworthy leader of the black race in America.
POSTED JUNE 13, 1998
Dave O., 32, daveo1@aol.com, Washington, D.C.

FURTHER NOTICE 4:
Louis Farrakhan does not represent me. He is abrasive and off-putting to me, an African American. As a matter of fact, I am disillusioned with the majority of the media-anointed “black leaders.” Our real leaders are the men and women in our many individual communities who work tirelessly to cure what ails us. They do not often get the credit, though one notable exception was the cover story a national magazine did recently about ministers helping with crime problems. These people are in the trenches and have done more collectively than Farrakhan or any of the other media darlings can ever hope to do.
POSTED AUG. 9, 1998
Diane, 44, African American, Durham, NC
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