Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences 
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Your question is so very much appreciated. It’s one I seldom hear. The answer is very simple: Recognize that African-American people are just that – people, too. Just as we are seldom inclined to lump all Caucasians into one group – sharing all tastes, interests, strengths, weaknesses and personal attributes – we should try to be aware whenever we are doing just that when referring to African Americans. We all come into this world as individuals; though we might share a similar skin shade or similar history, each of us have different perspectives on life, different values, interests, social and financial statuses and ambitions.
When you come into contact with an African American, try to make your mind a ‘tabla rasa’ – a blank slate. Forget whatever stereotypes you’ve learned and explore the individual standing in front of you. Find out what he or she likes and dislikes, and what his or her history and perspectives are. If they appear different from yours, find out why the person sees things differently from you.
Only if we begin to learn authentically about one another can we begin to minimize the destructiveness we all experience in our society as a result of stereotypes.
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Name : Susan Pizarro-Eckert, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Multiracial--SHOCKED that's not an option here!, Religion : Unitarian, Age : 33, City : Brightwaters, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : Personal/Business Coach, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,Dear Chrissy, I too, like you, am of multiracial heritage. I have brown skin, full lips, and an athletic figure (read–bigger than your average rail thin woman). Throughout my life I have attracted the fairest of mean–one serious boyfriend was of norwegian descent and had white blond eybrows, lashes, and hair. We were quite a couple! I remember thinking when he asked me out, ‘he must be joking.’ We dated for five years. I think once white men got to know me they were intrigued by me–Once they saw that I didn’t fit into any particular boxes, they were curious–and got to know me. This opened the door for other things. I tend to be a reserved, introspective person–which always lends itself to mystery I think. So that might be part of it too. But, overall my response to you is, as I’m sure you know, that not all people of any background ever fall into one category–so all white men, for example do not share one taste in women. If you have white male friends, ask them their opinion directly! See what they say. Have fun.
User Detail :
Name : Susan Pizarro-Eckert, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Multiracial--SHOCKED that's not an option here!, Religion : Unitarian, Age : 33, City : Brightwaters, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : Personal/Business Coach, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,Dear Lori–first, I applaud your awareness and openness. In response to your question about whether or not there is anything else you need to know, I would ask you to reflect, if you haven’t already, on what your motivations might be for pursuing a friendship with this black woman. Is it solely because you have never had a black friend before? Or, is it because there is something you genuinely like about this woman–that you would like to get to know her? If it’s the former, explore your reaction to the second question. If it’s the latter, then perhaps you could share these things with her. SOME black Americans have a trust issue with whites–maybe from having been burned too many times before. So, she may question your motivation. No one likes to be a TOKEN black friend. Good luck and have a good summer.
User Detail :
Name : Susan Pizarro-Eckert, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Multiracial--SHOCKED that's not an option here!, Religion : Unitarian, Age : 33, City : Brightwaters, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : Personal/Business Coach, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,Dear Cantley, Your question is so very much appreciated. It’s one I seldom hear. The answer too, is really very simple: Recognize that African-American people are just that–people too. Just as we are seldom inclined to lump all Caucasians into one group–sharing all tastes, interests, strengths, weaknesses, and personal attributes, we should try to be aware whenever we are doing just that when referring to African-Americans. We all come into this world as individuals–though we might share a similar skin shade, or a similar history, each of us have different perspectives on life, different values, different interests, different social and financial statuses, different ambitions. Whenever you come into contact with an African-American–try to make your mind a ‘tabla rasa’–a blank slate. Forget whatever stereotypes you’ve learned and EXPLORE that individual standing in front of you. Find out what HE/SHE likes, does not like, what HIS/HER history and perspectives are. If they appear different from yours, INQUIRE–find out why HE/SHE sees things differently from you. Also–encourage others to do the same! Don’t be a silent bystander to ignorance, racism and oppression. If you say nothing–you allow it to continue! Only if we begin to learn authentically about one another, can we begin to minimize the destructiveness we all experience in our society as a result of stereotypes. Best wishes!
User Detail :
Name : Susan Pizarro-Eckert, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Multiracial--SHOCKED that's not an option here!, Religion : Unitarian, Age : 33, City : Brightwaters, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : Personal/Business Coach, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,
