Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences
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Good news–you may have social anxiety, a condition that is quite treatable. Or social anxiety might be exacerbating your physical problem.
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Name : Jane, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 54, City : Greensboro, State : NC, Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,That must be a little scary. But take heart. If you’re nervous that a man won’t give you a shot because he’s afraid of your disability, just think about it this way: a really nice guy isn’t going to reject you over something like that. I think the bigger obstacle is going to be your self-confidence. If you’re afraid of spilling something and embarassing yourself, I’m wondering if you go out much with friends or family. If not, give it a try! Go somewhere informal and fun, where a glass getting knocked over isn’t that big a deal. You need to get to a point where you believe that you’re a good catch, because confidence is sexy. And face it, you have a lot to be confident about. You have a college degree, which makes you smarter than average; you’re an entrepreneur, which makes you ambitious and brave; you’re attractive, and you’re still young. You have more going for you than a lot of women out there. Oh, and be open to meeting men in situations other than the standard ‘singles scene.’ Martinis in Manhattan sounds so shallow to me… maybe not the best place to meet the nice guy you’re looking for. Meet friends of friends, pick up some hobbies, go volunteer.
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Name : Cecilia, Gender : F, Age : 34, City : Austin, State : TX, Country : United States, Social class : Middle class,As long as you’re comfortable talking about it with others, I don’t see too much of a problem here. I know it’s not the same thing, really, but I have this thing with my teeth (I’m not certain what it’s called) where both my cuspids come out the side of the gum, above and in front of my other teeth. This makes me look a little strange when I talk because I’m always trying to cover them with my upper lip, but I can’t hide them when I smile. So I just mention it to people when I feel they’ve noticed, maybe make a light joke about having ‘fangs’, then casually shift the conversation to another topic. That way, neither of us is uncomfortable. Granted, my problem is something small that can be corrected with relative ease, but I don’t think your problem is really all that different. We all have things that we get self-concious about, albeit to varying degrees. So if you realize someone noticing it, just say something about it and let it go. As long as you are confident with yourself, everything else will fall into place… especially when it comes to dating. And anyone who can’t accept that as part of you isn’t really the type of person anyone should be dating.
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Name : Michael, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Existential Nilhist, Age : 29, City : Canton, State : OH, Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Social class : Lower class,My hands shake too, although I don’t think as bad as yours, but people notice sometimes. My mother is a lifelong nurse and has almost completed schooling for massage therapy. She advises me to massage my hands and forearms when it gets bad. What I have is idiomatic hand tremors (which means they don’t know what causes it) and it runs in my family. I’m always up front when people say things like ‘your hands are shaking.’ Don’t treat it as a big deal and other people won’t; they will like you (or sometimes not) for the person you are. Maybe you should stick to bottled beer, if your concerned about spilling drinks when your out
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Name : Sean B., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Religion : Just very spiritual, Age : 24, City : Annapolis, State : MD, Country : United States, Occupation : Retired College Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,First, please realize that there are no perfect people. Everyone has some physical thing about them that is less than ideal — whether it’s the ‘tremble’ you describe, or a less-than-perfect figure, a large nose, lack of an arm, or whatever. Even the photos of models in magazines are airbrushed to make them look better. A friend of mine has MS and has to wear leg braces, walks with an ‘odd’ gait and cannot lift heavy things. It didn’t stop her from marrying and having (and raising) two children. I suggest getting involved in activities you enjoy — you will meet people with similar interests, and later may develop a relationship with a ‘nice guy.’ Because you will be involved in the activity, not a ‘date,’ you and the people you meet will have something to focus on other than your trembling hands. Be open about the problem with anyone who asks or needs to know. At first, focus on making friends, not boyfriends. Ask your new friends to join you for lunch or a movie or whatever social activities you enjoy. Become comfortable with yourself and with whatever accommodations you need in any given social situation — at a restaurant, you might ask for a cup with a lid (most have them on hand for kids and will be happy to bring it for you, too). Later you may meet, or your friends may introduce you to, that ‘special guy’ you are seeking. By then, you will be more comfortable with yourself and the accommodations you need, and can focus on whether this guy is good to you, instead of on whether he will dislike you for your disability. Always remember, if someone truly dislikes you solely because of this slight physical problem, they are not good enough for you.
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Name : JoAnn, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Episcopalian, Age : 39, City : Tempe, State : AZ, Country : United States, Occupation : attorney, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Most men would probably be honored to go out on a date. Even if you do spill something, they probably won’t mind. Being with an attractive woman is, talking is going to be more than enough distraction for them. Be yourself, and if you feel comfortable with the guy, share your story with him on the second or third date. If they aren’t understanding, you don’t need them anyway.
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Name : Martin22161, Gender : M, City : San Francisco, State : CA, Country : United States,
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