Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences
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Thank you so much for understanding. Actually, my problem is not as bad as I described it. It’s not even noticible. My problem is more of a ‘jerk’ or ‘twitch’ and not even that. Don’t laugh, but if I see a full glass in front of me, that’s when I feel scared. I can’t pick up the full glass, I will spill it. I know, order drinks that come with straws… nowadays they all do. I guess I will have to find ways to work around the issue. I’m SO tired of allowing this to control my life. I’ve missed out on SO many things, I’ve lost SO many friendships, all because I felt ‘too embarrassed.’ I’m still young so I will try to be as positive as I can. Yoga, huh? I have these stress balls I bought from sports stores that I try to exersice with. I guess time helps and I will try to do my best. Thank you all.
User Detail :
Name : Anna23815, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Orthodox Christian, Age : 27, City : Staten island, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : Entrepreneur, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,You sound like a very confident young lady. Kudos! My advice… think of those who have it worse than you… get yourself out there… and just ask for a straw. Your self-esteem will take care of the rest.
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Name : Cindy31941, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 30, City : Appleton, State : WI, Country : United States, Occupation : Technology, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Anna, I consider myself a nice guy. I remember birthdays. On occasion I bring my wife flowers. She has stayed married to me for 13 years and we share 2 wonderful children. As a nice guy I must tell you that this is a minor thing and you should not let it hold you back. If you meet a man who interest you just tell him about it upfront. If he is a nice guy he will carry your tray for you when the nerves are going. If he is not a nice guy then just move on. There are many, many single men who have their own insecurities, but want a loving relationship nonetheless. Furthermore, don’t be afraid to make the first move. Take a chance. Life is short. Oh, one more thing. When I met my wife she was a model. Literally. She modeled for car and beauty magazines. I was a 6′, 250-pound “big man”. I don’t think of myself as a bad looking guy, but I’m no Ken Doll, either. Point is, the nicest LOOKING guy may not be the nicest guy!
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Name : Tony H., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Bahai Faith, Age : 32, City : Las Cruces, State : NM, Country : United States, Occupation : Cabinet shop owner, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Are you sure you aren’t suffering from social anxiety? Do your hands tremble only in social situations? If so, stress reduction techniques may help.
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Name : Lynn22507, Gender : F, Age : 43, City : Omaha, State : NE, Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,The right, nice guy won’t care one bit that you tremble. Get out there. He’s looking for you, too. Have you tried one of the online dating services? They usually give you a long ‘talking time’ prior to being able to have a face-to-face date so you usually know up front whether or not the person is a good match for you. People that are caring don’t care about things like trembling hands. And, have you thought about using bar straws and sipping through them without touching the glass? What about gripping with both hands, in opposition to each other? Would that mute the tremble? Finally, bottles of beer or even the new exotic vodka mixes are very hard to shake or spill with a tremble.
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Name : JW, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 55, City : Tulsa, State : OK, Country : United States, Occupation : Scientist, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I’ve got the same or a very similar problem. One doctor told me it was an intention tremor, and that it will stop upon making contact with the object I wish to carry. Like a cup of coffee. So OK, it’s a good thing that my wife is always around after I spill whatever it is I’m carrying. The cure? Use two hands. And, it can be done graciously without drawing unwanted attention. In my case, it cut the problen down by at least 90 percent.
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Name : Mike, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Jewish, Age : 73, City : Tokyo, State : FL, Country : Japan, Occupation : interpreter, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I wonder how noticeable the tremor becomes. I, too, have a similar problem, which some neurologists have chosen to call an ‘essential tremor.’ (As an aside, I do not know what is so darn essential about it)! If you have had the tremor for long, you already know ways to compensate for it — hold drinks in the non-trembling hand, hold the podium if speaking publicly, or avoid the situation. I would suggest standing or sitting near a table or some other place to put your drink (but don’t leave it unattended, especially in a bar). Socialize and go back to take a drink when needed. Another question: if you drink, does alcoholic beverages slow the tremor? My tremor is on my right side and it gets more pronounced when I am under stress — from public speaking, physical exertion, even getting angry. I have gotten the snide comments from people about being nervous or scared, even in my forum — a courtroom. Above all, user the pre-emptive strike. Acknowledge the fact that you have the trembling and get it out of the way. Develop a sense of humor about it. I have been happily married for almost nine years and my wife and her best friend kid around about it — calling me ‘Shaky,’ etc. If the guy can not get past something that is part of you, he will not get past much and is not worth pursuing. Do not settle.
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Name : Jeff, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 37, City : Warren, State : MI, Country : United States, Occupation : Attorney, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class,A friend of mine once dated a lady with no arms. She always wore a cape to avoid stares. She was a very confident woman and a joy to be around. Shyness is a whole issue apart from the cerebral hypoxia. Work on that, and you will find people will soon stop noticing your hands and accept you as you are. You wouldn’t really care to be around those judging people, anyway, but now you’re missing out on all the other great people, too. There are lots of help books on shyness.
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Name : George-B, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 45, City : Louisville, State : KY, Country : United States, Occupation : Consultant, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper class,I think it’s great that, in spite of CH, you still think of yourself as a ‘very attractive girl.’ Whether a guy [or gal] is ‘nice’ or not can usually be seen in whether or not they care about others more than themselves. To put it another way… all guys who treat women badly have this in common: they’re basically selfish. Get busy serving others and while you’re there look for a single guy who cares more about other people than himself. You’ll get to observe him dealing with difficult situations and people too.
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Name : Dudley, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 52, City : Knoxville, State : TN, Country : United States, Occupation : Computer Programmer, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I feel that it’s your personality, your character, your attitude that determines if you’ll find the right guy. And if he is really Mr. Right, he would accept you irrespective of a problem, which, can be cured. There’s nothing that love can’t cure. So go out socialize.I think the more you think consciously about it the more it’ll persist, so just chill. I get nervous when I go out on a date for the first couple of times, but as I get to know the person better, I am totally at ease. I guess everyone is , to some extent, not comfortable with strangers. So I’d say, stop treating this as a disease and rather as a personality trait that can be turned around.
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Name : Avi, Gender : M, Age : 25, City : na, State : NA, Country : India,Unfortunately one constant about the human race is our ability to be cruel. No matter what it is that is different there will be someone who will ridicule. The trick is not caring about the jerks and concentrate on the nice people. Start with your friends at work, school or church. As you become comfortable being around them with your trembling slowly work out to new situations. Don’t let little setbacks get you down. When you meet some guy that seems nice let him know what’s going on. If he’s worth anything he will understand and it won’t make any difference. Don’t lose heart, there are still some good guys.
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Name : Bill, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : Epilepsy, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 49, City : Dry Ridge, State : KY, Country : United States, Occupation : Informations Systems Manager, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,A member of my family also has a very hoarse voice due to surgery. The biggest problems as a listener are 1.) it sounds uncomfortable and 2) it’s hard to read any expression into it. Any advice for the ones who are listening? We don’t want to make a difficult situation worse.
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Name : Ann P, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 58, City : Atlanta, State : GA, Country : United States, Occupation : business, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,Your nice guy isn’t at a bar unless you want to be railed in the butt and told he will be there for you as he slips out the window with bedsheets and a broken-down Buick SkyLark. My suggestion is: go to the bars to let your hair down, enjoy your work, and have fun. Somewhere we’ll cross paths.
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Name : Mike, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 27, City : Chicago, State : IL, Country : United States, Occupation : Standup Comediean, Writer, Web Comic Producer, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I have the same type of tremor, mine is called ‘essential Tremor’ in the medical lingo. Mine is treatable by using a drug called ‘Propranolol’ (Generic) or ‘Inderal’ (trade name). It works well for me, but talk to your doctor and ask for a prescription if He/She says it might work in your case. I cannot put a spoon in my mouth without it. It works well for most of the day and if I am going to a party, I save part of it (2 tablets per day) for the afternoon. Hope this helps you. (BTW) I have had mine most of my life – it is not age related.
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Name : Jim L, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Baptist, Age : 64, City : Burlington, State : NC, Country : United States, Occupation : Tool & Die Maker, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Middle class,Not having a noticeable handicap is difficult. I’m sure you feel compelled to define your condition immediately in social settings. Bad move. Have a sense of humor about spilt drinks or whatever. I’m sure you have other qualities (character) as well as good looks. Let someone discover them and you’ll realize your condition isn’t a handicap. So get out and enjoy yourself. Spill a drink on a cute guy.
User Detail :
Name : Mike S, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 48, City : Amherst, State : MA, Country : United States, Occupation : HandyMan, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,
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