Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences - This topic has 35 replies, 36 voices, and was last updated 18 years, 4 months ago by
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I feel that it’s your personality, your character, your attitude that determines if you’ll find the right guy. And if he is really Mr. Right, he would accept you irrespective of a problem, which, can be cured. There’s nothing that love can’t cure. So go out socialize.I think the more you think consciously about it the more it’ll persist, so just chill. I get nervous when I go out on a date for the first couple of times, but as I get to know the person better, I am totally at ease. I guess everyone is , to some extent, not comfortable with strangers. So I’d say, stop treating this as a disease and rather as a personality trait that can be turned around.
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Name : Avi, Gender : M, Age : 25, City : na, State : NA, Country : India,Anna, I consider myself a nice guy. I remember birthdays. On occasion I bring my wife flowers. She has stayed married to me for 13 years and we share 2 wonderful children. As a nice guy I must tell you that this is a minor thing and you should not let it hold you back. If you meet a man who interest you just tell him about it upfront. If he is a nice guy he will carry your tray for you when the nerves are going. If he is not a nice guy then just move on. There are many, many single men who have their own insecurities, but want a loving relationship nonetheless. Furthermore, don’t be afraid to make the first move. Take a chance. Life is short. Oh, one more thing. When I met my wife she was a model. Literally. She modeled for car and beauty magazines. I was a 6′, 250-pound “big man”. I don’t think of myself as a bad looking guy, but I’m no Ken Doll, either. Point is, the nicest LOOKING guy may not be the nicest guy!
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Name : Tony H., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Bahai Faith, Age : 32, City : Las Cruces, State : NM, Country : United States, Occupation : Cabinet shop owner, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,First, please realize that there are no perfect people. Everyone has some physical thing about them that is less than ideal — whether it’s the ‘tremble’ you describe, or a less-than-perfect figure, a large nose, lack of an arm, or whatever. Even the photos of models in magazines are airbrushed to make them look better. A friend of mine has MS and has to wear leg braces, walks with an ‘odd’ gait and cannot lift heavy things. It didn’t stop her from marrying and having (and raising) two children. I suggest getting involved in activities you enjoy — you will meet people with similar interests, and later may develop a relationship with a ‘nice guy.’ Because you will be involved in the activity, not a ‘date,’ you and the people you meet will have something to focus on other than your trembling hands. Be open about the problem with anyone who asks or needs to know. At first, focus on making friends, not boyfriends. Ask your new friends to join you for lunch or a movie or whatever social activities you enjoy. Become comfortable with yourself and with whatever accommodations you need in any given social situation — at a restaurant, you might ask for a cup with a lid (most have them on hand for kids and will be happy to bring it for you, too). Later you may meet, or your friends may introduce you to, that ‘special guy’ you are seeking. By then, you will be more comfortable with yourself and the accommodations you need, and can focus on whether this guy is good to you, instead of on whether he will dislike you for your disability. Always remember, if someone truly dislikes you solely because of this slight physical problem, they are not good enough for you.
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Name : JoAnn, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Episcopalian, Age : 39, City : Tempe, State : AZ, Country : United States, Occupation : attorney, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Good news–you may have social anxiety, a condition that is quite treatable. Or social anxiety might be exacerbating your physical problem.
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Name : Jane, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 54, City : Greensboro, State : NC, Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,First of all, there are plenty of men out there for you. As a well educated, very attractive woman in your 20’s, the only thing holding you back is fear, not other people. Secondly, you should seek medical advice. You might benefit from anti-anxiety medication, an antidepressant or a beta blocker. Beta blockers are useful for some types of tremor and also for ‘performance anxiety’ or ‘stage fright.’ Last of all, look for men in classes, at work, in church, in structured activities on weekends and ask your friends to introduce you to men. I don’t recommend bars.
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Name : James W., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 40, City : Denver, State : CO, Country : United States, Occupation : Physician, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Most men would probably be honored to go out on a date. Even if you do spill something, they probably won’t mind. Being with an attractive woman is, talking is going to be more than enough distraction for them. Be yourself, and if you feel comfortable with the guy, share your story with him on the second or third date. If they aren’t understanding, you don’t need them anyway.
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Name : Martin22161, Gender : M, City : San Francisco, State : CA, Country : United States,
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