Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences By PHILLIP MILANO
Question
When I moved to Georgia I was shocked at the presumption of my co-workers and neighbors questioning me about my religion. Why are Southern Christians so nosy? I also noticed a chill after revealing I wasn’t interested in going to their church.
Mary, 42, agnostic, Atlanta
Replies
Welcome to the South! I have had many people try to get me to their church to be “saved.” I have my own religious beliefs and understand what you mean when there is a chill. I have experienced this many times when I reveal I am Catholic.
Kris B., Knoxville, Tenn.
The Bible tells us we should tell others about Jesus in a gentle way.
Aimee, 51, Pentecostal, Jacksonville
It’s an insult if you tell someone in the South you don’t want to go to church with them. It makes it seem as though you dislike them . . . that they are not good enough to socialize with.
Shevronyouna, 20, Cleveland, Miss.
For the record, I don’t think bad about any of you at all. The way you live your life is your business, and I don’t look down on anyone who doesn’t live their life like I do as a Christian, because no one is perfect.
Bradford, Tupelo, Miss.
Christians believe when a person dies he goes to heaven or hell. They don’t want anyone to go to hell, so they are distressed when people don’t want to talk about religious matters.
Rob, Jacksonville
Christianity plays a big role in the South. Asking you about your religion is part of being polite and welcoming. Someone who won’t discuss their religion, therefore, is seen as rude and may be given the Southern version of the cold shoulder.
Shelly, 49, New Age, New Alexandria, Pa.
Expert says
Don’t think of it as Christians being nosy – think of it as you being honored, said the Rev. Jerry Vines, former president of the Southern Baptist Convention and retired pastor of First Baptist Church in Jacksonville.
“I think it’s a great compliment to this individual [to be asked her faith] because it means her fellow worker who is Christian loves her enough to talk about spiritual things,” said Vines, who now heads Jerry Vines Ministries (JerryVines.com).
That’s no license to go all hard-sell on anybody, though.
“Christians should be as tasteful about the way they approach people as possible. I don’t think people should be verbally abused and assailed on a constant basis.”
OK . . . but what about the perception that Southerners really home-in on religion?
“In the South, we’ve perhaps heard the Gospel of Christ more than other parts of the country. I guess it gives them a bit of a fresher or more earnest approach.”
That approach is all about learning whether a person knows about Christ.
“But, it’s a gentler approach to [first] invite people to your church,” Vines said. “Most Christians understand this is our great commission . . . to spread the Good News.”
And yes, he did ask.