- This topic has 5 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 21 years, 10 months ago by Pookie.
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- November 8, 2001 at 12:00 am #9311
RustyParticipantI have noticed over the years that young black women do not make eye contact with me. I can be walking in a mall or parking lot and give a nod and good morning to a passing person, but young black women ignore me. Even young black store clerks many times tend to look somewhere over and past my shoulder. Curiosity finally getting the better of me, I asked Denyse, a black woman I've worked with for 20 years, about it. She took on an attitude I've never seen in her. She said: 'They dissin' you. They ain't gotta look at yo ass and they just lettin' you know it. You ain't nothin' to them.' Then she asked, 'You too dumb to know that?'Now, I've always thought Denyse and I had been pretty tight, but her explanation and attitude leave even more questions.
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Name : Rusty, Gender : M, City : Newport, State : KY Country : United States, November 14, 2001 at 12:00 am #22700
JenniferParticipantRusty, I don't know that your co-worker Denyse can speak for all of the young black women you've encountered. Maybe her explanation fits for some of them, but there are likely as many explanations as there are encounters. I was raised to return a smile for a smile, and a greeting for a greeting, with one caveat: If you get a sense that someone (a man) is leering rather than smiling, or greeting you in order to engage in a conversation you don't care to have, you either ignore him or give a very subtle aknowledgment of his greeting and keep moving.Further, in this day and age, I think many people have grown suspicious of kindness. We don't expect, or encourage, interaction with strangers the way we may have in times past. Could any of this explain what you are experiencing?
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Name : Jennifer, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 31, City : St. Paul, State : MN Country : United States, Occupation : Non-Profit, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, November 19, 2001 at 12:00 am #19939
PatrickParticipantBlack people in general have a lot of hate for white people. They read into what we say for racism and so I constantly need to watch my words. Do you honestly care if I say nigger? or would you prefer to hear the uncensored version? I got many niggers as friends, and many are cool, but there is a large portion of niggers that got so much hate out for white people and are just looking for an excuse to manifest it. I put up with reverse racism a lot, I can understand how racism would be much worse, but its no reason to hate all white people. it pains me to see black people with so much potential squandering their lives just because they can't get along with white people. If they loose the hate, society will be much more accepting...User Detail :
Name : Patrick, Gender : M, Race : Irish, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 18, City : Los Altos, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Upper middle class, February 10, 2002 at 12:00 am #29580
PookieParticipantYou must have been surprised to receive that response from someone you worked with for so long, who you probably thought was your friend. It might be difficult, but I would suggest sitting down with her sometime and asking her why she responded the way she did. Living with racism may have caused her to feel frustrated with questions such as the one you posed, hence the 'you too dumb to know that?' remark. However, I think you asked a legitimate question, and I think a legitimate question deserves an answer.User Detail :
Name : Pookie, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 28, City : Bristol, State : IN Country : United States, Occupation : court reporter, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, May 8, 2002 at 12:00 am #22576
Godz21524ParticipantSOMETIMES IT DEPENDS ON WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE. I WAS VERY SELECTIVE WHEN IT CAME TO MEN (BEFORE I MARRIED). JUDGING FROM YOUR CO-WORKER'S RESPONSE, YOU MUST BE VERY ATTRACTIVE. SOMETIMES, WOMEN ARE INTIMIDATED BY THAT IF THEY DONT SEE THEMSELVES AS ATTRACTIVE. ALSO, YOU CAN BE SO ATTRACTIVE THAT THE ATTITUDE IS LIKE THAT OF YOU CO-WORKER; 'HE PROBABLY THINKS THAT HE IS 'ALL THAT' SO I MUST LET HIM KNOW DIFFERENTLY'.User Detail :
Name : Godz21524, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 28, City : Kidd, State : GA Country : United States, Social class : Upper middle class, July 23, 2002 at 12:00 am #24821
tonya24184ParticipantIf I was walking in a mall and a white man said hello i would say hello back but i would be confused. baiscally there what the hell is wrong with that guy. it does not mean that they are racist it just mean there not use to white men(especially white middle age men in suits) acknowledgeing them.User Detail :
Name : tonya24184, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 17, City : brooklyn, State : NY Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,  - AuthorPosts
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