Why avoid us?

Viewing 13 posts - 1 through 13 (of 13 total)
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  • #32761

    Shari-D
    Participant
    I think it is natural for people to feel a bit awkward in situations that are unusual to them. I went to a college with a relatively large population of hearing-impaired students, and got very used to seeing sign language in class and out. I still "stare" at it (though I'd call it "watching"), not because I think it's strange, but because it fascinates me. I know a very small amount of sign language and would like to learn more. Perhaps some of the people you see staring are just watching, too.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Shari-D, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 28, City : Canton, State : MI Country : United States, Occupation : Teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #9469

    E-Henry25520
    Participant
    I'm a deaf girl who has grown up around hearing people. One thing I have noticed is that hearing people tend to have an uncomfortable or awkward time around deaf people and stare while we sign. Why is that? Is it because you are afraid to contract deafness? We are willing to make an effort to communicate on our part, so why don't you?

    User Detail :  

    Name : E-Henry25520, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : Deaf, Age : 19, City : Steamboat Springs, State : CO Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 
    #46252

    Meriam-F
    Participant
    When I have seen people signing, I couldn't help but try and sneak a look because I find sign language really fascinating and beautiful to watch. I don't know about other people's reasons, and granted it is rude to stare at other people's conversations, but for me it isn't because I am afraid or hostile; it is only admiration of another type of speach.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Meriam-F, City : San Francisco, State : CA Country : United States, 
    #42445

    Angee
    Participant
    I used to stare at deaf people the few times I saw them. But that was because I was genuinely interested in learning more about signing. As fate would have it, my fiance is fluent in sign. His parents are deaf and his stepfather is deaf, so he's known sign since he was just a little kid. Now, I have someone to help me become more fluent in signing. I'm not very good at it, but the few people I've signed to seemed to enjoy my attempts. But I wouldn't think too much of the people that stare; they probably are curious about sign language and find it just as interesting as I do.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Angee, Gender : F, Age : 24, City : Clarksville (Ft. Campbell, KY), State : TN Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, 
    #16880

    Mel W.
    Participant
    I have always stared because I love sign language and have been trying to learn it. By watching people sign, I'm learning more about signing, the way people learn Spanish or French by listening to it. Also, just as with some people learning French or Spanish, I don't feel very comfortable using the language around people who speak it fluently and prefer just to watch. Don't always assume that when a hearing person stares at you it's because they are thinking something negative or ignorant. They might just be watching and learning.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Mel W., Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 20, City : Gunnison, State : CO Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 
    #27694

    Marcia22185
    Participant
    I second Meriam. I don't stare because it's rude, but I watch a little out of the corner of my eye because it's fascinating and beautiful.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Marcia22185, Gender : F, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, 
    #28322

    Jim30720
    Participant
    Rather than being offended - The next time I stare, invite me to join the conversation to learn. We'll both gain. I had no idea that I was in the majority until I read the prior responses.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Jim30720, Gender : M, City : Columbia, State : SC Country : United States, 
    #15266

    Beth23172
    Participant
    Why avoid us? What a strange subject line for someone who objects being looked at! Sign language is lovely to watch, and those who are deaf all their lives have the most animated faces - you can almost understand conversations just from watching a deaf persons face.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Beth23172, City : Anchorage, State : AK Country : United States, 
    #27455

    P.L.G.
    Participant
    I live around a lot of people who speak Spanish all the time. I don't know any Spanish. When they are talking around me I get uncomfortable. I don't know what is being said. I would imagine sign language would have a similar problem. I don't learn Spanish because I know I would have to start as a beginner and I hate to be laughed at. I would imagine the same applies to sign language.

    To me it is very interesting that the original question didn't say "staring" anywhere but all the answers did. I wonder if they were admitting guilty feelings.

    User Detail :  

    Name : P.L.G., Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, City : Portales, State : NM Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, 
    #24971

    Samantha29426
    Participant
    I'm sure I'm not speaking for most of the people who seem uncomfortable around the disabled, but I tend to avoid starting conversations with disabled people because I tend to avoid starting them with anybody. I'm very shy, and people with disabilities seem to make me more so because I worry that they might think I'm ignoring them because they're disabled, or if I try to not look like I'm ignoring them it will seem like I'm staring (yes, I know its silly). It feels like I'm somehow under more pressure when I'm interacting with people with visible disabilities because I worry that my shyness will be assumed to be due to their dissability. I wish I could be more outgoing, but its hard.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Samantha29426, Gender : F, Age : 19, City : Seattle, State : WA Country : United States, Occupation : student, 
    #28750

    Meredith
    Participant
    I am hearing, but I have been signing since I was four. I am not staring because I think I will catch deafness, but because I am listening in ... I shouldn't be eavesdropping. (By the way, Peter G., the original message did say '...and stare while we sign.')

    User Detail :  

    Name : Meredith, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Unitarian Universalist, Age : 19, City : Washington, State : DC Country : United States, Occupation : IT Technician, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #46226
    I am deaf. i love to talk to deaf people when i was grow up around hearing people. I agree with you . most hearing people dont understand what we are talking about. most hearing want know what you say but ' it is not your business ' to hearin people.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Carrie Mccarthy, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : Deaf, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 21, City : Belding, State : MI Country : United States, Occupation : housewife, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 
    #31152

    samantha
    Member
    i used to stare becouse i really wanted tolearn to sign then when i had my little girl i got my chance to learn becouse she was pronounced profoundly deaf at the age of 18 months i have learned so much from her and all her friends at her school i really admire the deaf people of the world becouse of the fact that all of them are so bueatiful and becouse you really have tobe really really smart to sign to other people i sit and watch my little girl and her friends and they are what you call it strong thats it i try to treat my little girl with dignity and treat her no different than i would a hearing child i also have noticed that hearing people act very strange around the deaf most of the time i think it is becouse of ignorance more than anything else

    User Detail :  

    Name : samantha, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : half indian half white, Religion : Wiccan, Age : 35, City : west helena, State : AR Country : United States, Occupation : self employed, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
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