Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences - This topic has 32 replies, 33 voices, and was last updated 19 years, 6 months ago by
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I’ve never had sex because I would like to wait until marriage, but I’m not sure if that’s going to be possible. I have temptations just like any other human being. I want to know if sex is all people say it is. Will it hurt the first time? If so, how much? And are guys picky about pubic hair? Do they prefer it completely hairless?
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Name : Sandy28312, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Los Angeles, State : CA, Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I always wanted to wait for marriage, but being a kid living in an age of sexuality, I gave into temptation. I find that morals are hard to hold onto in this generation. It is completely up to you, but just remember that the chances of finding a mate who is a virgin are slim. Not that I am trying to make you feel hopeless or something, but waiting is always good. However, if you wish to experience sex, I must say it is very exciting. If it is shared with someone you care about but just can’t seem to get married to at the time, it is very pleasant. Just be safe and make sure you don’t do it out of pressure.
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Name : Victor24550, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Religion : Agnostic, Age : 19, City : Chelsea, State : MA, Country : United States, Occupation : Phlebotomist/Student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,your frist will kill you if you not athletic,cause you not use to pain!!! men can get impaniet when it comes to losing your women hood.so be sure when you say you ready mean you ready!!!! shave your pubic hair thats what most men prefer.
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Name : Bunnie, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 15, City : Chattanooga, State : TN, Country : United States, Occupation : basketball/high school, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,Sandy I just want to say I look up to you for being a 22 year old virgin. Please don’t let anyone persuade you otherwise. I don’t see why society as a whole encourage more people to be like you. It is possible to wait until you’re married to have sex I don’t CARE WHAT ANYONE SAY. People like Victor tell you everyday you can’t be a virgin you’re not strong enough, or we’re living in a highly sexualized time but if more people tell young people you CAN instead of YOU CAN’T we wouldn’t have so many illegitimate kids and paternity tests and STD’s running rampant. Don’t worry about what pleases men in general because if you find one right person to marry it will be between you and that person and no one else. You don’t have to be sexually experience because when you marry you’ll have plenty of time to get it right regardless of what anyone says. Congratulations! and don’t feel like you’re missing anything.
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Name : Monique20344, City : ft.myers, State : FL, Country : United States,First, you need to really think about not the act itself, but what happens after the fact …. will you feel guilty because of your upbringing or religion? Are you ready to accept the risk of disease or pregnancy? Will you be hurt because your partner may not be as loving or committed as you would like him to be? When I lost my virginity at the age of eighteen, I did so because I felt that it was expected of me and that it would mean nothing – it was ‘just my body’. Afterwards, I regretted it very much. Assuming that you will be with someone who feels the same way about you that you do about him, first you need to educate yourself. The website of the American Social Health Association has very accurate information about sexually transmitted diseases, which are probably MUCH more common than you think – you don’t have to sleep around to be at risk. There are lots of reliable sources about birth control; make sure you are using it properly. For the sexual act itself, well, my favorite sources is the Good Vibrations Guide to Sex. Silly name, but it has responsible, straightfoward information (www.goodvibes.com). To answer your questions, yes, it will probably hurt. How much depends 1) on the state of your hymen (a thin tissue inside your body) – if you are very physically active, it may even be partly broken already, and 2) how relaxed and physically aroused you are. If you’re not aroused, sex hurts even if you’re not a virgin! Water-based lubricant (oil breaks down condoms) will help. The pain – I can’t describe it very well, as I really haven’t been injured very much in my life. In my experience, the actual pain didn’t last much beyond the experience itself, and then I felt like I had my period for a few days (complete with blood!) Pubic hair – well, don’t worry about your body. Would you go to a dance club and then spend the whole time worrying if your hair was exactly right? If so, you’re just not having a good enough time. It depends on the man. Some men don’t like hairless, it makes them feel like pedophiles. Some don’t like ‘landing strips’, they look silly. Some don’t like hair, it’s messy. Natural is generally the way to go, but then if you want to receive oral sex some men get squeamish. The hair in the mouth thing. Anyway. If you’re not sure about sex, just get yourself a vibrator, they’re more efficient anyway! Men are great, but not worth regrets. Good luck!
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Name : Cathy32449, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 24, City : New York, State : NY, Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,i wish i were in your shoes, knowing what i know now. sex isn’t all its cracked up to be. i mean, it is if you share an emotional bond with your partner. otherwise, for me, it just led to confusion. the relationships always changed after sex became an issue. a good question to ask yourself is ‘is this person special enough for me to share this memory with?’ if not, don’t waste your hymen. does it hurt? yes. any girl who says she orgasms from the first time either is lying or doesnt know what to look for. but it hurts less after a few times. i do recommend that you become familiar with what feels good to you before you have sex. and dont be afraid to voice your wants. about the pubic hair – my husband (and all the others) prefer the ‘landing strip’ the tuft of hair just above your clitoris nicely trimmed – and thats it. shaving or waxing is a pain, but once you get used to it, its like shaving your legs. but if your partner asks u to do it, make sure they do it for you!!! good luck and be sure to listen to your heart & your gut feelings.
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Name : morgan, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Baptist, Age : 23, City : greeley, State : CO, Country : United States, Occupation : housewife, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class,Firstly, what is your reason for wanting to wait until marriage? Do you have a religious moral objection to sex before marriage? Or do you just think it would be cool or romantic? If you think it is immoral to have sex before marriage then that might be good motivation, though I do not agree with that idea. But, if you think it is just cool or romantic, I think you are making a big mistake. Sex is one of the greatest pleasures in life, and regardless of what people say, sex is better when you are young. Not having sex just for the sake of saying you are a virgin is like denying yourself good food or beautiful art for no good reason.
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Name : Lance26203, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 39, City : Chico, State : CA, Country : United States, Occupation : Civil Service, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I really commend you on your choice to wait. Even if you do end up having sex before marriage at least you wanted to wait. The first time I had sex it wasn’t painful but that was because he fingered me first. You have to make sure that you are very turned on and very wet! But if your hymen (a fold of mucous membrane partly closing the orifice of the vagina)hasn’t been broken yet, than it might hurt a little bit or there might be some blood. I have had some friends say it hurt a little bit but it obviously wasn’t that bad otherwise they wouldn’t do it anymore. From my experience guys like it when you are shaved. But it can depend on the guy.
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Name : catie, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Episcopalian, Age : 21, City : yonkers, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : student, Social class : Upper middle class,For some women sex hurts the first time and for others it really doesn’t. It really depends on the woman and her partner. If you have a partner who really cares for you and is willing to take things slow because it is your first time, then it probably wont hurt very much. The pain is not like regular pain anyway because of the sexual arrousal. As for the pubic hair, I think that most men aren’t too worried about it. From what I’ve heard, there are many men who don’t like women to be shaved because it is creepy – like having sex with a child. As long as your hair is neat and tidy you will be fine. When and with whom to have sex is a very personal decision. If you would like to wait until marriage, then you can do that. If you would like to have sex sooner, then you can do that too. It is completely up to you. Personally, I don’t think that virginity makes women any more or less valuable.
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Name : Lucy22385, Gender : F, Age : 28, City : San Jose, State : CA, Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,youve gone 22 years without givin in ,why now do you feel tempted?(22times 365days equals 8,030days of abstinence)each day you are tempted by society ,television ,relationships and a whole lot of other things.but the point is that from the first time you decided that you wouldnt experience sex was hard enough an nw your old enough to find the right one and get married so dont sress your self good luck and keep in mind aoid an environment that temps you
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Name : LW, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : mexican indian ,african ameican,.., Religion : Christian, Age : 16, City : va beach, State : VA, Country : United States, Occupation : student high school, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,Wait until you’re ready for sex, if the person you’re with at the time won’t wait for you or pressures you, then they aren’t for you. The hair question is a personal preference, personally i shave myself and prefer my partner atleast well trimmed
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Name : Brian, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 27, City : Mount Laurel, State : NJ, Country : United States, Occupation : Golf Pro, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I’ve been married almost 30 years to my high school sweet heart. We were both virgins. I would give anything if we both had a little more experience in the ways of pleasing the other. I wish I had had sex with more boys/men. Don’t wait until you’re 50 to realize that sexual experience is necessary to please the one you DO fall in love with. Be careful, though. Aids, Herpes, other diseases are rising by an alarming rate among the youth of this world-heterosexual contact mainly at this point. : )
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Name : PaleRider19850, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Not answered, Disability : Not answered, Race : Not answered, Religion : Methodist, City : Newyork, State : NY, Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Who have you been talking too? Girl what I wouldnot give to be a virgin again. Me and My husband both lost our virginity befor we were married and we deeply regret it. I know it’s not easy and It may hurt a little but sex with someone you love is a beautiful thing. When you have meaningless sex you are looked at differently.
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Name : Fatima, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Pentecostal, Age : 24, City : Twinsburg, State : OH, Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,I wanted to wait too. And I also gave into temptation. Let me tell you: IT’S WORTH WAITING….. Sure, it’s fun, it feels good. But it’s all living in the moment. How can you choose one moment of fun (which probably is going to last only 30 minutes anyway) over the wonderful gift of giving yourself to your husband: untouched and pure. Your anxious. Don’t be. The other thing to remember is that sex should be the EXTRA in the relationship, NOT THE FOUNDATION, and you ought to be more anxious in finding a man that likes what you like and can enjoy spending time with you. BOTTOM LINE: sex is over rated.
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Name : Melinda S., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : --, City : Fairfax, State : VA, Country : United States, Occupation : student, Social class : Middle class,I am not a virgin but I wanted to reply to your question. The first thing you need to have is love. I have had intercourse with men I didn’t really love (at the time I did) but when you have a man who has been your best friend and you love him a lot your sex will mean much much more. You have to find the right partner. The person who cares about you too. The first time will not be very pleasant in feeling ( a little off) but you have to think is this person who I want to experience this with? (think deep) And pubic hair should be your thing on how you want it. Shaving is not that great. Just trim it up. Nobody likes big bushes. Looks unkept and it states a little about you. Men are not that picky some think more like animals. Take Care and Be Smart.
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Name : LinetM, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Religion : Catholic, Age : 21, City : Washington, State : DC, Country : United States, Occupation : Legal Assistant, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,
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