Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences - This topic has 44 replies, 45 voices, and was last updated 18 years, 7 months ago by
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You may really be just a nice guy who has fun with the rap, metal, thug or whatever kind of ‘scene’ you hang out in, but doesn’t it occur to you that anyone who has ‘thug’ in his email address might just project, in person, some kind of low-class vibes that alleged higher-class ‘nice’ girls can pick up on?
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Name : Kevin26328, Gender : M, City : Amarillo, State : TX, Country : United States,I think a lot of rich kids are told by their parents to beware of anyone with less money than them, because they’re only out to get your money. I think this is why a lot of rich girls only date rich guys.
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Name : Taz, Gender : M, Age : 33, City : Detroit, State : MI, Country : United States, Social class : Middle class,This guy hit the nail on the head. We live in a Image driven climate. Women especially are concerened with how other’s perceive them.
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Name : Bruce, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 27, City : Sterling, State : VA, Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Excuse me, but what is the ‘obvious’ answer if the suburban female is white? That she’s a racist? That’s a pretty loaded assumption, considering that you don’t even know what his attitude, pick-up lines, etc are. Sheesh. Just because someone is white doesn’t mean that they’re racist, you know. Maybe his hygeine could use some work, maybe he comes accross as a misogynist, maybe he seems uneducated, maybe he looks sloppy… There’re a thousand and one reasons that may apply, and only one of them is racism. So what is so ‘obvious’ about it?
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Name : Mara, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 40, City : Atlanta, State : GA, Country : United States, Occupation : data entry, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,Most women want a man who can support them. They are high maintenance, you know? They like to dig deep in our pockets. You got to have money these days. Or like that one girl said, hope you look like (Brad Pitt). It is true, though, you have to approach them at the right time and place. Be confident and don’t act desperate. If you come on too strong, that will push’em away. You’ve got to say the right things and be smooth about it. Don’t put your foot in your mouth. Just give them a nice compliment. Ask the woman if she would like to go out sometime. It don’t hurt to ask. Then maybe you can get the digits. So good luck with the ladies.
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Name : Jeff-L, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 27, City : Archdale, State : NC, Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Most women do NOT appreciate men just ‘running up’ on them to chat. Also understand that many of today’s ‘upper income’ women are upper income because they’ve educated themselves and have positions that pay good money. So naturally, a woman who is running from meeting to meeting does not have time for idle chit chat. Second, I get the distinct impression that you’re ‘pushing up’ on white women, exclusively. Do you ever talk to Hispanic women? Maybe you’d get a better response from them. But the truth is, any woman who has it ‘going on’ as respects career/finances, of any ethnicity, is not going to give the time of day to just any old guy, regardless of how cute he may be. Lastly, are you in SOCIAL settings when you’re approaching these women, or on the street? That makes a difference, too. Finally, if you’re so hell-bent on meeting an ‘upper class’ woman, perhaps you’re going to have to do an ‘upgrade’ on yourself, by way of getting educated and landing a nice position at a Fortune 500 Company, with a salary and company perks.
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Name : Rhonda29988, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 42, City : Laurelton, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : Account Rep, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I live in the North Shore in the Chicago area, so I guess you could say I am a rich white boy. Stuck-up North Shore girls are just stuck up by nature. It doesn’t matter whether you’re decent-looking or not, they choose who they hang out with and if you’re not them, well… you’re not them, but trust me, you’re not missing much,
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Name : John29333, Gender : M, City : Wilmette, State : IL, Country : United States,It also has to do with educational level. I was raised in the middle class and education is very important in my family – I am a voracious reader and learner. So if some guy comes up to me and can’t even speak proper English… forget it! Poor English is like listening to fingernails on a blackboard. First of all I don’t like strange guys coming up to me and secondly I would never seriously consider anyone as a mate who wasn’t my intellectual equal. There would also be the problem of not fitting into each other’s spheres. It is also very true what a previous respondent wrote about most women not marrying ‘down’. Most people do marry within their own social class with the exception of beautiful women who marry ‘up’. This is just the way it is, so don’t take it personally. If the woman is upper class she is going to be used to a certain way of life that you could not fit into or provide for her. Having said all this, I do speak from some personal experience. I married a man who is from a lower class but well-educated and my intellectual equal. Dealing with his family, however, is a nightmare.
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Name : Jennifer30884, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 31, City : San Diego, State : CA, Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I’m a middle class white girl, and I will openly admit to acting snobby when a lower class Latino, black or white guy hits on me. When it sounds like ‘hey, pretty, you wanna be my girlfriend’, no, I have a boyfriend ‘so, he don’t gotta know’ and so on and so forth- I’m snobby if they’re acting like they’re cat-calling me, not hitting on me. If they’re polite and don’t talk to my boobs, then I act like I would when any guy hits on me. Now, if you’re polite and they’re still snobs, then they’re probably just that- snobs (who are probably scared of any other ethnicities). There are A LOT of bitchy white girls out there.
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Name : Allison31441, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 19, City : Philadelphia, State : PA, Country : United States, Social class : Middle class,The reason women act ‘snooty’ toward poorer men seems self-explanatory to me. Although physical attraction is a good thing, it is NOT what women are after. The most attractive quality that a man can possess is POWER, power that poor men do not possess. Think about it in terms of biological needs. Men have the luxury of spreading their seed, so they seek the most women and the most attractive women to maximize their potential to reproduce. Women on the other hand can only give birth a few times, so they have to be more choosy. Who do women choose? The man that will best support her and the child, and the man who is the best and would yield the most genetically gifted offspring. People who are rich are usually associated with being intelligent, strong, ambitious, etc; while poor men are obviously just the slaves of the powerful until they themselves become powerful. As to why higher-class women are more choosy than lower-class women, they simply have been around more powerful men their whole lives (like their rich daddies, for example), and usually won’t go down on the social ladder (why would they want to?).
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Name : Freddie, Gender : M, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Age : 20, City : Miami, State : FL, Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Being a black suburban female, I am constantly being called ‘stuck up’. I am married so it’s much easier for me these days, but previously, I had such a difficult time with these ‘stuck up’ accusations. I have dated guys from all different classes…honestly, it doesn’t matter to me. Unfortunately, your class has an influence on so many things…your life experiences, your world view, etc. I feel confident saying that most women want a guy to approach her with respect and sincerity. I don’t want to make stereotypes or prejudices, but I am usually able to determine a guy’s ‘class’ by the way he approaches me or other women. ‘What up shawty’ doesn’t work with me. I tend to ignore it. Just because I am black doesn’t mean I don’t want proper English, roses and expensive dinners. If I were single, I would expect a worthwhile guy to approach me with an introduction and an invite to a proper date. That’s not to say that lower- or middle-class guys are incapable of doing this. That’s not to say all middle- and lower-class males say ‘what up shawty.’ It’s just that my experiences have been that they approach upper-class females the same way they would the females from their neighborhoods and it just doesn’t work. It would be the same scenario if an upper-class male tried to approach a lower-class female. She probably wouldn’t give him the time of day. We aren’t stuck up. We just have different expectations and if you don’t respect them, then of course we won’t want to talk to you. If you can’t respect us from day one, what makes you think that we could ever trust you to respect us later on?
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Name : Cherie, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, City : Chicago, State : IL, Country : United States,I am an upper-class suburban female, and I feel that this attitude is based on environment. Up until recently, when I started college, I lived in a town and attended schools that were 98% white. We all talked the same way, and lacked exposure to diversity. I know I am a bit stand-offish with guys of different races, but to me, they seem more aggressive than the guys I have interacted with previously, and this aggressiveness and a certain ‘accent’ that lower-class people tend to have turns me off.
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Name : Hilary-T, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 20, City : Auburn, State : CA, Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Upper class,They think that way cuz they think they’re better than everybody else in the world. So they stuck-up. They thnk they deserve a guy who is equal or a little bit better than them. They’re like that cuz they think having money requires the best for them. So they have high standards for choosing a guy. They just like that cuz they want to be and they like it that way.
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Name : Marisa, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 15, City : St. Charles, State : IL, Country : United States, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,By using the word ‘girls’ I will assume we’re talking high school age. This is probably the most status-conscious time of human life. It’s an irony: after how much of this time is spent questioning the powers that be, we spend as much if not more imposing the same kind of pressures we are supposedly rebelling against. Women are very much in competition with one another – clothes, men, social circles, etc. It’s the underlying logic for the adage ‘Behind every successful man is a woman’.
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Name : Craig E., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 35, City : Tampa, State : FL, Country : United States, Occupation : Cust Svc. Rep, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class,I think a lot of upper-middle-class suburban white girls are rather insulated — they have not had a lot of experience being around young men who aren’t also upper middle class and white. So it’s entirely possible they are nervous — the only people they’re familiar with who talk the way you might talk, or walk the way you might walk, or move the way you might move, are movie characters…and rarely the hero of the movie. You know how girls tend to marry someone just like Dad? Well, Daddy is a stockbroker. His daughters are used to the speech, values, etc., of the sons of the stockbrokers and attorneys. By values, I’m not referring to whether someone is moral or not, but just that: values — what does the person find a valuable use of time, energy, or finances. A telling question is something like: If you were given a month off of work, and an extra paycheck, what would you do with that time and money? Kids who grew up with Daddy who would put the money in the college trust fund and then spend the month skiing often don’t feel comfortable with someone who would use the money to buy a dirt bike and then spend a month racing it.
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Name : Allison, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Presbyterian, Age : 40, City : Seattle, State : WA, Country : United States, Occupation : Publishing, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,
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