[Phil30401]

Perhaps it is typical of ‘Southern’ speech patterns in the Unted States, but when another person is being referred to directly, the use of the word ‘girl’ is sometimes used, in Afro-American conversation, rather than the person’s name. It seems that the word is used in a friendly context, but to me it seems more personal to refer to the person’s actual name, rather than a word that describes the person’s gender. If intimacy is being attempted, why would the person’s name not be used? Does it have anything to do with the way people were referred to years ago? Why keep such a pattern of speech if another style can be used that identifies the person by name? And why is the origin of this speech pattern from the South? For all the talk of manners, to me, the use of a person’s name is highly respectful.

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Name : Phil30401, Gender : M, City : Pittsburgh, State : PA, Country : United States, 

[ACC25035]

I’ve seen similar things in other places. Latino people commonly say ‘mijo’ or ‘mija’, my boy or my girl, as terms of endearment or to just be friendly, especially if there is a substantial difference in age. (Someone younger would answer back with ‘abuelo’, grandfather, or ‘don’, sir.) For people closer in age, you say ‘carnal’ (pronounced cahr-NAHL) meaning a close blood relative. It seems to me the intent is no different than Christians and blacks calling each other brother and sister or American Indians calling each other cousin. All the terms imply closeness, being related, or familiarity. It seems just as friendly as using a first name. Maybe more so, since anyone can call you by your name, but you have to let someone call you by terms that imply familiarity, or it comes off as condescending or insulting.

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Name : ACC25035, Race : Mexican and American Indian, City : Phoenix, State : AZ, Country : United States, 

[Augustine23558]

I have never particularly noticed this habit in the South, but I think you are starting off with the presupposition that the use of one’s proper name indicates intimacy, and that’s not necessarily true. I think it might be the other way around – feeling comfortable enough around someone else to use a generic or specific nickname. I once had a boss who constantly referred to me as ‘Bubba’ (translated: young Southern male of a certain physical size), and far from being offended, I found it amusing and friendly, and I think that’s how he meant it. If it had been meant as a put-down, I would have picked up on it, and it simply wasn’t there. At this point I am also reminded of the ’70s sitcom ‘Rhoda’ (Jewish family in New York City) where it seemed like everyone was constantly using everyone else’s names in conversation. It’s probably a regional and cultural thing.

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Name : Augustine23558, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 41, City : Columbia, State : SC, Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Jada21044]

You said it: a name is very personal. I find it impolite to use someone’s name in the presence of strangers who could be listening. You never know the intention of strangers. So, out of respect for the person I’m talking to, I don’t call them by name. If I were to holler their name to everybody, that would show that I don’t care who knows them. They know I know their name.

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Name : Jada21044, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : mixed race, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 21, City : Toronto, Ontario, State : NA, Country : Canada, Occupation : Student, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Lower class, 

[Jesse-Metzger]

Maybe you’re just dumb?

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Name : Jesse-Metzger, City : jackasonville, State : FL, Country : United States, 

[Nina]

The term girl is a term of endearment. This is a black and southern trait the use of ‘girl’. Southerners tend to be formal and do not refer to non-intimates by their first name. Its ‘Mrs Jones’ or ‘Miz Cathy’if you are close, and only ‘Cathy’ to very close friends and family. People do not refer to or speak to their elders by first name. Using the term girl is taking it to the other extreme, it implies extreme familiarity. In spanish this is also done, ‘nena’ and ‘chica’ are used among close friends. One you call ‘girl’ is someone who is a peer, an equal and implies a certain intimacy. Many people do not like to be referred to by their names, they feel they are private. So using a persons name isnt neccessarily something they would want or desire. I dislike when sales people or my childrens teachers use my first name in conversations with me. I feel they are being overly familiar. nina

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Name : Nina, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : mulit, Religion : Catholic, Age : 33, City : CS, State : CO, Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

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