[Xot]

Maybe this question has more to do with my own self-confidence or lack thereof, but how does a man meet women who respect themselves? How does one approach a woman in a way that is respectful to them, but still indicates that one might desire to know them better? Furthermore, where does one go to meet such women?

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Name : Xot, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 31, City : Rochester, State : NY Country : United States, Occupation : White-collar wage slave, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Ife]

Wow! I like your questions. Thank goodness; there is hope after all. I have never met men who are interested in women with values/morals. You can meet 'those' types of women almost anywhere: happy-hour, through friends, libraries, movies, church ... and the list goes on. You just have to approach them in a manner that does not insinuate sex or being raunchy. There are lots of women out there who are interested in knowing the inner person; and most women would prefer a friendship/solid relationship to a casual, sex-oriented relationship. Just keep looking for your Ms. Right; you will find her.

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Name : Ife, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 23, City : Miami, State : FL Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : 4 Years of College, 

[Leslie H.]

I think the problem here is that we still lack a meeting place better than bars, which are a terrible place to meet the kind of women you're talking about (same problem with meeting men, I assure you). As a woman, I have trouble meeting self-respecting, 'together' women with whom I can have a friendship. Some people say that church is a good place for meeting, but I see you're atheist, and basically, so am I, so church isn't the answer for us. As for approaching women: Don't you need to find one first? Or do you just like to always be prepared? Hmmm, didn't answer your question, but at least I know that there are other people (at least one) who are in a quandary over where to find the land of perfect mate.

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Name : Leslie H., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 32, City : Cliffside Park, State : NJ Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Nancy20250]

First, high praises to you for asking a question that does not objectify women as sex objects. How you think of women and treat them is very important. Respectful women want to be friends with men and discuss important, non-sex-related issues. Respectful women want to be treated with respect and not gawked at, groped or grabbed. Sex is important in a relationship, but you shouldn't bring it up too soon because respectful women will think you are just after sex. Respectful women don't wear slutty clothes and are often educated and independent. Bookstores, coffee houses, college classes, libraries and political events are a good place to start. Upper-scale bars are probably OK if you don't make a bee line for the girl with the shortest skirt and biggest boobs.

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Name : Nancy20250, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 32, City : Atlanta, State : GA Country : United States, Occupation : sales, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Sharon28104]

Your message really cheered me and was lovely to hear. As you may gather, it's not one many women hear. Sounds to me that your confidence is just right - that you can want to meet a self-respecting woman without feeling threatened yourself by that self-respect. Good for you. It's always difficult to meet new people and strike up contact, so I don't know how to advise there. However, if someone is unintrusively interested in me as a unique person, I naturally feel the same back. I'm sure someone really nice will appreciate your thoughtful and courageous world view. Good luck.

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Name : Sharon28104, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 29, City : Edinburgh, State : NA Country : United Kingdom, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Kerry]

Do things that are of interest to you - hiking groups, reading groups, something where people gather for a purpose. That said, congrats to you for looking for a woman who respects herself.

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Name : Kerry, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Pagan, Age : 29, City : Ventura, State : CA Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

[Jackie]

I have to agree with everyone else; that's a question that people like to hear! As to where to meet women who respect themselves, well, we're scattered everywhere. I'd suggest picking some activity that you enjoy or find interesting, and start attending that. It helps if it's an activity where it's possible to hang out casually with other group members. As to how to approach a woman respectfully: the fact that you're asking this question means you've probably got a decent chance of managing it anyway. Be honest and sincere. Joke playfully with someone if that's the way you usually act, compliment her if you have a genuine compliment to share (esp. if it's something like, 'I appreciated the way you introduced this idea into our discussion,' instead of 'You look really hot!' It can definitely be nice to know that you're attractive to someone else, but it can sometimes come across wrong if you start out with a compliment of the person's physical features), and so on. Ask her questions about herself (about things you're genuinely interested in), and listen to her responses. I could go on, but that hopefully gives you an idea.

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Name : Jackie, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 23, City : Tacoma, State : WA Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

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