[Me21888]

In our (my wife and I) case, the one who's in the mood usually tries to get the other person in the mood through various ways that we've come to learn. If, however, one of us is REALLY not in the mood, then the other one usually helps out by masterbating the other person, or we take care of things ourselves (solo masterbation). There are no hurt feelings. Couples are not always in sync.

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Name : Me21888, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Age : 27, City : SF Bay Area, State : CA Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, 

[Mohammad]

What do couples do when one is 'in the mood' for sex and the other is not?

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Name : Mohammad, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Bahai Faith, Age : 32, City : washington, State : DC Country : United States, Occupation : waiter, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[Ebony25540]

One could just have self love, or try to get the other into the mood.

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Name : Ebony25540, City : Utecht, State : NA Country : USA/Netherlands, 

[Jennifer]

I think that it all depends on how long the other partner hasn't been in 'the mood.' If it's only for a day or even two because your partner is physically or mentally tired and exhausted then if you 2 are a couple then I feel that there should be some sort of compassion within your relationship that you can work through that. If it has been a week or longer than maybe there is more going on to this picture than what you are revealing. If there has been a change in the work schedule, birth of a child, or a problem within one of you lives which is causing tension ie. financial problems, family crisis then sex may be the last thing on your partners mind until the situation stabilizes out or until it is completely resolved. If that is the case then you should be there to support each other to help to ease the situation. Perhaps do something out of the ordinary, a flower or a card that simply says I Love You. If none of this going on then maybe the one that is NOT in the mood isn't being satisfied physically and mentally and just doesn't know how to express that to the other partner. Talk and Listen to your partner, be open to new ideas in and out of the bedroom, and eventually everything will be okay.

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Name : Jennifer, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Baptist, Age : 28, City : Beaverton, State : OR Country : United States, Occupation : technician, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Middle class, 

[Steve]

I am in a loving happy marriage that after 15 years is rock solid. When one of us is in the mood and the other isn't we compromise. This means that sometimes the one who isn't in the mood will go along with it and see if they get into the mood. Other times the one who is in the mood will be willing to wait for another time. In any event, the RELATIONSHIP is far more important to us than the sex. If you insist on your own way - whether you're the one 'in' the mood or 'out' - then you are damaging the relationship. If you're a couple that is in it for the long haul, then you'll be sure to have your priorities in this order, and not the other way round. Hope this helps.

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Name : Steve, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Baptist, Age : 37, City : Port Stephens, State : WA Country : Australia, Occupation : Salesman, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Chaz]

Hah! When I'm in the mood and my partner is not ... we don't. When she's in the mood and I'm not ... I get in the mood! Chaz

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Name : Chaz, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 50, City : Kansas City, State : MO Country : United States, Occupation : Internet/computer, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 

[annie23892]

it totally depends for me (a woman with male partner). usually i just let him go for it - it's not too much trouble for me, he gets off and is happy, and all is well. if i'm really, really not in the mood, i just say so and ask for a raincheck. usually, that's just fine and it doesn't bother anyone. however, when i'm in the mood and he's not, i actually try to coerce him into pleasuring me (not himself) because i figure he owes me one, and what's it to him to do a little hand/mouth action once in a while? he can't get it up, and that's fine with me - i don't need a penis to have fun!

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Name : annie23892, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 32, City : seattle, State : WA Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Lisa22747]

We will compromise. If it's me who's in the mood, he'll hold me/snuggle with me while I play with a vibrator. If it's him, I touch/snuggle with him while either he masturbates or I masturabe him. And then of course there are the times we just sort of take care of things on our own.

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Name : Lisa22747, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 42, City : New Orleans, State : LA Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

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