[Mike P.]

Why do women seem obsessed with a great body on a guy? I know it is a sign of a healthy person, but shouldn't they be looking for a good personality as well? Do you have to lift weights to attract attention?

User Detail :  

Name : Mike P., Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 18, City : Iowa city, State : IA Country : United States, Occupation : college student, Social class : Middle class, 

[T27535]

I think you may be generalizing a little here. I don't think all women faint over muscle men. I for one - and in fact most of my female friends - don't. I find oily, overtanned, triangular male bodies a decisive turn-off. Add a nutcracker chin and a Neanderthal brain under bleached hair and you can see me retching. While I do approve of a nice firm bottom on a male, I prefer the lean and bony (but not skinny) type, with shapely hands, expressive eyes and a smashing smile. Which brings me to the core of the matter: It is really personality that matters in love. For instant attraction and a quick one-night stand, it's humor, cleanliness and whatever pleases most at the moment. So, no, you don't have to lift weights.

User Detail :  

Name : T27535, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Age : 33, City : Munich, State : NA Country : Germany, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

[Jessica]

For me, personality is 90 percent of what attracts me to a guy. The other 10 percent is looks. (All right, maybe it's more like 75/25, but you get the point.) I've known some men (and boys, when I was younger) who were absolute 'studs' but had the personality of a nest of angry hornets; once you got to know them, their physical beauty disappeared. I was, of course, physically attracted to all five of the men in my life with whom I had significant romantic relationships, but it was their personalities that ultimately made me want to be with them. Each, ironically, never really considered themselves attractive. Some were more or less fit and healthy, and some didn't take very good care of their bodies. I've never really been attracted to larger men (and by 'larger' I don't mean 'fat'; traditionally, I've been attracted to guys who, in retrospect, I would even consider to be unhealthily thin); but the last guy I dated was larger than the others. He wasn't fat, although by his account he was 40 pounds heavier than he'd been previously, and he whined now and then about being overweight. I didn't see this at all, even when we were together intimately. I simply saw the man. I fell in love with him, but let me clarify, I fell in love with HIM, not his body. Meaning that, while I was, of course, attracted to him physically, it was his personality that won me over. And I firmly believe I am not in the minority in feeling this way. There are a good number of women who value personality over looks. Yes, physical appearance is important, but only to a point. I'd rather be with a man who was alright-looking but took incredible care of me than with a man who worried more about his appearance than about my well-being. My last boyfriend treated me like gold. I guess it just happened to be my luck he was also really cute.

User Detail :  

Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White and Arab, Religion : Christian, Age : 24, City : San Diego, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : student, lifeguard, swim instructor, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Autumn]

Kindness, personality and compassion are only a few things the majority of women are looking for. It helps if a man takes care of himself only because it is healthy. I know when I'm in a relationship I don't want to be worrying if my boyfriend is going to kill over with a heart attack because he doesn't take care of himself. But saying that women want a man who is buff and beautifully sculpted is just not true. And besides it can go the same for men. Why do men want a woman who is 110lbs, blonde hair, blue eyes? We all can't be perfect. We just have to learn to love people for who they are.

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Name : Autumn, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 25, City : Asheville, State : NC Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Heather]

My personal opinion is to lean towards guys with a little of meat on them. My best friend claims I'm a 'chubby chaser'. Muscle is okay but mostly just glorified on TV (so what do women have to do run out and get breast implants??) It's all body image and to some it turns them on. But - when you are happy with yourself everyone else can sense that. That's the important thing. Nothing is worse that trying to be in a relationship with someone who is always unhappy (or complaining) about their body.

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Name : Heather, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : believe in a few different things, Age : 26, City : Turner, State : IL Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[Ana]

really i'm not into guys that are huge because they have tons of muscle. honestly how a guy looks is what first attracts my attention but as long as the guy is fit and has nice intense eyes that is as far as physical appearances go with me. looks might get me interested but personality will keep me interested. the guy has to be funny, smart, and willing to help people. i'd choose a nice caring guy with nice eyes over a muscle man anyday!

User Detail :  

Name : Ana, Gender : F, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Age : 16, City : kingsville, State : TX Country : United States, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, 

[Vaunda J.]

You don't think men look for only women with good-looking bodies? You don't think men aren't obsessed with a woman's great body? To answer your question: yes, people should look for a a great personality as well. As a whole, a strong argument could be made that people have become more shallow in choosing mates. However, ask yourself: when you are choosing someone to go out with, do you choose the very good-looking woman who has a bad attitude or the not-so good-looking woman who could potentially be your soulmate, but you would never know because you refuse to be seen with her in public? Note: This is not to say that all good-looking people have nasty attitudes.

User Detail :  

Name : Vaunda J., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Baptist, Age : 28, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Margee]

skinny dudes turn me on

User Detail :  

Name : Margee, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : American Indian, Age : 16, City : new orleans, State : LA Country : United States, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Lower middle class, 

[LW]

i know you didnt ask for a guy's opinion but just think about it when you look at a magazine with hot chicks in there or when you see jlo or some one like that you have an instant attraction only because the first way a person is being evaluated on is their appearance. while a personality takes a long time to undestand judge and deal with the apppearance of a person takes a second to judge and it makes the personality bearable if its good or bad .Ask your self this :are you attracted to women fit, in shape, wit clear skinn or not, smoothed legs or not, and a good or bad personality or are you attracted more to women out of shape over weight wit clear skinn or not,smooth legs or not,and a good and bad personality? probably the first one .. what im trying to say is are you attracted to jlo or miss doubt fire jlo i hope ,miss doubt fire may have a nice personality but jlo has the looks that can make any personality bearable all im saying is the first rounds looks the seconds personality and its hard to make it past the first round depending on a girls previous boyfriends (they always set the standard)why d you think that puff daddy cant find a girl ?cause his standards are too high and until he finds someone higher hes gonna be stuck on jlo. anyway i hope i helped oh an for your last question no you dnt have to lift to attract attention you just have to have another factor that takes the place of that like a way for people to notice you other than a masculine appearance. good luck and remember if you like a fit person (mostly not all the time though ) they'll usually like a person fit aswell usually because they look god together or the persons closer o their size any way god huntin man or bird watchin

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Name : LW, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : mexican indian ,african ameican,.., Religion : Christian, Age : 16, City : va beach, State : VA Country : United States, Occupation : student high school, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[Muffin]

I would have to say yes because women are expected to have flat stomachs with a big behinds, so why not put pressure on the men some.

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Name : Muffin, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Jehovahs Witness, Age : 17, City : Savannah, State : GA Country : United States, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Lower middle class, 

[Jamie20912]

When it comes to the bodybuilder type I am definately not interested. Even guys with a medium yet still well-defined build such as sculpted arms, etc. I don't typically look at though I do find that type of build attractive. The thing is that that only really comes in to play if I am attracted to their personality. From my past experience even typically negative physical features at first glance could easily become attractive if I'm turned on by their personality. It's like looking at someone physically through either rosy or puke green tinted glasses. If they're the extroverted type around people I can usually gather enough information as to whether accepting or pursuing any attention hinting at sexual would be a good idea or not. Though I guess the problem is if they don't seem so obvious in that way and they also don't come off as physically attractive I wouldn't go much further than that I think because I would be to nervous or uncomfortable about giving off those sexual vibes if I was uneasy about whether I wanted that back. Same thing as to if they approached me. I could be accidently be too standoffish. To be honest I would be even more coy if the guy was around being overweight. I mean, when I visualize a guy romantically or even just so he is close to normal weight or thin. Though everything I percieve about their personality and intentions definitely becomes about 80% to 90% of the winning factor.

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Name : Jamie20912, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, City : Reading, State : PA Country : United States, Social class : Middle class, 

[Stephanie]

I am totally with T. from Germany: personality is my number-one turn on, no kidding. But once I've got my eyes on a guy, a nice lean body, with lovely hands, beautiful eyes and a cute little butt, is a definite plus. (oh, hey, I just described my boyfriend right there. lucky me. :) Sure, a little muscle tone can't hurt -- men (and transitioning guys who are on testosterone) can quickly develop nice arm definition with just a little work. But huge muscles (not to mention the hours those guys have to spend in the gym) annoy me every time.

User Detail :  

Name : Stephanie, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 23, City : Norman, State : OK Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Anna]

I don't think I would say that women are 'obsessed' with a great body on a guy. Did you have an experience that made you feel this way? I think when women get together in a gaggle (like we dooo) there's a tendency to be very, mm, what a great behind, damn look at those pecs, viggo this brad that... but in a way that is comparable to the way men would view good looking women when the men are in one of their gaggles. In addition, there are lots of grunting, bulky gym rats that are a huge turn off. I think that a better way to attract women than lifting weights is to dress 'nicely,' exude confidence, and don't generalize about what women want.

User Detail :  

Name : Anna, Gender : F, City : Rutland, State : VT Country : United States, Social class : Middle class, 

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