Dating different races or cultures

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  • #1194

    Sara28362
    Participant
    Is dating different races or cultures right or wrong? A lot of people consider it wrong, and some people think it is right. I do not really have an opinion, but I would like to know what someone else has to say.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Sara28362, Gender : F, City : Strathmore, State : CA Country : United States, 
    #33846

    Cynthia
    Member
    With people you care for, it doesn't matter what their race or culture is. Everyone is human, with red blood in their veins. So if you are interested in someone, go for it, and get to know them for who they are inside. Treat others as you want to be treated. Enjoy life, and don't let anyone else tell or influence who you can love.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Cynthia, Gender : F, Age : 27, City : Porterville, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Student/mother, Education level : 2 Years of College, 
    #41060

    Kelly26583
    Participant
    I think you should be able to date anyone you want. I'm sick and tired of people saying that people of different cultures can't get along because they don't have much in common. Do you think a Korean adoptee, who grew up with white parents in a predominantly white, upper-middle class town has much in common with a child of Korean immigrants who grew up in the inner city? Would you even consider setting them up? Even a person like myself, who grew up in an area that has a decent Asian population, may have little in common with other people of the same background. So no, I do not have a problem with dating outside my ethnicity/race. I date who I like and who I have things in common with.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Kelly26583, Gender : F, Race : Asian, Age : 24, City : Some City, State : NA Country : Canada, Occupation : Grad school student, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 
    #14493
    I don't believe people of ANY other ethnic culture respect black men and women. They don't want to 'date' us in the conventional sense - they want to screw us, bed us down. I would never date a white man. The history between black women and white men in this country is too dirty, too ugly, too hateful. The thought of a white man on top of me, having a 'master/slave' fantasy, repulses me. So I'll stick with black men.

    User Detail :  

    Name : RhondaOutlaw, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 41, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, Occupation : Account Representative, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #43421

    Jamie
    Member
    Seeking partners of certain cultures or races is simply a matter of personal taste. Your culture may be an important part of your life, and perhaps you couldn't imagine being with someone who isn't a part of that culture. Maybe you're simply not attracted to people of a different race. There's nothing wrong with that. These are personal choices; if you don't want to go out with someone because they are a certain race or culture, then these are your tastes and you're entitled to them. However, there is nothing 'wrong' with dating someone of a different race, just as there is nothing wrong with dating someone of a different star sign or different IQ or different weight. We all have differences, but we're all exactly the same species: human.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Jamie, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 26, City : Torbay, State : NA Country : United Kingdom, Occupation : designer, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 
    #16034

    Sara
    Member
    I have never felt it's wrong to date someone of another race or culture. Sometimes we really cannot help who we are attracted to; it just happens. Love is love, and it comes in all colors, shapes and sizes...

    User Detail :  

    Name : Sara, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Pagan, Age : 25, City : Weld, State : ME Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #28632

    Arnie-U
    Participant
    Dating is an ambivalent term because it can mean 1.) going out to enjoy the company of another person, or 2.) going out with someone with the purpose of looking for a life partner. When young people are growing up, they want to experience life from many perspectives. What is it like to live in Europe? What is it like to live in South America? What are Africans or Asians like? Dating for the purpose of getting to know many different kinds of people is positive. Making friends with all kinds of people is a plus. However, there is a caveat here: Sometimes the meaning of dating changes from casual friendship to looking for a life partner. Spending consistent time with people in dating or working will produce a relationship, with strong emotions at times. Then, making decisions that will affect one's life becomes very difficult in the presence of strong emotions. Dr. Laura has said that people in their middle age years will go back to what they grew up with. A Christian who marries a non-Christian will feel the yearning to go back to church. A Catholic will yearn to go back to their roots. I agree with that opinion. So, if a person is convinced in their own mind that they want to adopt a new culture, he or she can marry into it. But there will be days of regret and difficulty, and misunderstanding to be endured.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Arnie-U, Gender : M, Age : 50, City : Edmonton, Alberta, State : NA Country : Canada, 
    #19431

    JerryS
    Participant
    I don't think it breaks down to right vs. wrong. In many cases, dating someone from the same background as yourself is easier: it ensures that you have something, maybe many things, in common, ranging from the types of food you like to the way you view the world. On the other hand, differences can be stimulating. My first wife was from a very different background: socially, economically, racially and religiously. I introduced her to opera, the value of education, my religion and more generally the idea of intellectual curiosity (which in her background was not encouraged); and although our marriage didn't last, she went on to explore the world in ways she never would otherwise have done. (Our differences did not cause our marriage to fail, it was something more fundamental.) I didn't learn much from her, though; she was too busy adopting my values and abandoning hers for it to be a two-way street. However, I've seen other couples shake themselves apart because they each had strongly held values and viewed maintaining them as central to their individual identities. One final comment: a lot of this stuff doesn't really surface until there are children. Then, suddenly, this tradition or that belief becomes something you really need your child to share.

    User Detail :  

    Name : JerryS, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Jewish, Age : 52, City : New Britain, State : CT Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 
    #19067

    Tom
    Participant
    True love goes beyond race and culture, many would argue. There are many happy cross-cultural or inter-racial marriages. However, the success or failure of such relationships depends on how the two parties see their differences in their daily life. On the excitement side, the significant other brings to the relationship a joyful sense of adventure and discovery. On the 'soul mate' side, different diet preferences, language barriers, etc. could sometime cause miscommunication and misunderstanding.

    To make dating work between people of different cultural backgrounds, both parties should be open-minded and should put more than the usual effort into sustaining and nurturing mutual understanding

    User Detail :  

    Name : Tom, Gender : M, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Age : 50, City : Honolulu, State : HI Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, 
    #26364

    Jerry-S
    Participant
    'Dr. Laura has said that people in their middle age years will go back to what they grew up with.' What an odd thing for her to say. Given that she is a convert to Judaism, this strikes me as somewhat contradictory to the way she lives her own life.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Jerry-S, Gender : M, City : New Britain, State : CT Country : United States, 
    #43685

    J21182
    Participant
    if dating outside your group is 'polluting the blood', couldn't you consider dating inside your group as incest?

    User Detail :  

    Name : J21182, City : Albany, State : NY Country : United States, 
    #35203

    Matt
    Participant
    Different people look to different sources to define right and wrong. Is it wrong because some holy book forbids it? I can't think of any that forbid dating or marriage across racial lines off the top of my head, although quite a few warn against becoming married to someone of another religion. Is it wrong because it will cause others to suffer? Kind of a stretch in my opinion; the closest you could get there is an arguement about society not being accepting of mixed-race children, in which case the wrongness could just as easily be blamed on the racism of others. I personally have dated both black women and white women, and my personal experience is that common values and beliefs are far more important considerations to making a relationship work than race is.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Matt, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 25, City : Oxford, State : GA Country : United States, Occupation : Engineer, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #42828

    Josh M
    Participant
    I have read all the reponses, and I believe only some have gotten the piont across. When will we learn? Why must EVERYTHING be stereotypicilized? 'Whites' 'Blacks'. When a baby is born it does not grow up thinking, oh well I'm black or hispanic or white and thus forth only be with my 'own kind'. We learn and observe hate and love. The evoltion of man has come so far but so little in the same respect, it saddens me. We are all humans, are concieved the same way, born the same way. I say to hell with 'don't mix' 'pure blood' I say 'Let your heart lead the way, Home is where the heart is.'

    User Detail :  

    Name : Josh M, Gender : M, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Religion : Pentecostal, Age : 15, City : Los Angeles, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 
    #26138

    shay
    Participant
    I definitely do not think it is wrong to date other cultures or races. You can learn so much from other people. There may be problems in the future to consider, like when having children. Many children that are products of interracial relationships have a difficult time growing up. If you are open with them about how to handle confrontations, they will be more comfortable with themselves. I have had several relationships with people outside of my race and culture. It really opens your eyes as to what the world is all about!

    User Detail :  

    Name : shay, City : amherst, State : MA Country : United States, 
    #15762

    Jolene
    Participant
    It's really up to the individual. I am in a mixed-race marriage (I'm of Aboriginal Australian descent)and it works for both myself and my husband (who is Irish). Relationships work if the couple have both compatibility and contrast when it comes to personality and interests. Race should never really be considered when it comes to choosing a partner.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Jolene, Gender : F, City : Sydney, State : NA Country : Australia, 
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