Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences - This topic has 31 replies, 31 voices, and was last updated 17 years, 8 months ago by
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I met this girl a few days ago who is absolutely gorgeous and has a really awesome personality. I feel as if I’m sexually attracted to her, which is creeping me out a lot. I saw a picture of her and was immediately turned on. Also, I was watching a movie and there happened to be a lesbian makeout scene that I thought was very sexy and turned me on as well. And I also have some lesbian fantasies. Am I bi, and if I am, should I tell my best friend, who is very accepting of gays, or wait a while? This has been on my mind for a couple days now and it’s scaring me to think that I’m bi.
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Name : Ashley, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 16, City : na, State : NY, Country : United States, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,In reality, it is totally normal for teens to have mixed feelings of sexuality…. It is not weird to discover your sexual prefernce at this age…. anyways… what I find weird is that you express no sexual feelings for other females… and even if you did… the problem with our society is that we LOVE labels… we only know Straight, Gay, and BI. but there are SO many level in between… for example.. finding girls sexually attractive, but not wanting to have a relationship. Just let yourself feel what you feel, it might just go away.. or you might be BI… And about telling your friend: maybe she can help you sort through your fellings in a non-pressuring manner.
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Name : Kevin, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Gay, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Religion : Atheist, Age : 17, City : Los Angeles, State : CA, Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,You’re 16. At your age, if you’re in the right mood, going through a carwash might turn you on. When the old hormones get to percolating, curiosity can lead to arousal, even if you didn’t think you were ‘that way’. It may be that you’re very attracted to her ‘really awesome personality’ and your body is interpreting that through the haze of budding sexuality. The British have a word for this sort of thing: ‘Pash,’ to wit a same-sex crush among teenaged girls. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re gay or bi. It could simply be that her self-confidence and charisma are appealing to you, and are traits you’d like to see in a partner. If you have a trusted adult you can discuss your confusion with, I would, but for Gods’ sakes, don’t talk about this with your peers, unless you fancy being branded a ‘dyke.’
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Name : Ann L. Lowenstein, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Animist, Age : 37, City : K.C., State : MO, Country : United States, Occupation : Administrative Assistant, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Sexual orientation is a very personal concept, and it is not up to any of us out here to tell you that you are or are not a certain way. If you feel emotionally, physically, sexually attracted to this woman after having previously had only crushes on guys, then maybe you are bi. Maybe you are straight and happen to be attracted to the features of this one person. The way I see it, labels are not important and sexual orientation is on a spectrum, few people are solely gay or straight, but some mix of the two. Perhaps you find yourself somewhere without a label, and that is just fine. Love knows no boundaries, nor limits. You are a person, you are attracted to people who may or may not be male or female. I would say, talk to your friend, tell them your feelings and thoughts, and don’t feel the need to immediatly put a label on yourself. Talking has helped so many people work out the confusion.
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Name : Adrian, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 16, City : Davis, State : CA, Country : United States, Occupation : student,I would say wait, because sometimes when you have friends who are gay or bi it can encourage these feelings, however if you are having these feelings you owe it to yourself to explore them. find a friend you trust, just be careful, women can hurt worse than men sometimes. Make sure of what you want before you tell your best friend, If either of you have feelings for one another.
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Name : Mickey, Gender : Female, Race : American Indian, Age : 24, City : Garfield, State : AR, Country : United States, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Lower middle class,To Ashley: First I would like to say that I completely understand where you’re coming from. I sometimes fear I may just happen to be attracted to both sexes. Let’s face it, women are very beautiful and can over exude sex appeal, so it makes sense as why you enjoy these feelings and fantasies and at the same time have come to shun them. There are times when I become absolutely lusty for the hottest guys, and then there are times when I see an attractive girl, and I become instantly tingly inside. Even more so, if I’m near her or maybe in her presence. Whether to tell your best friend, I think you should. However, that’s when you feel comfortable. You shouldn’t have to feel force to keep this a secret from that person. If that person stills considers a friend, then look at yourself as lucky. Furthermore, I feel the same as you as far as feeling ashamed. Especially, for me I come from a Christian background and was raised in church all my life up uptil I was seventeen. Which was two and a half years ago. I still go to church occasionally. There are times when I just can’t shake the guilt when I enter. On top of that I’m sick, hell and brimstone bound, perverted, and or as some call it ‘ demon possessed, one can see how I want to to be restored back to my religion and to God( that’s only if you believe in him.), but at the same time feeling alienated and rejected by both.
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Name : Anonymous, City : Daytona Beach, State : FL, Country : United States,First, sexual orientation is always a part of someone, but certainly not all of them. for some it’s a big part of their lives, and for others, it can be pretty unimportant. So don’t freak if you think you’re bi- being bisexual means nothing more than liking both guys and girls. It sounds like you could be bisexual, but don’t rush to label yourself. Just give it time, and don’t worry about it. I wouldn’t tell your friend that you are bi until you are sure that you are, but if you feel like telling her, then tell her you MIGHT be bi. Take your time, you’ll know.
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Name : Emily, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 16, City : Seattle, State : WA, Country : United States, Occupation : Student,I don’t think that means you are bisexual. I think that it means you are in a very experimental stage and different things are going to happen over your life. I think that it is perfectly healthy to have wants and desires. This does not mean you are bi. It is healthy to have these feelings, I think it means you are normal. Everyone has gone through this! Ask your friend some hypothetical questions and see if she bites. Maybe she is just as shy about the topic as you are and you might learn more about the both of you.
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Name : Natasha Brauer, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 25, City : Marion, State : AR, Country : United States, Occupation : library clerk, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Lower middle class,It’s been said that everyone has a little bit of bi in them. Sometimes you’ll find girls attractive. That doesn’t make you bi. It might just be a phase. I had that phase, too. Even if you are, it’s not a bad thing.
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Name : Angel-M, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 17, City : Des Moines, State : IA, Country : United Kingdom, Occupation : high school student, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,I don’t think a person should feel obligated to ‘title’ themselves bi, gay, straight or lesbian just because of what turns them on. Why put a label on yourself based upon who you are attracted to? Aren’t you still the same person inside that you have always been? what difference does it make who turns you on? Talking with your friend about this might make you feel better, but in the long run, you are the one who has to decide whether or not to label yourself bisexual.
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Name : Gretchen, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Pagan, Age : 24, City : Joplin, State : MO, Country : United States, Occupation : Caregiver, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Lower middle class,I think that you are bicurious because you are not bisexual until you have tried it and you enjoy it…..Telling your friend who is very open is great…if its your bestfriend….she may introduce you to a bisexual experience, that is mostly how you get started..
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Name : Freda, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : Black/African American, Age : 25, City : Indianola, State : MS, Country : United States, Occupation : Clerk, Education level : High School Diploma,I believe that right now you are bicurious…I don’t think you are bisexual until you have tried it and you like it. On the other hand, your best friend seems to be open-minded…I would tell her and most likely she will be the one to introduce you to it..That is mostly how people get started, anyway.
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Name : Freda, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : Black/African American, Age : 25, City : Indianola, State : MS, Country : United States, Occupation : Clerk, Education level : High School Diploma,There’s no harm in waiting before you tell people. I think that for a lot of people who go through what you’re going through, it’s easiest to talk about the possibility of not being straight when YOU feel comfortable with it yourself…unless you think talking to your friend will help you get more comfortable with the idea of maybe being bisexual. It can be weird and scary to contemplate the possibility of being bisexual for the first time, because bisexuality can be a little harder to figure out than being gay or lesbian, and a little more confusing in terms of what it means. I think the most important thing for you is to get yourself used to the idea so that it’s not quite as scary a thought any more–once you’ve given yourself the time to become comfortable with yourself and your questioning, the answer as to whether or not you’re bi or not should become much easier to figure out. You are doing all the right things to get yourself more comfortable–asking questions, trying to figure things out, addressing the issue and your feelings about it.
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Name : Amy, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 20, City : College Park, State : MD, Country : United States, Occupation : Nanny, College Student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class,Only you can really say for sure, because it’s not like there’s a test for this sort of thing and only you know how you feel. It’s perfectly normal for straight people to notice when people of the same gender are good-looking, and to even feel attracted to them. Though I know for sure that I am straight, I’ve had the occasional dream or thought another girl was sexy. It can be hard to tell the difference, because with both there’s a feeling of attraction and it can be hard to figure out why exactly you are attracted. You could be attracted because you’re bisexual, or you could be attracted because you’re jealous and want to be them.
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Name : Avalikia28923, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : Asperger's Syndrome, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Mormon, Age : 22, City : Provo, State : UT, Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Turned on by girls and lesbian fantasies? Yep, I’d say you’re bi. But there’s nothing wrong with that. I hope by now you’ve told your friend, because having a supportive friend will make a big difference.
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Name : Amy, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Secular Humanist, Age : 23, City : na, State : LA, Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class,
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