February 27, 2001 at 12:00 am #16836
N.J. Smith
Participant
When I was 21 I fell in love with another woman, a good friend who came on to me. It surprised me. After that relationship ended, I thought it was possible to fall in love with anyone, male or female. Years passed before I realized I was a lesbian. I was never satisfied with sexual activities with men, only women. I have come to believe that my upbringing (which taught me that being gay was bad) caused me to deny my orientation. A sort of brainwashing occurred during my childhood, and I was well into adulthood before I overcame it.