[QueerByChoice]

Most people in modern societies are raised to think of themselves as heterosexual. Those of us who eventually come to think of ourselves as anything other than heterosexual usually do so only after having experienced anywhere from a few years to several decades of life defining ourselves as heterosexuals. Therefore, when we hear others say they are ‘heterosexual,’ we bear in mind that we, too, might have said the same thing at one time, but that having said this did not prevent us from later redefining ourselves as non-heterosexuals. By contrast, the number of self-defined non-heterosexual people who later permanently redefine themselves as heterosexual is noticably smaller than the number of self-defined heterosexuals who later permanently redefine themselves as non-heterosexual. Self-defined non-heterosexual people have nearly always spent a lot more time thinking about the topic of sexual orientation and their own sexual orientation in particular than self-defined heterosexuals have, and thus their definition of themselves as ‘definitely and entirely gay’ may be presumed to have been reached after more careful thought than most heterosexuals have given to their definitions of themselves as ‘definitely and entirely heterosexual.’ This is not to say that your gay friends shouldn’t try a little harder to ask themselves whether they really are absolutely 100 percent gay. Of course they should question their sexual orientation – everybody should question all aspects of their identities. But until you’re willing to question your own sexual orientation, you’re not really in a position to lecture them about questioning theirs – because they already HAVE questioned their sexual orientations at least once, when they switched from defining themselves as heterosexuals the way their parents taught them to, to defining themselves as homosexuals the way they now do. All people should always question themselves – but you do need to remember that your gay friends are one step ahead of you on this.

User Detail :  

Name : QueerByChoice, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Religion : Atheist, Age : 23, City : Sacramento, State : CA, Country : United States, 

[Author]

Posts