[ACC25054]

My father was 22 when he married my mother, who was 15. They had their first child about seven months later, though they both believe they would have eventually gotten married later. My maternal grandparents were initially opposed to the marriage, but changed their minds because they knew my father was a good man and it would be better for the child to be raised by both parents. This was back in the 1950s, and it was very common back then for an older man to marry or live with a teenage girl, though less common among Anglos than Mexican-Americans, especially middle-class Anglos. And ironically, my grandparents never married and only had common law status forced on them by a judge. That was also pretty common back then, because many people were too poor to afford weddings. Again, it was far more common among Mexican-Americans than Anglos. My own wife was 17 when we married and I was 31, and no one in our families thought any less of us for that. It’s a tough call for this case, though, because so much is left out of your question. Is this man closer in age to 19 or 59? How long have they been living together, and how old was she when they started seeing each other? Are they in love or not? The answers make quite a difference in whether he’s not much more than a confused kid himself, a man who fell in love with her in spite of her age, or just a creep out to take advantage of a naive girl. My own take is that this lawyer is desperately seeking some kind of a defense and is thus exaggerating, almost stereotyping. Yes, at least until recently, there is less of a stigma for couples with lots of difference in age than there is among Anglos. But that shouldn’t make any difference if this is someone out to use a girl for sex rather than a man taking responsibility who actually cares about her and takes care of her and their child. If it is the former, I hope you do confront this lawyer. But if it is the latter, I hope you overcome your own preconceptions and let this be.

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Name : ACC25054, Gender : M, Race : Mexican and American Indian, Age : 36, City : Phoenix, State : AZ, Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, 

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