[Marlene22124]

As both a transsexual and a lesbian, I have a hard time with the gay and lesbian community at large, which fails to acknowledge transsexuals can also be as queer as they are. Why can’t gays and lesbians accept us for who we are – their gay and lesbian brothers and sisters?
Original Code SO68. Click here to see responses from the original archives. Click “to respond” below to reply.

User Detail :  

Name : Marlene22124, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian Transsexual, Age : 38, City : N. Baltimore, State : OH, Country : United States, 

[Laura W.]

Unfortunately, gays and lesbians are no less prone to bigoted attitudes than are straights. You would think we would be, having suffered the results of bigotry ourselves. However, we live in a culture that doesn’t tend to acknowledge the connections between different forms of discrimination. I have noticed there is just as much racism, anti-Semitism, ageism and classism in the non-straight community as there is in mainstream culture. And I have noticed even more sexism. (E.g. Joshua G.’s response (Original Archives) and remarks regarding how lesbians think – pure stereotypical nonsense.) Since most of us aren’t transexuals, and most of us are no more tolerant of diversity than straights, there is bound to be discrimination against transexuals, even though we claim to include you in our community. We should be willing to offer to others what we are asking for ourselves, but unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to work that way much of the time.

User Detail :  

Name : Laura W., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Religion : Jewish, Age : 37, City : Los Angeles, State : CA, Country : United States, 

[DykeOnByke]

Fear of the unknown and unfamiliar is much of the answer to this question. In my experience, many gays and lesbians seem to have more difficulty accepting a transsexual person’s acknowledged gender rather than their sexual orientation per se.

The interface between gender identity, sexual orientation and gender roles is a complex one. For most transsexuals, the primary issue centers on gender identity – the struggle to align gender identity (psychological gender) and physical body image (biological sex). Whether the transsexual is sexually attracted to men or to women, that attraction seems to remain constant before or after sexual reassignment surgery. By definition, however, his/her sexual orientation may be perceived to have changed from either heterosexual to homosexual, or from homosexual to heterosexual, another perceived ambiguity that may make both gays and straights uncomfortable.

Gays and lesbians struggle against misconceptions that we really want to be the opposite sex (why else would we be attracted to the same sex?) or that we can simply ‘choose’ to be straight. To some in the gay/lesbian/bisexual community, transsexuals as a group represent the reality of this – people who do indeed change their sex and (by default) sexual orientation. As a result, they may distance themselves from transsexual people. As gender outlaws, gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transsexuals share some common issues and struggles. We also have some separate issues and struggles. Regardless of our differences and similarities, I hope all would try to be as understanding, compassionate and respectful of each other as possible. For this to happen, education, exposure and an ongoing dialogue are important. Reading Leslie Feinberg’s Stone Butch Blues was the catalyst for my journey toward understanding transgender lives, particularly transsexual workplace issues.

User Detail :  

Name : DykeOnByke, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 48, City : Southfield, State : MI, Country : United States, Occupation : Engineer; corporate diversity council member, 

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