Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences - This topic has 5 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 20 years, 2 months ago by
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I recently started to talk to a guy who lives very far from me. We met online and have been speaking on the phone as well. I have never considered having feelings for someone I dont know. But this guy makes me feel great. I don’t have problems getting dates or having relationships, but talking to him is different. I always said that having feelings for someone whom I’ve met online is ridiculous. But I was wondering: is this normal? Has this happened to many people out there? And if it has, what did you do or how did you handle those feelings?
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Name : Sherri, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 18, City : Dallas, State : TX, Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,We don’t decide to have feelings; we just have them. The important thing is what we do about them. You can continue to enjoy talking and emailing this guy, but that is no substitute for getting to know someone in real life. If you do get together in real life (safely, of course), you have to ensure that your current feelings about him don’t cause you to bypass the normal process of meeting him, getting to know him and perhaps someday dating him. Remember that on the computer, and to a lesser extent the phone, you’re only seeing the part of him that he wants you to see – that’s much harder to do in real life.
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Name : James D., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Gay, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 47, City : Summit, State : NJ, Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College,Don’t feel bad about yourself, because it happens to a good number of people who go yacking on the Internet. By nature you’re seeking a mate, whether you want to seek a mate or not, and by meeting this medium where people are visualized by text floating across the screen, people are bound to take a liking for one another, as they have always done. But you must realize, first, that no matter how much you think you know about this person, you do not know them. Even with no malice in the picture at all, the person at the console is not wholly the person in the text. You have an image of this person, reading his words and painting a picture as one tends to do, in a dream-like fantasy that can only bring you inward. Despite the few fairy tales one hears on the news and talk shows, Internet relationships don’t work. They’re based on a world that does not exist. As one pursues this relationship with a person who exists only within phone cables, his real life diminishes, and he becomes alone. My suggestion to you is to stay in the real world, and date real people. Even if this guy is the most honest fellow in the world and isn’t lying about who he is, your relationship will be a pit of misery and loneliness, though at times you may believe you are happy. Unless you’re rich enough to move to a new city every time you get a new boyfriend, I suggest you keep your real-life relations in your real life. The Internet is good for forums and opinion gathering. It is a foolish place to find dates.
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Name : Matt22044, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 23, City : Somewhere, State : TN, Country : United States, Occupation : Software Engineer/Musician, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Now you’ve got me thinking…… I met my guy online…we IM’d for awhile, then talked on the phone for awhile, then met. We have been together since, it will be 10 months soon. He told me ‘ I was the most cautious woman he had ‘met’ online. I was very leery, since it was my 1st and only time I had tried Internet dating. I feel very fortunate to have had such luck at finding a man that truely likes the same things as I do and and feels the same way about life issues.
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Name : LA, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 49, City : Inland NW, State : WA, Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College,There are a lot of warnings to go with ‘meeting someone online’ but I’ll let someone else give them to you. I’ll just tell you my story. I had never met my boyfriend when I decided I wanted to go out with him. I had never spoken to him, online, on the phone, or otherwise. I had only heard about him from a friend who knew him. I had never even seen his picture. What I did was take it slowly and make sure that my feelings were true, and not some kind of desperation. I asked to see pictures of him, and he was good looking. I conned my way into meeting him and talking to him. And slowly but surely we figured out we were falling in love. We’ve been together five years now. Feelings and emotions can start from nothing. The trick is not letting them rule you or confuse you too much.
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Name : Meiran, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 24, City : Roanoke, State : VA, Country : United States, Occupation : Writer, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Sherri, I met someone on the internet too. Like you, I was not looking for an online relationship and was actively involved in dating men in the ‘real world.’ Internet-guy and I have now been married almost 3 years. Don’t dismiss the possibility of a friendship because you met the guy online. It happens all of the time, to a lot of people. You are not a freak for meeting someone online, and you are not the first person to experience feelings for an online pal. At the very least, you have a friend to talk to that makes you ‘feel great.’ Don’t make it out to be more than it is, but enjoy the conversations and good feelings. There is no need to be embarrassed.
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Name : Zoey19732, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 30, City : Tampa, State : FL, Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper class,
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