[Julie-B]

Why are Asian male/white female couples much rarer than Asian female/white male couples? And why does one hardly ever see an Asian male/black female couple?
Original Code R376. Click here to see responses from the original archives. Click “to respond” below to reply.

User Detail :  

Name : Julie-B, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 25, City : Baltimore, State : MD, Country : United States, 

[Celia-P]

I am responding as an Asian immigrant married to another Asian and with three grown-up Asian-American children. I do not care who my children marry as long as they are caring, kind and open-minded people. However, some of the conversations I have heard on the subject consist of Asian parents believing the stereotype of white American females as being ‘easy’ and not as ‘wifely’ as Asian females. They then tend to discourage their sons from marrying white females.

When it comes to their daughters, however, they like to foster independence and quietly abhor the fact that Asian females generally tend to be subordinate to their Asian husbands, so they welcome a white son-in-law who generally is more tolerant of independent wives and actually tends to be more involved with their children’s rearing than many Asian males. As far as Asian male/black female unions, many Asian immigrants are victims of white colonization and therefore buy into many of the prejudices against blacks, and many of the stigma/marked physical differences. Many Asians would rather look like Europeans because the ‘standard’ of beauty that has been promoted all over the world is that of a white, blonde blue-eyed person. It is rather sad, because Asians are just as ‘marked’ as any other ethnic group in American society, and yet they buy into this ‘markedness’ by being prejudiced against blacks, and having stereotypes of white females.

User Detail :  

Name : Celia-P, Gender : F, Race : Asian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 53, City : Davenport, State : IA, Country : United States, Occupation : Instructor, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper class, 

[Crystal]

Where I live, in the San Francisco Bay area, AM/WF couples are, in my experience, just as common as the reverse amongst the under-40 set. In fact, I have seen personals ads from Asian men seeking white women exclusively and vice versa. The Bay Area is very diverse and very tolerant. Also, a rather large percentage of white men here are gay so there is, proportionately, a larger pool of single straight Asian men than white men. I have dated Asian men (I am white) and haven’t experienced any flak for it.

User Detail :  

Name : Crystal, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Pagan, Age : 30's, City : Oakland, State : CA, Country : United States, Occupation : Office Manager, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Gwon S.]

I live in Los Angeles and I see more white male/Asian female couples than Asian male/white female couples. I, too, believe that the media just screws Asian males. However, I heard that the situation is different in Europe. (I’m not sure about England though). I’ve been to Sydney, Australia, and I’ve noticed that the ratio there is about the same. America should stop creating stereotypes about Asian men.

User Detail :  

Name : Gwon S., Gender : M, Age : 24, City : Los Angeles, State : CA, Country : United States, 

[Crystal]

I think the most common reason for the disparity is that Asian men don’t think white women would date them, and vice versa. However, the number of AM/WF couples is increasing rapidly – ‘Newsweek’ magazine even wrote an article on them.

User Detail :  

Name : Crystal, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Pagan, Age : 30's, City : Oakland, State : CA, Country : United States, Occupation : Office Manager, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Taz & Runner]

Julie, i’m a black women married to an asian man Euphoria : http://www.geocities.com/euphorialuv1/ I feel I can answer your question better than other’s here. There are many asian man/black women couples and families. I’ve found that many are just shy and like to live a quiet life. Also main stream society and media really don’t acknowledge that black women are desirable as wife’s and companions. Black women are mainly seen as un-educated, loud, over weight, and aggressive which of course is not true for all black women. Another reason that many don’t see asian man black couples is the lack of exposure to them in movies, books, etc. But this is changing. Asian man black women couples are getting more exposure in movies, television and other media areas. I’ve started different sections on my website that highlights this. You and anyone else are more than welcome to visit and see for yourself.

User Detail :  

Name : Taz & Runner, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 30, City : New York, State : NY, Country : United States, 

[Author]

Posts