I would strongly recommend that you read, Bridging The Gap Between Black Women & White Women: Divided Sisters by Midge Wilson and Kathy Russell. This book will not tell you everything there is to know about black women. However, I believe it will provide you a strong foundation that will lead to insight about black women and the relationship we as black women have had with the dominant group, specifically white women. I applaud your efforts and hope you are able to forge a relationship that extends itself to something beyond black and white.
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Name : Elle, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 30, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Occupation : stay-at-home mom/grad student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, I decided to respond again to this post based upon some of the replys received. Apparently, there are some people who have wrongly assumed that there is no such thing as 'white privilege'. Why do we remain oblivious to our individual advantages and privileges? I would just like to set the record straight by informing a select few that their is a such thing as 'white privilege'. A better description of white privilege would be UNEARNED PRIVILEGES. By unearned privileges, I am referring to those benefits that we (both Black and Whites) received that we have through no effort of our own. Those in the dominate group (Whites) benefit daily from unearned privileges to the disadvantage of those in the non-dominate group. Just so we are clear about what white privileges are, I would like to refer to a book written by, Peggy McIntosh, entitled 'White Privilege and Male Privilege. She describes white privilege as being 'invisible, weightless knapsack of special provisions, assurances, tools, maps and guides....' When was the last time you were shopping in an upscale store and harrassed by security? When was the last time that you went to a mall, restaurant, and etc and received inferior services based upon your race? When was the last time that you were at the check out counter and paid by personal check and asked to show the clerk additional identification outside of the standard drivers license and major credit card? When was the last time you tried hailing a cab and were passed over for an African-American? When was the last time you were denied housing in certain markets because of your race? I could go on and on with instances like the above and I am certain your answer would be A resounding NEVER! The point that I am simply making is that their is such a thing as White privilege and it is my hopes that these examples will raise your consciousness. It is also my hope that you will begin to closely examine when and how you have been the recipient of white/unearned privilege. We do not live in a meritocracy. Lastly, Affirmative Action is NOT synonymous with less qualified and unworthy!
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Name : Elle, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 30, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Occupation : Black educated at home mom, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, I just can't let Mari's comment pass about there being 'no such thing as white privilege anymore'. It sounds like you are the one who needs to make some black friends! If you do, you will notice that your white skin affords you all kinds of privileges you never even noticed. Like welcoming smiles in all sorts of white dominated establishments. Like easier access to jobs. Like quicker service in a restaurant.There are so many ways being white makes things easier in this white-dominated culture. Most of the time it's subtle, but sometimes it's not. Remaining ignorant as to how the skin that covers you effects your life is another luxury black people don't have. This reminds me of how people only notice other peoples accents, thinking that somehow they are the only ones with 'no accent'.
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Name : Theo24740, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 32, City : Atlanta, State : GA Country : United States, Racial/cultural boundries do exist, if only in a person's fear of reaching out to another person rather than on a wide societal level. I can relate to your interest and your uncertainty, Lori. I grew up in very white-Christian Helena, Mont. Finding myself in multi-ethnic situations, I've wanted to reach out into the non-white world and establish friends from other backgrounds. I had several frustrating experiences trying to get to know folks within groups of Korean and Taiwanese students and finding no way to connect with them as a group. They have so much shared experience that I do not. Even as individuals, I later realized that my interest in their different understanding of the world overode seeing them as individuals. So what is the juncture between personality and culture? I don't know, and I left the situation fealing guilty, like I had broken some P.C. rules, which was unfortunate. My advice to you is to honor your interest in 'the' black American experience, and pursue it, but seperate it from the desire to make new friends. As other folks have said here, a friendship develops as a multifaceted, organic thing.
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Name : Adam, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 19, City : Bar Harbor, State : ME Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, There is certainly something called 'white privilege.' White privilege is turning on the television or opening up a magazine and seeing your race put up on a pedestal where it is viewed as the ideal. White privilege is walking down the street knowing that people around you do not assume that you are on welfare, uneducated, a criminal or immoral. White privilege is not having mainly negative stereotypes exist about your race. White privilege exists when you are given the opportunity to make mistakes and not be perfect. What I have listed does not begin to touch on the level of white privilege that exists in this society. It may seem like these rights are granted to all of us as Americans, but unfortunately only a small segment of our society enjoys them and that segment is solely made up of whites. As for affirmative action, countless studies have shown that this policy benefits white women much more than it has benefitted blacks. When a sports broadcaster is hired and she happens to be a white woman, affirmative action has everything to do with her hiring. In that instance, the employer is making an attempt to diversify an all- white male workplace, whhich exists in most high-paying professions. I am an attorney and I know that my profession is dominated by white males. Therefore, when I read a law firm bragging about recent hirings of women in an attempt to sell itself, it is because of an 'affirmative action' that these hirings took place. More white women need to come out and be in support of this policy being that you are benefited the most by it. Racism, today, is so subtle that as a white woman it is very hard to see how you are the recipient of white privilege on a daily and minute-by-minute basis.
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Name : Sara, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Catholic, Age : 26, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, Occupation : Attorney, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, First of all your looking at it the wrong way. Don't think about you being white and her being black think of it as having a friend. Wait hold up are you wanting to have a black friend because you never had one and you obligated to? Shut I hope not cause no luck would come out of this relationship, you might get stepped on in the process. Be yourself tell her what's up, tell her your interesting in being her freind and you think you two could do good for eachother. But whatever you do dont I repeat dont look at it as 'having a black friend'.
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Name : Simone-Prim28011, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 18, City : Albuquerque, State : NM Country : United States, What are you talking about 'black privilege?' White women benefit from affirmative action as well as people of color. And you will never be pulled over or followed around in a store because of your race. We need affirmative action because it is the only way a white person will even look at my resume. We need the organizations so that we can keep our sanity living in a racist society. White privilege is alive and well.
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Name : Lenni, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 24, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, If you had to ask how to approach a Black woman, then that tells me you're not ready to be friends with one. Your comfort level with people who are different from you is shaky, at best. Learn to appreciate the differences of other ethnic and cultural groups, and you'll have no problem reaching out.
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Name : RhondaOutlaw, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 41, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, Occupation : Account Representative, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, I stumbled across this site on accident, but i just want to get something straight with each of you, YOU HAVE NO WHITE PRIVILEGE, and as an African American Male personally not only am i offended, but you should be ashamed of your self, i dont understand where you get off thinking your better then any one, hell for all you know her family could own the house your living in. as a side note that actually happened, with one of the kids i went to school with, he got upset and said i should be a slave, it just so happens not only do my parents own the $400,000 house his parents were renting from us in LA but also 3 others. Seriously you need to put the race thing aside.
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Name : not provided, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Baptist, Age : 18, City : Beverly Hills, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Parents Own Realesate, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 
JtParticipant
Sometimes when I am out I make a specific attempt to speak to other races. I will simply say hello or make a comment about what is going on. However, somtimes they dont speak english. I think its cool to want to know other cultures.
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Name : Jt, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 33, City : long beach, State : CA Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 
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