[Yuna]

I wonder if other dark-skinned black women have trouble attracting guys, even dark-skinned black guys. I've had many black guys tell me they think that 'light-skinned women are just prettier.' How do dark-skinned women maintain their self-esteem surrounded by all this media that convinces everyone of this?

User Detail :  

Name : Yuna, Gender : F, Age : 17, City : Queens, State : NY Country : United States, 

[Gregory-H21587]

I'm not a woman, but I wanted to put in my 2 cents. I find women attractive on an individual basis. Dark skin or light skin really makes no difference to me, I find them both equally beautiful. Just cuz some brothers buy into stereotypes doesn't mean we're all like that. And I'm light skinned...

User Detail :  

Name : Gregory-H21587, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 23, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, Occupation : law student, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, 

[Jennifer R.]

Dark skinned black women can maintain their self-esteem by taking a flip through Essence magazine and other black publications. In those pages, you will see many heartbreakingly beautiful women who are nearly as dark as onyx. Further, there are a lot of people out there, of all colors, who can see this beauty. Those who can't, even though their number may seem large, are not people whose opinions you need to respect. Build a fortress within yourself where *you* define yourself, your beauty, who you are. Accentuate your beauty. Celebrate it with reverence and dignity. Value yourself. Even when it seems that you're alone. Self respect, kindness, and intelligence are more successful in attracting the right kind of people than the most alabaster skin in the world. ______________________________________________-

User Detail :  

Name : Jennifer R., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Humanist, Age : 29, City : Saint Paul, State : MN Country : United States, Occupation : Writer/Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[THERESA]

BEING A BLACK OVERWEIGHT WOMAN, IF NOT FOR MY LIGHT SKIN I DONT THINK I'D ATTRACT A QUARTER OF THE MEN WHO LOOK MY WAY.MY LIGHT SKINNED HUSBAND AND HIS FRIENDS COMMENT THAT THEY DONT WANT ANY WOMAN BLACKER THEN THEMSELVES.AS FAR AS MEN... I THINK THEY HAVE IT MUCH EASIER.MY BEST FRIEND'S HUSBAND IS VERY DARK...AND VERY UNFAITHFUL. SO APPARENTLY IT'S LESS OF A PROMBLEM FOR BLACK MEN.

User Detail :  

Name : THERESA, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Pentecostal, Age : 30, City : FT.LAUDERDALE, State : FL Country : United States, Occupation : LICENSED NURSE, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Middle class, 

[Shanna T.]

While I don't have any trouble attracting men, I have had many men tell me, 'You're really attractive...for a dark-skinned woman.' And, while this is meant as a compliment, I can't tell you how offended I am because I know these men really believe that darker women aren't as attractive as light-skinned ones. I happen to prefer dark-skinned men, but light-skinned ones are just as attractive. As for the self-esteem thing...I think that has to do with each individual. When I was younger I was called everything from midnight to a burnt chocolate chip cookie. For a while it bothered me. Then one day I realized that, while I prefer darker men, I found men of all shades to be attractive and knew there had to be others who felt the same. I think growing up being teased about being a darker person is hurtful...but it makes you a stronger, better person when you overcome.

User Detail :  

Name : Shanna T., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Baptist, Age : 21, City : Oxford, State : MS Country : United States, Social class : Middle class, 

[Gloria-W21509]

There have been instances when dark-complected men have told me I was too light to date. I don't think all men feel this way, just some of the ignorant ones who don't feel good about themselves and want to make someone else feel bad. Or maybe it's their way of protecting their fragile male egos. You just keep your head up and you will eventually meet the right person who will like you for who you are, not your complexion.

User Detail :  

Name : Gloria-W21509, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Baptist, City : Atlanta, State : GA Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, 

[Shayla P.]

I agree that guys find light-skinned women 'prettier.' My cousin is a very pretty light-skinned girl who has no trouble finding guy. On the other hand, I'm just as cute as she is (actually even cuter), and I can't seem to find a decent guy because of my complexion. Most guys just tell me the lighter a woman is, the prettier she is. Also, lighter women have more advantages than dark women. Why? I wish I knew.

User Detail :  

Name : Shayla P., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 18, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[KC-Tate26520]

In my neck of the woods, it's the medium and dark complected ppl who are getting the attention. These ppl look like the very ones you'd see in FUBU commercials, Vibe magazine, and BET videos. The dark, urbane look is very 'in' (Well at least it is in my locale.) Perhaps it's the hip-hop influence that is making this happen.

User Detail :  

Name : KC-Tate26520, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 28, City : Jacksonville, State : FL Country : United States, Occupation : paralegal, 

[I. Cade]

I am also darker-skinned. I think that the area you live in and the type of crowd you associate with has an impact. In L.A. I feel that the aesthetic favors living barbie dolls . For blacks this means black barbie dolls. Stay positive, and you will attract good things.

User Detail :  

Name : I. Cade, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Catholic, Age : 22, City : Los Angeles, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : graduate, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

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