Curious and confused

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  • #10412

    Jennifer31072
    Participant
    I'm a straight, married mother of one, however, I keep having recurring dreams/fantasies of making love to a woman. I realize that many women are curious as to how such an experience would be, although many don't admit to it. This is my second marriage, and it's not going too well. Sometimes I wonder if it's due to the fact that I'm confused about my sexuality. I enjoy sex with my husband and it's very fulfilling, and I am attracted to men, however, I get extremely aroused just thinking about being with a woman. Is this normal? If I try it once, would this curiousity be satisifed? This has been going on since I was about 18, and the feelings have intensified rather than diminished.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Jennifer31072, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Asian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 28, City : Denver, State : CO Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #38859

    Mawk
    Participant
    Why don't you just go for it? It's the only way to satisfy yourself.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Mawk, Gender : M, Age : 29, City : Norwich, State : NA Country : United Kingdom, 
    #37992

    Anna
    Participant
    I'll give the same advice that I gave to another woman in your situation. Go to a PFLAG meeting. To find a PFLAG chapter in your area, go to http://www.pflag.org. PFLAG stands for parents, friends and families of lesbians and gays. They will be supportive and non-judgmental. I do not suggest cheating on your husband, to just 'try it once.' A random encounter could bring a host of problems. You need to sort out your feelings, to stand firm in who you are. You need support and love. PFLAG will help. Good luck.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Anna, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 31, City : Seattle, State : WA Country : United States, Occupation : Technology, 
    #15458

    Sarah R.
    Member
    Many women who later identify as Lesbians have been married at some point. Since I have known I was gay since I was in H.S. I can't speak very well to that part of your experience. The only thing I would say is be very careful about acting on your feelings. I don't think you should bank on the idea that a one-tme experience will satisfy your curiosity it will probably just end up making things messy and painful for all involved. Good luck with your journey. It can be difficult and painful to figure out sexuality questions when you are already involved with someone. You have a lot of courage to be so honest and open about yourself!

    User Detail :  

    Name : Sarah R., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Buddhist, Age : 35, City : Eugene, State : OR Country : United States, Occupation : self-employed, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper class, 
    #39874

    Kerry
    Member
    I can only speak to my own experience. I am married to a man, but consider myself lesbian. I met him before I knew I loved women. When I told him of my new attraction, we talked about it. We had an experience with a woman, and it was wonderful. She was not interested in a relationship, so that was the end of it for her. It may be something you can do once, and be happy having done. It may be something you wish to continue. For me, I need to find that special gal to complete my life. I want a long-term relationship. I am looking for a three-part marriage, and I realize it will take a very large amount of work, but I think it's worth it.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Kerry, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Pagan, Age : 29, City : Ventura, State : CA Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 
    #42773

    Ann23802
    Participant
    If you've had these sorts of thoughts and feelings for women for 10 years, maybe it's time to step back and analyze the situation. Take some time for yourself and explore the possibilities. I understand where you are coming from - I am in an exclusive relationship with a man (I'm female) and have only dated men. I find my partner extremely sexually attractive, along with a select number of other men. I also find some women attractive. Although I haven't figured everything out yet, I have come to a couple of conclusions concerning my taste: I generally find certain types of 'people' attractive rather than a specific gender. Also, I feel that I am more 'emotionally' attracted to women than sexually. Maybe this is the case with you.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Ann23802, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : spiritual person, Age : 23, City : Nowhere, State : GA Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
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