[Jesse]

How do women view a man who’s been to prison? Will they still date a man after they find out he has a record?

User Detail :  

Name : Jesse, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 24, City : Warren, State : MI, Country : United States, Occupation : engineer, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Middle class, 

[Robin29583]

While we as an educated and moral society are supposed to support the notion of rehabilitation of criminals, it is a difficult thing to fully espouse on an individual level. Do I believe that people make mistakes and are capable of changing for the better over time? Yes. However, I do know there is a fairly high rate of repeat offenses after the incarcerant is released. Because of this and because I believe the majority of laws are reasonable, I would find it really hard to establish a personal relationship with someone I knew had broken the law and might do it again. Some crimes are ‘victimless,’ while the majority are not, and I don’t feel I could fully trust someone who had hurt (physically, economically, etc.) someone else, because their crime indicates they operate under a much different moral system than I do. Above all, people in a relationship should have a shared belief in what is right and wrong. With few exceptions (such as being sent to prison for kicking the crap out of someone who you caught assaulting a child), commission of a crime is a strong indicator that the felon and I don’t share the same moral beliefs.

User Detail :  

Name : Robin29583, Gender : F, Age : 25, City : Pittsburgh, State : PA, Country : United States, 

[Lucy22378]

For me, the decision to date a man who had been in prison would depend on the circumstances. What type of crime was he convicted of? Was he guilty? What has he done to get his life on a positive track? What is he doing now? How did I find out he was in prison? Was it something he tried to hide, or was he straight up about it? I have never been in the position of deciding whether to date a man who has been in prison, but I have known several men who have been in prison. Some are basically decent guys who got caught up in some bad stuff, some have turned their lives around and are doing good. Others are nothing but trouble, and any smart woman would stay as far away from them as they can.

User Detail :  

Name : Lucy22378, Gender : F, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Age : 26, City : San Jose, State : CA, Country : United States, Occupation : Engineer, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Kier26345]

I think it depends on the people and the crime. I have been assaulted, so if someone were in prison for that, I would probably not want to date them.

User Detail :  

Name : Kier26345, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 17, City : Sauk City, State : WI, Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[Annette]

I work at a prison and see many female visitors coming in to visit inmates. During this past year, I’ve seen five different female staff members forced to resign because of involvement (ranging from notes to sex) with inmates. Of course, there is a high social stigma associated with having been a prisoner. Most men would prefer to put this in the past and not let others know about their history. Personally, I appreciate honesty in men, including owning up to responsibility for past mistakes. I dated an ex-con without knowing it. He was very successful in commercial real estate; I would never had guessed. He told me a few months after we began dating, and so I knew him for who he was. It didn’t change my opinion of him in the least. He had been in on a residential burglary with a friend when he had been addicted to cocaine. However, had he told me he had been arrested for rape, domestic violence, lewd and lacivious behavior or sexual crimes, I would have steered clear of this man. (As a result of working at the prison and sitting in on male sex offender groups, I’ve come to see that unfortunately, most sex offenders – not all – are just like any other male with problems. Some guys drink, others take power and find solace in ways that hurt others. Inmates are only exaggerations of social problems that exist on the outside. Ultimately, my advice is to be honest about your history at an appropriate time. Don’t procrastinate too long; this would be a form of dishonesty. Just find the right time. Depending on your crime, most women would accept you if they still see you as a good person inside. Don’t carry shame or hide too much from those close to you; this only causes isolation and a potential repeat of anti-social behavior.

User Detail :  

Name : Annette, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 41, City : Boise, State : ID, Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[K. Koffie-Lart]

I just can not see my self dating anyone that has been to prison. I assume that they have participated in sex with another male, and what supposedly straight guy is going to be honest about that. So I just will not do it.

User Detail :  

Name : K. Koffie-Lart, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 19, City : Silver Spring, State : MD, Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, 

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