Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences - This topic has 9 replies, 9 voices, and was last updated 20 years, 8 months ago by
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Why do black women overlook or disregard black men in wheelchairs? Every man in a wheelchair is not helpless.
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Name : NasD, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : Paralyzed, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, City : Carbondale, State : IL, Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,I don’t think it is fair to categorize all black women as not giving disabled guys a chance. I personally would not want to date a person in a wheel chair. Let’s be honest, everyone prefers to get a perfect package in a partner. If I fall in love with a guy who is disabled, I would not deny my heart, but I prefer a perfect man. It is easier for disabled men to find partners than disabled women. so don’t give up.
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Name : Ify21374, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, City : Miami, State : FL, Country : United States,I think it is not a matter of race but of socioeconomic class. A majority of black people fall into the lower socioeconomic class. People from that class tend to be less tolerant of anyone who is not like them, maybe from lack of education or dissatisfaction with their station in life. I’ve also noticed that many black people tend to be harsh in their ridicule of homosexuals. I guess if you feel like you’re on the lower part of the social ladder, it makes you feel better to step on whoever is below you.
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Name : Edward25580, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 31, City : Durham, State : NC, Country : United States, Occupation : Teacher, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I am physically disabled, and though not confined to a wheelchair, I use one on a regular basis. Don’t let anyone tell you you are less than perfect because you are in a wheelchair. I resent the previous answer to your question. Maybe the responder should place himself/herself in that person’s position before categorizing disabled people as less than perfect. Perfection is unattainable unless you are the Almighty. If you keep searching for perfection, that person in the wheelchair – the one you passed up – may be the closest thing to perfection you may get.
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Name : Tykee, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : SLE Diagnosed, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Baptist, Age : 22, City : Jacksonville, State : FL, Country : United States, Occupation : Administrative, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class,I think your answer has absolutely nothing to do with the man’s question. He asked why it is that black women overlook black men in wheelchairs. In today’s society, it is disturbing for some African-American women to see other African-American men with women of other ethnicities. There is a growing population of African-American men in prisons, so that takes away a large part of the eligible men. There are also those men who choose to date and marry women who are not African American, and that can be frustrating as well. This is especially true when the men are prosperous. However, prosperity is not the only driving force behind what African-American women look for in a relationship. What the man was saying was that if African-American women are looking for eligible men, to not overlook men in wheelchairs. And I don’t think it is only African-American women who overlook men in wheelchairs – I think most women do. But it’s not because they are imperfect, or poor, or low in class, but because disabilities are propagandized as inabilities, and no one wants to be with someone who is incapable of anything. I think the best way to turn the situation around is to start having more roles on TV and movies with wheelchair-bound people as stars.
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Name : Angela24955, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Baptist, Age : 21, City : Nashville, State : TN, Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,Good Heavens! The answers above are amazing!!! Has the whole world gone insane?? The answer is … a lot of people (PEOPLE … not just women!) don’t look at a person in a wheelchair! They don’t SEE the person! They see the chair! It has NOTHING to do with socioeconomics (for God’s sake!!), nor the colour of your skin! Granted, there are some people (again PEOPLE!) who will not be confortable dating someone who is disabled (or black for that matter), but there will be many who are – you just have to find them. Anyone ever seen Stephen Hawking, the world’s greatest physicist? – author of ‘A Brief History of Time’, Cerebral Palsy, completely disabled, twice married and definitely NOT a looker! Now there is a man with personality! Hiding your dating failures behind your chair and colour is a cop-out – you have to make people see and know YOU!
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Name : siouxZQ27877, City : Merrickville, State : NA, Country : Canada,Well, I hope I’m not the first to tell you that there is no such animal as a perfect man. I haven’t always been in a chair. I thought I was happly married until I was injuried. My ex-wife decided she wanted a perfect man, when I was in ICU. I still look the same I just came walk anymore. So when you met that perfect man, think about this response to you. Just in case one of you might not stay PERFECT.
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Name : NasD, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : Paralyzed, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, City : Carbondale, State : IL, Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : Over 4 Years of College,I have black men yell things at me from the cars they drive, while black women help me get things off of shelves in stores.
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Name : Jeff Cobner, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : Blind and wheelchair, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 25, City : Richmond, State : VA, Country : United States, Occupation : College Student, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Lower class,Don’t rule all of us black females out. I’m 22, graduated last year with a B.A double major in communications and journalism, and have been with a man in a wheelchair for 2 1/2 years. I’ll admit it was frightening at first (not the chair, but the prospect of having a relationship with him). However, the funny thing is I asked him out – he was just attractive to me from the beginning. My family has a hard time with it, but I know that’s where I want to be. So don’t think we all disregard or overlook you guys.
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Name : Kesha, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 22, City : New York, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : state filing analyst, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I love black men in wheelchairs……You shouldn’t sterotype all black women to be this way. I am an educated blackwoman, med school bound, who has been attracted to black men in wheelchairs before. Its all about how one carries themself…….
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Name : Lin, City : Chicago, State : IL, Country : United States,
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