[Joe]

Jamie, There could be many reasons for this kind of behavior. The important part to realize is that people who are two-faced like this view that way of life as inescapable. They 'must' protect their race. They 'believe in their hearts' that non-whites are inferior. Blacks, Asians and Hispanics are 'the enemy'. Sadly, they cannot imagine that they can feel another way. It makes sense to them, even though they have experienced positive relationships that refutes their beliefs. Your 'friend' has learned that he has a place with these people, even though he personally has not found a reason to continue to be hateful. What your friend hasn't learned is that he can think for himself and have the confidence in himself to live without this fake and hateful 'support group'. The movies American History X and Pleasantville are great examples of his behavior.

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Name : Joe, City : Phoenix, State : AZ Country : United States, 

[Joe]

This is not the first time I've heard that Italian men don't find race an issue when dating. I sometimes wonder if it is the limitation that other men aren't interested or black women find Italians more attractive... anyway. I have dated maybe 6 black women in my life (never really kept count). I got engaged to a black girl named Erin but she died before the wedding. I hardly ever involved my family with any women that I dated except when it got serious. My family did not accept Erin. Erin's family was decent to me (with the exception of Grandma... she loved me and was wonderful). After her death, my family actually seemed relieved (which is one of the reasons why I haven't spoken to them in over ten years). Her family, except Grandma, didn't want to talk with me either. I feel that some men may wish to avoid the crap their families give them because they don't want it to make the relationship harder. I didn't care but I also felt like I was free to care and enjoy myself if they weren't in the picture. The real tell-tale sign would be, does he introduce you to friends and co-workers that he knows do not have a problem with inter-racial dating? If he doesn't, he has too much of a hangup about it and doesn't desearve to date you.

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Name : Joe, City : Phoenix, State : AZ Country : United States, 

[Joe]

Sadly, the term 'racist' has become a label equivalent to hatred. A true racist is someone who is proud of the race or group their ancestors come from, believes that the heritage of that race or group is important and must be protected, and believes that those of the same race or group have an inherent relationship because of the shared background. Unfortunately, people confuse bigotry with racism because of the lengths some will go to achieve the criteria listed above. Racism turns into bigotry when the person is willing to achieve the above goals at the expense of another's right to do the same. If you accept my definition and you had never thought of that before, how does that change your view of some whites? Does it change your view of some blacks? If it doesn't do either, I believe it should have, or you're not being honest with yourself.

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Name : Joe, City : Phoenix, State : AZ Country : United States, 

[Joe]

Jennifer has figured out an excellent way to define the usage of the Word 'Nigga'. It's very intelligent and extremely accurate. It is hurtful, however, that instead of going beyond the past and finding ways to mature ourselves and our society, we continue to believe that labels like these help define us as individuals. How can anyone learn a new way of thinking if it is always compromised by a wasteful use of old thinking? The difference between 'Nigga' and 'Nigger' is inconsequential and not worthy of discussion. But the fact that there exist a difference between races and their usage of the word... the consequences are enormous. How will you feel when the day comes that everybody understands your definition of the word 'Nigga' and will use it with only the best of intentions? Can you imagine how you would feel when everyone you know calls you their Nigga because they 'care about you'? Please don't ask me to call you that. My respect for anyone is better shown with labels that build and not limit.

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Name : Joe, City : Phoenix, State : AZ Country : United States, 

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