[Lynn22504]

Why do white people potty train their kids so late, while black people train them earlier?

User Detail :  

Name : Lynn22504, Gender : F, City : Memphis, State : TN, Country : United States, 

[Kristina26246]

I never recognized any correlation between race/culture and potty-training. I do think, however, that stingy people or those with lower incomes are more likely to potty train early because daycare for potty-trained infants is easier to find and significantly cheaper. Otherwise, I think it’s pretty much an individual thing.

User Detail :  

Name : Kristina26246, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 23, City : Washington, State : DC, Country : United States, Occupation : Word Processor, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Nyla]

Black people feel you should not be at the age where you are able to walk, talk and play, yet cannot take the time to determine when you need to use the lavatory. Another reason is that boys, by age 3-4, and girls, by age 2-3, are too old to be peeing on themselves. Besides, what’s the use of buying diapers when your child shouldn’t be still in them, anyway? It’s a waste of money and time.

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Name : Nyla, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 17, City : Willingboro, State : NJ, Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[Rhonda-P-Outlaw29980]

First of all, daycare, unless subsidized, is NOT cheaper. In 1995 I paid $150 per week for my son to attend daycare (it was more than a daycare center, it was a learning center for children ages 2 to 5). Today, the school charges nearly $200 per week. Second, I started potty training my son at 18 months old. By the time he was two, he was wearing underwear, and except for an accident here and there, he was fully trained. Cheap day care had nothing to do with it. I just didn’t think it would be cute for a boy who could speak intelligently, to still be walking around in urine soaked diapers. I should also mention that at age 1, I took away his bottle and trained him to use a cup. The stroller was put away at age two (he could walk). His crib was taken down and replaced with a child’s bed. Baby toys were taken away and replaced with toys designed to teach (See & Say, etc). So you see, the cost of daycare is a non issue. It’s about raising intelligent, independent children. You simply do not treat a two year old like a baby, for he is no longer a baby…he is a toddler. If he can walk and talk, he needs to come out of diapers, sleep in a regular bed, no more bottles and pacifiers. That simple.

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Name : Rhonda-P-Outlaw29980, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 42, City : Laurelton, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : Account Representative, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Shani G.]

Though i am childless, I believe that we want our children to become less dependent on us in certain aspects. Also, diapers are expensive, and the quicker we can get our children out of them the less money we have to spend on it.

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Name : Shani G., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 19, City : Stone Mountain, State : GA, Country : United States, Occupation : student, Education level : 4 Years of College, 

[Bill]

I concur with Nyla from Willingboro, for the most. I would only add that the tendency to allow one’s children to ‘proceed at their own pace’ is not exclusive to any one race, ethnicity or social stratum. I see it too frequently. I think that rather than help the child, it hurts them in the long run. They grow up not knowing how to deal with even minimal pressure; they feel wronged when they’re asked to extend themselves in any way. Know what I mean?

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Name : Bill, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 52, City : SAN JOSE, State : CA, Country : United States, Occupation : engineer, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Michael28931]

Show me a study that clearly indicates that black people potty train their children earlier. I have never noticed any difference between ‘who’ gets potty trained ‘when’. And by the way, white people don’t like urinating on themselves, either.

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Name : Michael28931, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 33, City : Atlanta, State : GA, Country : United States, Social class : Middle class, 

[Demetrice]

That’s a really good question that I only recently realized was an issue. My son is 21 months old and just recently starting saying ‘Poo-poo’ when his diaper was dirty. So I got the potty chair out of storage and started teaching him to use it. When I mentioned it at work (proud that he was finally telling me his diaper was dirty) people were surprised that I was doing it at this age. They rattled off their 3, 4, and even 5-year old training experiences. I had no idea this could be a cultural thing, but one woman had to potty train her son to enroll him in Kindergarten. That baffles me. If they can say ‘Poo-Poo’ they can learn to head to the potty when they feel it coming on.

User Detail :  

Name : Demetrice, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 43, City : Sacramento, State : CA, Country : United States, Occupation : Marketing, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Karen]

Black women( like me have not traditionally had the luxury of staying home with our babies. We have had to work. It was just plain easier to find daycare for a child who does not need his diapers changed.

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Name : Karen, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 47, City : rochester, State : NY, Country : United States, Occupation : utilities service, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Marvin-F]

In my experience, black people have greater expectations from their children as relates to basic skills at an early age. Black children usually spend less time in strollers, eat regular food earlier and are potty trained earlier than white children. Of my 3 children, only one of them wasn’t fully potty trained by the age of 2 and then only because he is a very hard-headed boy. At the age of three I expect them to keep their own rooms cleaned up and expect them to keep up with their own shoes, coats & etc. Possibly historically, black people have had to mature at an earlier age and we still carry across that need for early development to our children.

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Name : Marvin-F, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Mormon, Age : 35, City : Kansas City, State : MO, Country : United States, Occupation : IT, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Asia D.]

I agree. If a child can walk and hold a conversation then there is no reason for that child to not be potty trained. Plus by 2 and 3 that child is pretty much eating the same food you are so changing diapers becomes more unpleasent.

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Name : Asia D., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Seventh-Day Adventist, Age : 21, City : Phoenix, State : AZ, Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Upper middle class, 

[Daryl28656]

Probably because more white women have the time to wipe their babies’ bottoms than many black women have the privilege to, between 3 jobs and rising out of poverty and generations of slavery. They probably tell their kids,- ‘Hey – I have enough sh-t on my hands already – better use your own!!’

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Name : Daryl28656, Gender : M, Race : Asian, Age : 30, City : Fort Worth, State : TX, Country : United States, 

[Marque]

Actually, It is not only black people who train their children early. Probably 75% of western Europeans and 90% of eastern Europeans potty train early. ‘Us’ Caucasians unfortunatly do not ‘have’ the time to potty train because we are so busy. I personally think it’s wrong (earlier is better). Potty training is happening later and later; diaper sizes are getting larger and larger.

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Name : Marque, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 33, City : Bellevue, State : WA, Country : United States, Occupation : Self Employed, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper class, 

[Raquel]

I’ve noticed this phenomenon in the practice of breastfeeding as well. Black women tend to either not breast-feed altogether or will stop breast feeding far sooner than their white counterparts. There is a stigma among our race that having your infants/toddlers hang on to too many crutches of dependence is stifling to their growth and progression. Pacifiers, bottles, breast-feeding and diapers are 4 areas that we tend to want to rid our children of as early as possible because not only do they weigh the parent down, they weigh the child down. Having a 3-yr old still hooked on a pacifier or bottle is like having a 3-yr old hooked on crack. They throw tantrums and are hard to handle if they feel like they absolutely have to have their bottle when they should be well on to other developmental stages in life. I guess we also think it’s hard enough for black kids to progress in America so why keep them attached to unnecessary ‘baby things’. Perhaps it’s a tiny bit selfish of the parent to want to get rid of the appendage of a diaper bag or of having to go through those 1,000 extra steps needed to change a diaper as opposed to pulling up and down some underwear, but why would any mother really want her child hindered far beyond the reasonably necessary time period? We (black mothers) tend to want our children far less dependent on us as soon as possible because sometimes life has a way of happening and we don’t want to leave behind dependent children. It all boils down to when you’re getting ready to leave the house in the morning to take your child to daycare, I’d rather have to think to myself, ‘Did I remember to put my child’s panties on,’ instead of, ‘Did I remember to pack the diapers, the wipes, the ointment, the powder, the plastic bag, the changing pad, etc.’ Haste in this case is not waste, but hassle-free time-management at its best.

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Name : Raquel, Gender : F, Age : 31, City : Houston, State : TX, Country : United States, 

[Alexandra Castle]

Not to bring too much scientific data into it. It is true that black parents spend more time on practical child maintenance rather than reading, encouraging ‘happiness’ (whatever that is), etc., because they are frequently working 2 or 3 jobs to make ends meet. It isn’t the ethnicity – you find the same thing in other races that are in the same situation – but economic necessity. They don’t have money to spend on paper diapers and time to spend on washing cloth ones all the time.

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Name : Alexandra Castle, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 53, City : Raleigh, State : NC, Country : United States, Occupation : Psychologist, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

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