[Joe]

My ex-wife continues to sleep with our 10-year-old son when he stays at her house. This is not a sexual thing. His mother refuses to put his bed together at her house and still thinks it is OK for him to sleep with her. Is this unusual, or am I worried about nothing?

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Name : Joe, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Unity School of Christianity, Age : 46, City : St. Augustine, State : FL Country : United States, Occupation : Horticulturist, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Ann L. Lowenstein]

She's WAY over-attached, and it might not be overtly sexual, but there's a serious 'ick' factor, nonetheless, which will only get 'ickier' as your son gets closer to puberty. Even in the absence of a sexual motive, she's fostering an unhealthy attachment in him at an age when he should be developing his independence. She has to let him sleep in his own bed, and she in hers, PERIOD. If she won't agree to this, it might be time to get the authorities involved, even though I'm usually against that sort of thing.

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Name : Ann L. Lowenstein, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Animist, Age : 37, City : K.C., State : MO Country : United States, Occupation : Administrative Assistant, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Copeland, L]

In my opinion, your ex-wife is forming a closer bond. The bond of mother and child is considered to be far more heart-reaching then any other relationship in the family. The mother has the power to impact her child for life. Your ex-wife feels it's not wrong to sleep with her 10-year-old son as long as the tie produces a healthy relationship. And I concur, as long as the relationship refrains from a sexual thing, it can only be a motherly thing.

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Name : Copeland, L, City : Greenville, State : MS Country : United States, 

[Sheri R.]

I would be worried. 10-year-old boys are coming into their sexual maturity soon and they don't need to wake up with their mom lying next to them. My aunt did the same thing, slept in the same bed with her son regularly until he was about 12. The boy decided to end it, not my aunt. Maybe your son will do the same.

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Name : Sheri R., Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 41, City : san francisco, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : writer, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[CraigMcLennan]

I slept with my grandmother until I was 12. It was a comfort thing for me. I don't think it's entirely UNhealthy, but if your son is uncomfortable with it and it continues, that's when there might be a problem.

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Name : CraigMcLennan, Gender : Male, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 21, City : Duncan, State : NA Country : Canada, Occupation : Student/sales associate, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[Anita]

Probably, since I take it he's not at her house all the time, she is trying to 'soak in' as much of her boy as possible when she does have him! It's time to start separating ... my son was always allowed in our bed (after about 10 years old) if he was truly scared from storms or a bad dream or if he was sick. She needs to realize that, unfortunatly, it's not all about her and her needs, and maturity-wise, it's time to start letting go.

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Name : Anita, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 49, City : Indianapolis, State : IN Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[RachelHall]

I have a 10 yr old son, and let me tell you our bond is so close, but not because I sleep with him. We have a trust that no one will ever understand, but he hasn't slept in the same bed as me in 8 1/2 yrs. I don't think there is anything wrong with it as long as it is not sexual, but then again does the ex have a man in her life now, or is she trying to make the son older than what he really is? One day he will "pop up" and if it is not handled in the right way, he can be scarred for life. He needs a male role model in life especially right now being at a very awkward age from boy to young man. Good Luck!! Rachel Hall

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Name : RachelHall, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 30, City : Flint, State : MI Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, 

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