Blacks’ outrage at being “bumped”

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 31 total)
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  • #8182

    Mark
    Participant
    I had to post after something happened to me tonight for the hundredth time. I've lived in Manhattan for 18 years, and there's one thing I've learned about living in this crowded, fast-paced city: people are going to bump into you. On the street, in the subway, entering buildings - there are so many people moving so fast that occasionally someone bumps into you. Most people just accept this as part of living in a busy metropolis, and move on. Except African Americans. Every time I bump into a black person, they get extremely upset, and yell at me. I wouldn't comment on this, except that it has happened close to a hundred times since I moved here, and I have to say in all honesty that only blacks get upset. Everyone else - whites, Asians, Latinos, Middle Easterners - just move on. But African Americans invariably start yelling something like, 'What do you think you're doing??' Uh, I was trying to make the subway and I bumped into you - happens all the time. So what? Why is it that only blacks get ticked off? I'm serious - I have noticed this for years now, but never commented on it for fear of being racist, which I am always careful to avoid. But I can't deny that it's true. What's up with this?

    User Detail :  

    Name : Mark, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 49, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #44294

    Sam-R
    Participant
    Many blacks know that whites are basically afraid of them and whites will avoid confrontation. They like to intimidate you and probably would back off if you became aggressive, assuming that you are physically as big as the black person. For your own health, just move on.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Sam-R, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, City : Ft. Myers, State : FL Country : United States, 
    #42777

    Ann
    Participant
    Thanks to Malcom X and the Rev. Jesse Jackson and the Rev. Al Sharpton and others and their litany of hate and intolerance, a disproportionately large number of blacks, especially well-off blacks in big cities like New York and Chicago, view themselves as 'victims of racism' and all whites and Asians as 'racist oppressors,' so every accidental bump or jostle is instantly elevated from 'whoops' to 'racist assault,' and is reacted to accordingly. If you get the chance at some point, sit back and watch how these same individuals respond to being bumped or jostled by another black. You'll frequently see a huge difference in attitude. But don't comment on it. After all, that would be 'racist.'

    User Detail :  

    Name : Ann, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Animist, Age : 39, City : Kansas City, State : MO Country : United States, Occupation : Executive Assistant, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #44057

    Asia D.
    Participant
    I can only respond to my personal experiences. I'm a 21-year-old African American female, and when I'm in a public crowded place and I bump someone, out of respect I turn and say sorry just so the person knows it wasn't on purpose. It's rude when someone doesn't take the extra 5 seconds to turn and apologize. When someone bumps into me I don't get offended because 99 percent of the time it's not on purpose, but it's nice to get the extra reassurance.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Asia D., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Seventh-Day Adventist, Age : 21, City : Phoenix, State : AZ Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Upper middle class, 
    #14128

    Kim H.
    Participant
    First, the history of each grouping of people of color is different. In other words, not every ethnic group is going to react the same way to certain situations because our history and events are different. That is why whites need to stop lumping us all together. Whites should stop assuming we will react the same way. Class figures prominently into this as well. History in America will tell you that blacks were considered invisible over a number of centuries. That's where the word 'spook' (in pertaining to blacks) comes from. This was first brought about when blacks were servants. The whites could talk and conduct business in front of the black servant because the servant was considered invisible. When you bump into a black person, there is the perception that 'You don't see me! Because if you did you wouldn't have bumped into me.'

    Second, black people do not like an invasion of their personal space. To get so close that you are touching when there is no family, friendship, or lover relationship involved is almost seen as an aggressive act or affront.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Kim H., Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Humanist, Age : 43, City : Minneapolis, State : MN Country : United States, Occupation : Actress, Playwright and Director, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #16212

    Christine20387
    Participant
    It may be seen as a sign of disrespect to bump into them and not say excuse me. That, and the way people treat some blacks: as if their feelings don't matter, or as if a little annoyance here and there isn't a big thing. It can make them feel as if you are trying to be mean or rude.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Christine20387, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, City : Hartford, State : CT Country : United States, Social class : Lower middle class, 
    #26220
    I'll tell you why. I detest rudeness. When I bump into someone I have the decency to say, 'excuse me' or 'pardon me' or 'I'm so sorry'. I expect the same courtesy. Also, if people watched where they were going, there would be a lot less bumping into people. I've lived and worked in New York all my adult life, and I don't bump into people because I watch where I'm going and I'm aware of and respectful of other people's personal space. Now, if you want to make this a racial thing, I'll add that white folks are among the rudest, most inconsiderate people I've had the displeasure of encountering. The subway is a hotbed of rude white folks. I dress nicely and don't appreciate someone sitting next to me, or standing over me, drinking that nasty coffee. And some of you insist on reading a newspaper, regardless of how crowded the train is. And let's not even discuss white women who insist on tossing their hair in people's faces. I was raised to be polite and considerate of others, and have no tolerance for rude people.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Rhonda-P-Outlaw22323, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 43, City : Laurelton, State : NY Country : United States, Occupation : Account Rep, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #22397
    I believe it has a lot to do with common courtesy. And I do not believe it's only blacks that have a problem with being bumped. It may be that blacks are more outspoken and often react verbally to it. Look, if you would just say, 'Excuse me!' or 'I'm sorry' next time, then you may not get that reaction.

    User Detail :  

    Name : BronzeTrophy, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Religion : Baptist, Age : 24, City : Anniston, State : AL Country : United States, Occupation : Registered Nurse, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower class, 
    #18051

    JR
    Participant
    The pressures of racism and not having any coping skill to deal with it make some of us very sensitive. I think in the minds of those blacks you have bumped into, the bump is another injustice done to them by "the white man," but this time they can react to it - and usually with all the frustration that has been building up.

    User Detail :  

    Name : JR, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 44, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Occupation : Govt, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #45187

    Jill
    Participant
    I live in London and it's the same there except that I haven't noticed any particular race gets annoyed when you bump into them - maybe it's the British reserve. I personally do get really ticked off when people who are obviously not looking where they're going and will occasionally tell them off. I've spent time in NYC as well, and if you look where you're going you're less likely to bump into people - maybe it's just that African Americans for whatever reason have the sense to remind you to look where you're going! I just wish more people would do the same. PS - Admit it : you were trying to make the subway and you were so absorbed in your important little life that you didn't notice anyone else - I've done the same thing and have learned not to. Try and slow down and have some consideration for others is what people are telling you - whatever race they are.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Jill, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 31, City : London, State : NA Country : United Kingdom, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #30861

    Bella20269
    Participant
    I think they get mad because you probably don't say 'sorry' or 'pardon me' or 'excuse me'. Nowhere in your post does it say you've ever apologized. Plus black folks have so many issues with white folks to begin with that the last thing they want is some white dude bumping into them who doesn't have the manners to apologize. A black guy who you bump into might be thinking that you don't like black folks and that's why you bumped him out of your way. As for me, I hate getting bumped. Hate it. Regardless of the race of the person who bumps me. But if they say 'sorry' or 'pardon me' after they hit me, I'm OK with it. I've noticed that in some cultures or nationalities bumping and pushing do not seem to be so offensive. Like you said, they accept it and move on. But that's not the way I was raised. If you bump someone, you at least say 'sorry' or something. It's really bad manners not to.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Bella20269, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Afro-Caribbean, Religion : Christian, Age : 33, City : Washington, State : DC Country : United States, Occupation : event coordinator, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Middle class, 
    #43158

    Pookie
    Participant
    I attended a large, crowded junior high school in Indiana. On a couple occasions I bumped into an African-American female schoolmate in the halls between classes, and each time the girl slapped me in the back of my head. I was 12. When I was 14 I got into a fight with one girl because she thought I got too close to her lunchtray. I was bullied by Caucasion kids and hit by the African-American kids, and I think everyone who hurt me had parents who taught them to be mean. Anyway, I think anyone who yells or hits when they are bumped into probably does so because they mistakenly learned that such behavior is appropriate.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Pookie, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 28, City : Bristol, State : IN Country : United States, Occupation : court reporter, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #24510

    Mr. Jones
    Participant
    Next time say you are sorry immediately or say excuse me before you come into close quarters. I am black male and at times we feel very much disrespected by society and that no one really cares how we feel; couple that with someone bumping into you, which is obviously disrespectful, and not saying excuse me, and it will make you upset. There is a book you should read called The Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison; it may help you to understand.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Mr. Jones, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 30, City : Columbus, State : OH Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 
    #36836

    Adele
    Participant
    Living in this country and being black, you sometimes feel disrespected because of the way you are sometimes treated. I feel that if you bump into someone it is most polite to say sorry. I have noticed that whites will not move over or will walk right into you without apologizing. If I bump into someone I was raised to always say sorry, even if I had to shout it down the street. It is just a matter of respecting someone's space and body.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Adele, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 42, City : PhiladelphiA, State : PA Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper class, 
    #24551

    Alaina R.
    Participant
    I completely understand what you are talking about. However, it usually is younger African Americans. I haven't found that it happens in the middle aged or older. You are correct, it does happen that you bump into people. The young African Americans do cop an attitude, and if they don't yell, they look at you like you are the biggest jerk for even being in the same area as them. I don't know what's up with that. However, if those same people bumped into you, they wouldn't have the common courtesy to say excuse me or even look at you.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Alaina R., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 25, City : Cincinnati, State : OH Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
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