Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences - This topic has 15 replies, 15 voices, and was last updated 21 years, 2 months ago by
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- Why do black people of all class levels act so irresponsibly when it comes to sex? I mean it is so crazy. The majority of black homes are headed by a single parent, in addition to the rise of HIV/AIDS that is spreading in our community. Yet black women don't force their men to use condoms. If they did, we wouldn't have the 'baby daddy' complex that is plaguing us. They also don't want to use birth control or other methods of pregnancy prevention. In the black community, do women have babies now just because it's a status symbol -- it shows at some point the woman was 'wanted' by a man? If this is the case, why are black women so man-driven, anyway? If these are not the reasons, then why do black women keep having these children when they know how to prevent them?
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Name : Kristina, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 20, City : Washington, State : DC Country : United States, Occupation : Transcriber, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,I found the phrasing of this question odd. You're black yourself. What do *you* think?User Detail :
Name : Jennifer31032, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 31, City : Saint Paul, State : MN Country : United States, Occupation : Non-profit, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,I think it might be in most black women's genetics. You obviously are an exception to the rule.User Detail :
Name : Dan-C27331, Gender : M, City : Omaha, State : NE Country : United States,I agree. I do not know what is so wrong with condom use. It's cool, and you can still enjoy sex. I know a woman who has four sons by four different men. I have no idea how she has ended up in that predicament. It's disheartening because our children and our community as a whole suffers terribly. Plus, our men are not stepping up to the plate and supporting their children in these situations. I have often wondered if, as a whole, men of other races and ethnicities are not just better fathers. I hate to take it to that extreme, but all I have to go on is what I witness in our community and outside our community.User Detail :
Name : KGreen, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : New Age/Metaphysical, Age : 31, City : Dayton, State : OH Country : United States, Occupation : Marketing, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class,The answers go back all the way to slavery and the destruction of the family structure. Back then, black men were valued by how many women they could get pregnant, and they actually got rewarded for it. It didn't matter that the men and women could be separated from each other and from their children, so for many years the idea of staying and taking care of the children and family just didn't exist. Now, there is no excuse for this type of behavior, but it's hard to change patterns passed down from generation to generation. I still talk to older black men who laugh at me when I talk about using birth control, when they should be the ones encouraging me to be responsible.User Detail :
Name : Sherman, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 34, City : Richmond, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : contractor, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Middle class,It's not just black women who have this problem. White women do it, too, as do all ethnic groups, I would imagine. So many women think they won't get pregnant - the whole 'It can't happen to me' syndrome. Ever watch Maury Povich? Half the women (girls) on there trying to determine who the baby's daddy is are white.User Detail :
Name : Pam19863, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 28, City : Springfield, State : MO Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,This, without question, is the No. 1 problem confronting African Americans today. Abysmal family structure is the common root of most, if not all, the mryiad problems facing African Americans today. Without fail, any group (not just African Americans; take poor, white, rural Southerners, for instance) that lets basic family responsiblity fall through the cracks is doomed to fail. Never mind that the remedy is so crystal clear. That said, there also seems to be a dearth of good black role models out there. There's not one I can think of in entertainment or sports - which are unfortunately the most influential of the professions nowadays - who is proactive about reversing this crippling pattern of behavior. Certainly there are plenty who lead model lives, better than most, but for some reason they're not invited on MTV's TRL to 'share.' They're just not cool, I guess. Responsibility is pretty boring.More important, this is a self-perpetuating situation. It's hard to break the cycle when your main life-influences (read: your parents), don't, or can't, instruct you properly on how to live in a modern, free society. It just seems like the African-American community, or at least those who most visibly represent it, have declared maturity and responsibility to be out of style - and no one, except you, seems to care.
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Name : Ed25566, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 30, City : n/a, State : NY Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,To this white person, this seems true of black and Mexican women. I'd be happy to find out that this idea is incorrect.User Detail :
Name : Brian, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 29, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower class,It is not the case that blacks across class lines are more irresponsible than other groups of the same socioeconomic standing, if one defines sexual irresponsibility as engaging in unprotected sex. The problem of unplanned births mostly affects poorer blacks, whites, Asians and Latinas. People of all colors with more money are more likely to use birth control or have abortions in order to prevent 'the baby daddy' situation.What is viewed as irresponsible may actually just be visibility. Because of religious beliefs or lack of social stigma, many black women choose to carry a child to term rather than abort. This is viewed as more responsible than killing a fetus. Poorer women are more likely to not have adequate education or availability to obtain birth control than affluent women, so they continue to have children. Abortions aren't free, and neither is birth control. If you are impoverished, unprotected sex is about the only thing you can definitely get without money.
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Name : C. Phillips, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : lupus, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 25, City : New Orleans, State : LA Country : United States, Occupation : university student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,It is absurd to direct this comment only to African-American women. This is a socioeconomic behavioral issue. Poor women have kids to get a man to provide for them. Most of these women have little education and have grown up poor and live by example. Blacks may have higher numbers because more blacks living in poverty.User Detail :
Name : Steve-G27825, Gender : M, City : Lawrence, State : KS Country : United States,You make some good points, but I find one major point that you are in error on. Birth control can be free. Have you ever heard of abstinance, Planned Parenthood, Free condom programs, etc.... In this era of AIDS awareness, there are so many cities that have programs that give away free condoms. Planned parenthood also gives out free condoms and low to free birth control depending on your income. There are options out there, you just have to care enough about yourself to try to find them.....User Detail :
Name : Ronnie, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Presbyterian, Age : 33, City : University Place, State : WA Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower class,This is a socio-economic issue. When the Welfare State was first created it had substantial incentives for poor couple to not establish paternity, an unwed mother was seen as more deserving of assistance than a poor two parent home with established paternity. Just re-read either 'My Fair Lady' or 'Pigmanlian' to see how this victorian sensibility of deserving poor is developed. An umwed mother was taken advantage of by a scondrel and deserving of our pity, a poor family was not. This concept of desrving has been maintained by our government assistance programs. Until recently an unwed mother received more assistance than a two parent home. This left the father with two option, remain with his family, establish paternity and watch his child starve, or abandon them and see his childern only fail to flurish. Now add this stress to a class/race who has already seen the family unit concept weaked by slavery, which has a cultural tradition of matriarchy, add recent feminist thought, and look at the results. The last thing that we need to add to this formula is the fact that behaviors migrate across races in similar social-economic conditions and then migrate up the class structure. If poor black folks are doing it now, poor white folks will be doing it tomorrow. Illegitamacy was primarily a problem amoung poor blacks in the late fifties and sixties, it migrated to poor whites during the seventies, and in the eighties it migrated up the class ladder into the middle class whites and blacks. This social entropy effect has been documented in the athropoligical journals for years.User Detail :
Name : R.W.J., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Presbyterian, Age : 38, City : Sunbury, State : OH Country : Argentina, Occupation : Consultant, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,So why do more black men seem to abandone their children? Many Mexicans seem to work four jobs if they have to.User Detail :
Name : Brian, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 29, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower class,your reply is typical of the problem.being poor is no excuse.blacks have every chance to get free birth control.welfare created this problem.thats why on the birth certificates where it says father/unknown you get a check.your repley says it all.its not my fault because im black and and poor.User Detail :
Name : billy, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Baptist, Age : 48, City : lugoff, State : SC Country : United States, Occupation : technical, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Lower middle class,Why did enron go bankrupt, why can't we drink from that fountain, why is ther affirmative action, why are there charitable foundations set up by the wealthy only to be used as tax shelters, why the movie 'Hannibal'? stop looking at us go home take a bath and think about how to improve our condition, you will then start to notice things about other races. think before you write.User Detail :
Name : J21098, City : L>A, State : CA Country : United States,
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