I'm an African-American female who attends Stevenson High School in Livonia, Mich. I have noticed that stereotypes are very strong here. I am diverse and listen to everything from N'Sync to Eve, Godsmack to LeeAnn Rimes and Mariah Carey. I wear Abercrombie and American Eagle, date all races, my name is 'Jodie' and I talk properly. Often kids respond to me by saying 'that's weird' when I don't fit their stereotype of black people. Why are they so unworldly and don't know the difference between something factual and stereotypical when it comes to race? I feel like a foreigner in my own neighborhood. People should grow up and accept others as they come, not as a whole.
User Detail :
Name : Jodie, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 17, City : Livonia, State : MI Country : United States, Occupation : Student and retail, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Upper class, Hi Jodie. I think U R totally right. I am a bisexual white male and my boyfriend is black. He attends Florida State University and is very intelligent. He carries himself very well and speaks more proper then I do. He works for Sprint PCS as a CSR and very often gets told racisal remarks about blacks that the customer has had contact with. Remarks on black being slow, dumb and uneducated. Ofcourse the person on the other line does not even take the time 2 realize he himself is black. He 2 feels out of place. Take care and this will get better.... ONE
User Detail :
Name : Mike McBride, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 23, City : Orlando, State : FL Country : United States, Occupation : CSR for BANK1, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, Jodie you are doing the right thing the right way. The best way to fight a stereotype is to mess with people's perceptions so they have to examine them. I liken this proces to using a t.v. in the pre-cable days. When you wanted to change the channel or adjust the picture or sound you had to go over to the t.v. and make the t.v. the way you wanted it. You are doing the same thing. By not fitting into the preconceptions of friends and family you are forcing them to try to remake you and in that way you are engaging them in changing their own lives. We must remember that the basis of stereotypes is laziness. If you hold a stereotype then you can class an entire group of people into your already developed ideas. In this way you don't have to take the time or make the effort to get to know the individual. Why should you deal with the person when you you already know what that person is like because of the stereotype that you hold about the group. Continue to mess with preconceptions even if you don't mean to do it. In the long run you will be a better person, and if you get one person to examine and change their way of looking at people then you have accomplished something.
User Detail :
Name : Michael Towslee, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : abstinent, Race : Human, Religion : unaffiliated, Age : 42, City : Tulsa, State : OK Country : United States, Occupation : Management, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Lower middle class, Jodi, First let me congratulate you in showing the diversity that so many groups preach but do not practice. Also, I feel that when you say you speak properly you will automatically receive more respect and considerations than those of any group who cannot speak without using slang, curse words etc. To address your questions about why people are surprised when they encounter this, I must assume that it is because many people of your race are often referred to as Oreos or Uncle Toms when they express opinions different and act different from the most visible black activists who are considered to be black leaders. I have done a lot of reading of material by some black authors who happen to be conservative socially and politically. The message I get is if they don't act and speak 'black' then their message is derided as a sell-out to 'whitey'. I think this is why the Ebonics movement several years ago gained such popularity with black educators. It was a means to show the white race that proper English was something that blacks didn't need to speak. It seems that anytime you go for interviews with employers, educators etc. that the better you speak the better you will be received. Personally, Jodi, I think you're on the right track and urge you to continue to live the diversity that is so often not practiced by the very people who preach it the loudest. Congratulations.
User Detail :
Name : Kathy26680, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 49, City : Springfield, State : IL Country : United States, Occupation : Medical, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, I think you are receiving the backlash of what all of us see on popular TV. MTV for example - how many African-American artists that play more 'mainstream' rock get airtime vs. the hip-hop/rap groups? Unfortunately, the model or stereotype is partially formed by what is seen on popular TV. So, you are a real live person that has her own diverse tastes that don't conform to the MTV norm - that stands out. I agree that it shouldn't, but... I live in Dallas, which has quite a bit of racial tension along the lines of your question. I wonder if other African-American students see you as different also, or is it more the white students? Just curious.
User Detail :
Name : Mark Bentley, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Gay, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : UFMCC - Cathedral of Hope, Age : 39, City : Dallas, State : TX Country : United States, Occupation : Financial analyst, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, It is unfortunate that you are on the receiving end of such misinformation about black people. Those who are not in constant contact with African Americans have only the television to inform them about black people, and the depiction is usually that of ghetto, uneducated people. Similarly, black kids not in contact with white people see only spoilt, rich white kids on tv (ie Beverly Hills 90210 etc) and believe that that encapsulates white people. There is really nothing you can do about this situation, just don't change.
User Detail :
Name : Jay31360, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, There are many reasons. Part of it, I think, is human nature. Generally, people like their lives to be predictable. They want the world to live up (or down) to their preconceptions and expectations. And when it doesn't, they blame you for being 'weird,' not themselves for being narrow-minded. It's tough to broaden some people's horizons, especially if their preconceptions bring them attention, power or popularity. ... Another reason is ignorance. Some folks think skin color has something to do with intelligence, rhythm, sexual performance, athleticism, etc. (I'm sure you've heard the stereotypes.) If that were the case, tanning beds would be able to change all those things. But some people find their stereotypes comfortable, and they don't want their thoughts challenged, so they stick to their ways of thinking. ... When I was in high school, I had a mix of friends, and I listened to all kinds of music. I just had to pick friends who were open-minded, which can be really hard sometimes.
User Detail :
Name : Elliott-Deen, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 37, City : Dallas, State : TX Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, Why are people like that? Pure ignorance. Rise above it.
User Detail :
Name : Rick29869, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, City : Springfield, State : OH Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, You're right, it would be great if people would accept each other as individuals, no matter what. But guess what? It'll never happen in our lifetimes. The best thing you can do is accept yourself for the unique and multi-dimensional person you are and pay no attention to the boneheads who criticize you or question your choices. By the way, I like James Brown, John Williams and Willie Nelson, I'm learning Esperanto, and I just got through brewing myself a nice pot of chai.
User Detail :
Name : E.D., Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 45, City : Kansas City, State : MO Country : United States, You answered your own question. You don't fit the stereotype. You obviously are a bright, intelligent person who does her own thinking, while most of your friends and classmates are still immature enough to let TV and others do their thinking for them. You like the music you like regardless of the gender or race of the musician. This shows a level of intelligence and maturity some people never reach. Quit worrying about the others and just continue to be you. I know this is hard to do in high school and you will find that this attitude is also common outside of school in the 'adult' world. The best you can do is to keep on being yourself. You sound like a great person. Don't let the idiots change you.
User Detail :
Name : Deb, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 49, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, Are you one of the few black teens going to this high school, because Livonia barely has a 1 percent black population. Anyway, the bottom line is that stereotypes of how people should behave and act because of your skin color and culture are so ingrained in this society that it's difficult for people to figure out someone who dosen't fit the image of what they are told this person is supposed to be, do or act like. When I was a teenager (I'm pushing 30 now) I always felt strange because I liked rock 'n roll just as much as I did R n'B and rap, plus I also liked what is now called alternative music - like the Cure, Siouxsie & the Banshees and all that, and because I didn't know any other black people who would admit to even liking that kind of music. As I've grown older, I just said, 'Screw it, I like what I like and that's all there is to it.' I've had people tell me I talk 'white' too, as if there's only one way to talk if you're black. The consensus has been that if you don't sound black enough, or like everything else black folks are supposed to like, or act black enough, then you're an Oreo or you just want to be white. The bottom line: as long as you can accept yourself for what you are, and you're happy with yourself, that's what is more important in the end. People will always try to stick you in a box for some reason or other. That's part of life. But you don't have to define who you are by what someone else thinks you should be. You actually challenge people's stereotypes by not fitting into them anyway, and that definitely disturbs some folks, which is a good thing.
User Detail :
Name : GH21742, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, City : Detroit, State : MI Country : United States, Occupation : Guard, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, I completly understand where you're coming from. I'm a young black woman who lived in the suburbs all my life. There weren't very many black people in my neighborhood or at the schools I attended, and as a result, most of my friends were white. I would try to make friends with the few black kids who went to my school, but they didn't like me because I didn't 'act black enough' for them. I don't speak ebonics and really don't like rap music. All my white friends listened to rock and so did I, and I still do. I know it gets really irritating having to put up with people's ignorant comments regarding your taste in music and the fact that you are educated and that it shows when you speak. Just keep being you. Wear the clothes you want to wear, listen to whatever music you like and don't worry about what anyone else has to say about it. There's nothing wrong with you.
User Detail :
Name : Renee30151, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 23, City : Eastpointe, State : MI Country : United States, Occupation : clerical, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Middle class, Don't sweat it. The problem is that most kids in high school don't tend to think with their own minds, but with the thoughts that have been supplied to them, either by their families, friends or television/movies. When something they see doesn't quite fit the mold that they expect it to, they're surprised. I think your diversity is a great thing. When I was going to high school in Tampa, the kids thought I was strange for listening to A Tribe Called Quest, then switching CDs to listen to The Beatles or John Coltrane. Now I talk to my old friends and see that they're beginning to discover the wide range of tastes that I enjoyed at a much younger age. I think the generation coming up now (people from 10-16) will be the ones who will really find themselves part of a melting pot. Until now, the supposed 'melting pot' that is America has really been more of a tossed salad. Sure, there's a number of different things thrown in, but they don't quite blend. There are more young people like yourself who I know of than there were when I was younger. Keep doing what you're doing, and don't change yourself to alter someone's reaction to you. Keep 'em on their toes!
User Detail :
Name : Sam F., Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 22, City : Orlando, State : FL Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, I admire your courage and individuality. A few years ago, I taught a journalism workshop for minority high school students. I knew young African-American students who spoke grammatical English, worked hard and had every reason to expect to be successful one day. And yet the things they were telling me were appalling. They told me that other black kids accused them of 'acting white,' as if working hard and being responsible were a white thing, and the opposite was black. You just keep being yourself. The whole world will hear from you one day.
User Detail :
Name : Ken, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 47, City : Milwaukee, State : WI Country : United States, Occupation : writer, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, I becames very close friends with a black woman in a small office I worked in. She is smart, responsible, funny, warm and an independent thinker. The other black women gave her a difficult time saying that she talked like me and acted 'white'. She was just true to herself, which was to do her job well, make friends with people she liked and respected and live her life on her own terms. I think they were just irritated that she didn't side with them when she felt they were wrong or were opposed to something she felt strongly about. People need to be true to themselves and make choices based on what is right for them, not what is 'expected'.
User Detail :
Name : Tess-H, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : New Age/Metaphysical, Age : 48, City : Utica, State : NY Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences .
