Dare To Ask Talk And News About Our Differences - This topic has 42 replies, 43 voices, and was last updated 16 years, 6 months ago by
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- I used to very generous to the homeless and handicapped people panhandling on the streets, until one night coming out of a theater I gave some guy $20. My companion and I went to get our vehicle and drove to a very posh restauant just down the way - and surprise of surprises, who should we see but the same guy we had just given money to. There is no way he could have walked to this restaurant in the short time it took us to drive there, and even if it were possible, if he truly were living on the street there would be no way he could have afforded to dine there (a typical dinner for two costs close to $100).
After having been ripped off by this man, I am unable to give money to anyone on the street since. I know he most likely is the exception rather than the rule, but it has just left a bad taste in my mouth.
User Detail :
Name : Freeda R., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 29, City : Toronto, Ontario, State : NA Country : Canada, Occupation : I choose not to work, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,In Grand Rapids we see many 'regulars.' Some are con artists who act poor and have a slick story. One black guy has asked me over nine times in 10 years for money so he can visit his sick sister - he always claims he's a stranger in town. I just remind him that I've heard it before. There are mentally unbalanced people. An elderly Asian man tells people he's Jackie O. For some, being homeless is easier. My boss helped a guy - got him an apartment, bought some clothes - then found out he had more than $20,000 a year in pension money coming. Six months later we saw him on the street. But the majority are truly in need and want out of their circumstances. The truth is, the homeless people you see are a fraction of the total amount. What do I do? Donate money to shelters and charitable groups.User Detail :
Name : Geo, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 34, City : Grand Rapids, State : MI Country : United States, Occupation : Professor, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,That is a very terrible thing to say. Please, don't be so quick to judge anyone. You may just be in that person's shoes, oneday. No one, I mean, no one, wants to be hungry or cold. Everyone wants to be able to provide for themselves or their families. There are some free-loading people out there. But, most of the free loaders have somewhere to stay because they live off of other people's kindness. No one wants to feel dirty or less than anyone else. Remember this, please start helping others. If they are not right, then, they will pay dearly one day. But you do the right thing, that's where you get your blessings. We never know when our turn might comeUser Detail :
Name : MarronBella22149, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 24, City : Anniston, State : AL Country : United States, Occupation : Customer Service, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower class,Where I live, a lot of the bums I see are druggies and alcoholics. They ask for money 24/7. They don't give a damn about the individual who tries to help them. To me, God will look down at you and smile because out of the kindness of your heart you gave a dollar that neither made u, or broke u, to someone who will probably add on to it and go buy liquor but if that is what makes them happy why not? I've gotten to the point to where I'll ask 'What do you want my dollar for?' They say the usual 'i'm hungry ms' or 'im trying to buy something to drink' and I'll say 'okay, tell u what, how about u come in this place with me and I'll buy you what u want.' They usually back down because they don't really want food and drink. They want liquor and drugs. Now I can't speak for them all because there are some honest homeless people out there who actually lost their home and family and have no other resort, but you very seldomly find those, especially in my neighborhood. I say you aren't stingy, you just question the unknown, you don't wanna give your money to someone who u think doesn't deserve it but think about it, there's probably someone who feels the same way about u...User Detail :
Name : Noneofyabusiness, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Age : 19, City : St. Louis, State : MO Country : United States, Occupation : full time college student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,i know from my own volunteer work that about half of the homeless you see on the street are mentally imbalanced, and about the same amount have been released from prison or prison hospitals with noplace to go. very often it's a combination of the 2. homeless women are a lot more rare, mostly because being a woman on the streets is so dangerous. women are likely to seek shelters and enroll in programs. completely seprate are homeless kids. often they're runaways, or their parents were homeless and left them or died, or the kid's drug addiction, mental disease or violence got in the way. homelessness happens to other people- when the sole breadwinner of a family can't or won't earn and they can't pay the rent, when they're kicked off disability and don't know where to turn, etc. but in answer to your ethics question, no i don't give money to random homeless out begging on the streets. those are just the opportunists. the real needy are out raiding dumpsters, or gathering cans for recycling, or trying to get by somehow, not just sitting around panhandling. give to trustworthy, organized charities instead of throwing your money away.User Detail :
Name : jen30977, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 19, City : NY, State : NY Country : United States, Occupation : emt, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class,So you think all poor people choose to be poor and all homeless people choose to be homeless? Perhaps this is because of your military background, where a similar all-encompassing observation can be made that all people in this society have a chance to make their own mark and live free, rather than choosing a profession where someone tells you what to do and what to think. Personally, I feel more sorry for you than many homeless and poor. At least many homeless and poor use their brains and hearts to decide for THEMSELVES what is right and what is wrong. (and left, left, left, right, left) Incidentally, deciding what is right and what is wrong must rank in the top ten reasons of WHY people are poor and homeless (you know the slick rich men with gold pinky rings aren't too terribly concerned about right and wrong, yet you think they are more deserving of your respect than the poor and homeless). Must be nice to have everything paid for and be secure in the warm fuzzy knowledge that you are in the right. Do you think we should call in the national guard to 'sanitize' our streets of these people who 'choose' to dirty them? Oh, but you'll probably be too busy war-mongering against other countries to turn your attentions to Americans in the next few months. Still, us poor better watch out after the next 'enemy' is defeated.User Detail :
Name : amber31538, Age : 30, City : barrow, State : AK Country : United States,You shouldn't feel bad about not giving money. I'm a student at UNC, and there is a huge panhandler presence on Franklin Street in downtown Chapel Hill. There was a recent study that found the average 'homeless' person is making about $21,000 a year. I constantly see them eating $10-15 entree range restaurants after the bars close. Real homeless people have access to tons of organizations willing to help them out, and, if you want to give charity, you're much better off giving it to accredited organizations than to the people that are so busy making money on the street that they can't look for work.User Detail :
Name : Jeff31169, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Southern Baptist, Age : 18, City : Surf City, State : NC Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,i work as a waitress...every now and then, an old man comes in with nothing but a cart that he carries everywhere with him.he odviously had nowhere to go because he would sit in the restaurant for hours and sometimes fall asleep. one day the other servers and i got together some money and i walked it over to him. he graciously said thank you and as i was walking away...i saw him pull out an envelope, open it and and add what we gave him to a handful of money...including 20's !!! A few months later i saw him getting out of his car and walking over to a bench.and i see him in restaurants all over the place 'sleeping' Some of these people are pretty skilled Imagine...living on the streets for 10 yrs...working over the people...you'd be set !!!User Detail :
Name : Melissa, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Nazarene, Age : 20, City : Jacksonville, State : FL Country : United States, Occupation : waitress, Education level : High School Diploma,Ever hear the saying, 'Them that gots, gets and them that don't, don't'? Well it's true. Most people that come from poor families stay poor. It's easy to say that everyone can go to college and get a job: especially if your parents can afford to send you to college. I rarely hear this argument from people raised in lower middle class or poor families. We know what it's like to be broke and struggling constantly. Ultimately, it comes down to the cause of so many Racial/Ethnic/Sex/Gender/Religious misconceptions: ignorance. I don't use 'ignorance' with the negative conotation that most people use it today. Ignorance simply implies that there is a lack of knowledge on a given subject or set of circumstances. It's hard to feel empathy for some one who's situation one can hardly comprehend. So, if you want a real answer to your question, got talk to some homeless people.User Detail :
Name : Josh, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 25, City : Arcata, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Cook, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower class,I agree, I don't believe that people 'choose' to be homeless. Many homeless people are mentally ill or have additions that make it hard/impossible to hold down a job. Where I live beggers are a common sight. Often they are dressed better than I am. Perhaps this is why I believe in giving handouts to homeless people. I DO believe in giving money to charities that help the homeless as it is a better use for your money.User Detail :
Name : Jodie, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Buddhist, City : Rather not say, State : NA Country : Canada, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class,'The only freedom in life is the freedom of choice, but once you make that choice you are a slave to that decision.' This is the case with all of us. We choose to suceed or to fail. The issue of poverty vs. wealth is the very core of the 'american dream'. Having lived oversees, American is the place where poverty is a choice. That's not the case everywhere, but here it certainly is. We all have circumstances that set us back, what sets us apart is how we choose to deal with the circumstance. I came out of high school with no one's help. I began working minimum wage construction jobs. Now 7 years later I have a net worth in $300K's and live a comfortable middle class life with no debt. I do not have a college degree, although I do have college classes. College is accessable to all in this country. At $18 a credit hour plus financing and payments available, there is no reason one can't go to a community college. There are few, few exceptiong to the homeless scenario, and for those exceptions there are so many private and gov't organizations available to them there is not excuse for them being where they are. I have seen homeless able bodied people asking for money on street corners where each corner of the intersection has a 'Now Hiring' sign on it. So many times I've heard people say 'I can't work for minimum wage.' That's the problem. It's a choice. I made a choice to surround myself with sucessfull people. People I wanted emulate, and now I am well on my way. I have friends who surrounded themselves with people who were not want they want to become. Now I am there and they are still 'poor'. Both they and I are slaves, or results, of our choices.User Detail :
Name : PAH, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Religion : Christian, Age : 25, City : Ft. Worth, State : TX Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,I have done a lot of community service working with the homeless and you are absolutely right in not giving them money. More than 50 percent of panhandlers are not homeless, and the great majority will use the money to get drunk or high. However, they are not homeless 'by choice.' If you are feeling stingy, consider donating to a homeless shelter, where you know your money will actually help the homeless. Giving money directly to the people will often do more harm than good.User Detail :
Name : Becky23310, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 13, City : Newton, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : Less than High School Diploma,I think the class you're born into largely decides the class you'll live in. I'll assume your parents are middle class since you don't seem to understand poverty. Here's a simple question... why aren't you rich yet? There's 'so much opportunity out there for someone to make something for themselves', why do you choose to be middle class instead of upper class?User Detail :
Name : Akintola28986, Gender : M, Race : Black/African American, Age : 24, City : Silver Spring, State : MD Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College,If you're concerned about what a homeless person will do with the money that you give them, but want to help them, give the money to a charity that provides food and shelter to the homeless. That way, you know that the needs of the poor will be met, and the money won't be spent of a bottle of alcohol. The Salvation Army do a lot of good work with the homeless.User Detail :
Name : Dangerous-Dave, Gender : M, Religion : Christian, Age : 21, City : Dundee, State : NA Country : United Kingdom,Tiffany's question really has two major parts: whether giving money to a homeless person/ panhandler is a good idea, and whether these people are poor by choice. I think previous postings have given very good reasons why people can find themselves homeless through no fault of their own. I'm taking a psychology class, and I was actually just reading about this very issue. Another reason why some people believe that victims are responsible for their own misfortune is that this view makes it easier to believe that you could never be victimized in the same way. Therefore, by putting yourself in someone else's shoes, you may feel more inclined to blame their misfortune on bad circumstances (lost jobs) rather than their own tendencies (laziness, etc.). The question of giving money to the homeless, however, is more complicated. I know that I have seen people near my school asking for money day after day, which made me feel that my money was wasted on them because it wouldn't help them progress. If you feel uncomfortable donating money, I would suggest that you look up the locations of some nearby homeless shelters so that you can at least direct the people to some source of help that they may not know about. Also, a good suggestion I saw in a response to a previous posting is to give money to homeless shelters themselves. This will ensure that you give money only to the homeless who use state services, which may reassure you that they are actually trying to help themselves as well.User Detail :
Name : Alex, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 17, City : Evanston, State : IL Country : United States, Occupation : College student, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Upper middle class,
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