[Josh]

I suppress all of my emotions to a great degree. I haven't cried in the last 5 years, don't express my anger, and rarely express any emotion in a significant way. I probably do this so I cannot be hurt or cannot hurt others. Is this common?

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Name : Josh, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 25, City : Arcata, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Cook, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower class, 

[Annie23887]

I believe that suppressing emotions is very common. The question is: Is this a good thing? No. If you suppress your emotions, the pain, anger, fear or whatever will be internalized and expressed in a different way. I will stifle reactions sometimes so I won't offend or rock the boat. Consequently I will get a sore neck, back pain, heartburn, gastric distress or even a full-blown stress attack. I was under a great deal of stress recently, and instead of dealing with it, I just pretended everything was fine. That night my heart raced and pounded for 30 minutes. I made my husband get up and check my blood pressure. (He has a blood pressure monitor.)

Sometimes, there could be another reason people are not expressing emotions. Are you under medication? I know that some antidepressants could have this kind of effect. Why don't you discuss this with your physician or someone you respect and trust?

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Name : Annie23887, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 52, City : Atlanta, State : GA Country : United States, Occupation : Copy Editor, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Jessica]

Some researchers believe that supressing emotions is the reason that men do not live as long as women.

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Name : Jessica, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, City : Norfolk, State : VA Country : United States, Occupation : adjunt university professor, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower class, 

[Sandy]

I have not had a real cry since my dad died in 1977. When thinking about it some days later, I began to cry again and my mom told me, 'Don't start that again'. I did not realize this was the last time until people close to me started dying as I became older and I was always the strong one, getting everyone through it. I want to cry and don't how...

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Name : Sandy, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 41, City : New Orleans, State : LA Country : United States, Occupation : Administrative, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Athena]

Hello, Josh. No, I don't think this is common in the general population, but it is a very common phenomenon among people with autistic spectrum disorders, including autism, both low- and high-functioning, and Asperger Syndrome, which I have. When I was born in 1951, the estimated 10,000 in the general population. Since 1990, the incidence has skyrocketed to one in 300, with one in 150 in Silicon Valley. No one has an explanation of why this is happening. Suppressing emotions is usually thought of by the psychiatric community as being unhealthy, but the same may not be true for spectrum individuals, as it may be a 'self-protective' behavior for them instead.

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Name : Athena, Gender : F, Disability : Asperger Syndrome/autistic spectrum, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Buddhist, Age : 53, City : Houston, State : TX Country : United States, Occupation : computer analyst, Education level : 2 Years of College, 

[Jennifer]

Josh, I am learning about how not to suppress emotions by first to know that emotions serve a purpose...they help us to move towards something....E---motion...I see it as energy in motion. I am studying NVC, check out the website at CNVC.org for lots of explanation and support in your area...I joined a practice group that helps me identify my feelings and then to see the underlying need that is either being met or not being met that causing this emotion to come up or become 'ALIVE' in me. It's been a wonderfully liberating experience....My request is that you give yourself permission to learn and grow at whatever pace you feel safe doing so....and get the support you need.

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Name : Jennifer, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 38, City : Rochester, State : NY Country : United States, Occupation : Teacher, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 

[Joe]

I believe this is yet another thing becoming more common as the years progress, along with the problems described on other follow up posts, it can also cause psychological problems.. I did the same exact thing my late teen years. One of my nicknames back in high school was 'terminator' due to the complete absence of voice tone, facial expressions, etc. In response to doing this so you 'can't hurt others,' you may unknowingly do so. Not expressing yourself around someone who feels strongly for you, even if they know how you act around others, may cause them to mistakingly believe that you do not care for them. Also, for people you don't know, it's easy for them to mistake your lack of emotion as an arrogant 'I don't have time for you' vibe. With a combination of both people that do and don't know you, you'll have to answer the questions 'Are you alright? You look like you want to kill someone' multiple times a day. As far as 'hurting yourself' is concerned, sure there's nothing selfish about that, and it's always your own mind, body and life. The only warning I heed with this, is getting so far into a phase of absense of emotions: it can consume you. Lets just say the reason I decided it was time to come out of that stage in my life, was the day I found sex to be 'annoying' rather than pleasureable for the first time in my life.

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Name : Joe, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 23, City : Houston, State : TX Country : United States, Occupation : I.T., Education level : Technical School, Social class : Middle class, 

[Jeff Gimby]

Dear Josh Emotions defined means an excessive amount of feelings. I have been angry before and I have been excessivly angry. I have been scared and I have been excessivly scared. I hope you can see were I am going.I believe if you can reconize your feelings early before they become emotions then there is no emotions to surpress. I believe if you are truly happy and satisfied then it is ok

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[Earl]

Josh I have suppressed my emotions for 17 years, as a result of my fathers and grandfathers death in the same year. The best advice {no formal education} learn to express your emotions in some why. I bet if you really look you express emotions in ways you do not see. It is hard to describe what to look for. But you need to find some way to express yourself, an example is writing, sketching, painting etc.

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Name : Earl, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Gay, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 33, City : Bedford, State : TX Country : United States, Occupation : Telecommunications, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Mike]

Well, I do that most of the time, but most of the time you will end up blowing up in someones face. Maybe that someone is the cashier at the local gas station, or maybe the one who made you mad. Just find one way to release your hate, anger, or depression...

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Name : Mike, City : Pensacola, State : FL Country : United States, 

[ShirleyAvery]

Unfortunately, what you describe is all too common. I grew up in a home where problems were either denied or minimized. When I was young and expressed certain emotions, I was told either "It's not that bad" or "You shouldn't feel that way." It's called a dysfunctional family - one that doesn't honestly deal with reality and often leads to alcoholism, gambling, bulimia and other addictions. As an adult I learned that that kind of suppression is very unhealthy. Get counseling! It's taken me years of counseling to counteract and unlearn those unhealthy denials and bad coping devices. There are also free self-help groups: AA for alcoholics, OA for Overeaters, Al-Anon for people who are friends or family of alcoholics, GA for gamblers who want to quit. Good luck! Just Curiou

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[Dot]

I have a relative who is a total basket case all the time. Her relationships would be much better if she COULD learn to suppress some of her overt emotion. So I think there's a fine line between Vulcan and out of control that we all need to learn to walk. It's also cultural. Some cultures accept hysteria as enthusiasm (wailing at funerals, uvulating at weddings, etc.) while others find it frightening and consider it mental illness to behave this way.

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Name : Dot, Gender : Female, Age : none, City : L.A., State : CA Country : United States, Social class : Middle class, 

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