[Alex J.]

How can women justify spending thousands of dollars on fertility treatments to have their own babies, when thousands of unwanted children are in orphanages? I'd prefer a response from a family that has gone through or is considering fertility treatments, or professionals who deal with such issues.

User Detail :  

Name : Alex J., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Jewish, Age : 17, City : Elkins Park, State : PA Country : United States, Occupation : High School student, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[Bellario]

We are considering fertility treatments for the following reasons: 1. Foreign adoptions are expensive and require you to live a couple weeks or more in that country; we can't afford that. 2. We are afraid we will adopt a child and the parents will come back later and take it back. 3. We are not sure if we can handle a child with emotional problems or severe physical difficulties. 4. We love each other and would like the chance to have a baby together.

User Detail :  

Name : Bellario, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 31, City : Omaha, State : NE Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Anita]

First, it's misleading to say women choose this. In many cases, women and men make the decision together. Second, I think anybody who chooses to conceive their own child, whether or not they need fertility treatment, is creating a new life instead of taking care of one who has nobody to care for them. Anybody who wants children can adopt. I have not decided whether to have my own child or adopt, but I've been giving it serious thought, and I think there are valid reasons to choose either path. For some women, it's deeply meaningful to go through the experience of pregnancy and childbirth, and for some men it's meaningful to be a partner in this experience. For some women (not all by any means), it fulfills a potential that our body has, and it's a basic part of life as a woman that we want to experience. I see pregnant women and feel a longing to have a child. Some people want a child who looks like them. Some people don't know how difficult or how expensive fertility treatment is going to get when they start down that path, and some have a lot of pressure from their families to try. And some people are afraid an adopted child will have medical and/or emotional problems because they did not have a secure infancy or early childhood. That feels like a lot to take on. But all of that considered, I still may choose to adopt because there are children who need families. I think either decision will be valid.

User Detail :  

Name : Anita, Gender : F, Age : 40, City : Los Angeles, State : CA Country : United States, Social class : Middle class, 

[Eileen-Chilson]

I would like to know how to adopt as orphan from another country. It seems difficult.

User Detail :  

Name : Eileen-Chilson, City : Yucaipa, State : CA Country : United States, 

[Sarah28127]

I think you overestimate the number of children out there waiting to be adopted. In the United States, healthy white babies are very difficult to adopt. There are often substantial difficulties for a white couple to adopt a baby of another race (some parts of the country simply will not allow it). Foreign adoptions are quite difficult and expensive, and there are no guarantees when working with a foreign adoption agency.

User Detail :  

Name : Sarah28127, Gender : F, City : Denver, State : CO Country : United States, 

[Lani]

Unfortunately, there are no guarantees even when you're giving birth to a baby. China is probably the best place to adopt from, especially if you're looking for a girl. They only require one trip to China, (many require two), and most of the time, there is really nothing at all wrong with the child other than the fact that they were girls. It's true that white babies are very difficult to find in the US, but there is no overestimating the amount of children that need to be adopted. Just go online and look for children waiting for homes. You will be amazed by the sheer number of children.

User Detail :  

Name : Lani, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, City : Santa Cruz, State : CA Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

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