From a former racist…

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  • #3935

    Kathy
    Member
    I am a former racist who is here to learn. I wasn't raised to be a racist, but I was the victim of a violent hate crime. Later in life I became bitter. All I ever heard or saw in media was whitebashing and stereotyping whites as the only people who could hate. I was very aware of every racial slur used against me, and this was frequent. There was nowhere for me to go to talk about this. All of the anti-hate groups reinforced the idea that only whites could be racists, but I knew better. When I would try to discuss double standards, people would invalidate my experiences with racism as a white woman. Everyone's culture was celebrated but mine. Racial slurs are OK when whites are the victims. This eventually turned me into a racist because no one else would listen. I pulled myself out of that mentality, but I still think race should be discussed not in the context of 'get whitey,' but in the context of 'racism cuts both ways.' What do others think?

    User Detail :  

    Name : Kathy, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 37, City : Fresno, State : CA Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Lower class, 
    #31493

    A.R.
    Participant
    I'm not excusing any form of hate or prejudice, but the old saying 'what goes around comes around' has a certain validity. Example: Abused children tend to become abusive parents. This seems to be a basic human reaction - not a good one, but one that we indulge in, as your experience points out.

    Let me throw into this that 'every action triggers a reaction' and a bit of history. As you are aware, up until the last few decades, the United States has been a white-ruled country, where the white population is the powerful elite. And this elite population indulged in what is also another bad trait of human nature: to exploit, abuse and humiliate people they consider their inferiors, ranging from slavery and torture to a condescending attitude. So my theory is that you are caught in the 'reaction' or backlash part of history (who was it who said 'The sins of the fathers are visited upon their children' ?) What is worrisome here is that this could devolve into a viscious cycle.

    As a Hispanic male I have experienced different sides of this dilemma, including prejudice by people who have themselves been discriminated against, and who you would think should know better. But as I said, it's human nature. All I can say is, seek the higher ground and treat each person as an individual. Some you'll like; others not.

    User Detail :  

    Name : A.R., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Religion : Atheist, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #26165

    Wayne24387
    Participant
    I am sorry that you were the victim of a hate crime. I don't feel anyone should go through that (oooooh, pollyanna!). But they do. And black Americans have been going through it (and still do) for centuries. So, unfortunately for you, you got a taste. Maybe some good will come of it, but honestly I don't see how. My best hope is apparently what has happened: you pulled yourself out of the destructive mental state the experience put you in.

    Racism does cut both ways. I know a lot of racist blacks. For instance, all of my immediate family. I don't consider myself racist. But it would be more accurate to say that when I have racist thoughts, I try to remind myself that the thoughts are unjustified and wrong. Everyone is an individual.

    But there are a lot more racist whites than blacks. The problem is that many of the racist whites help run the country. The 'get whitey' attitude comes from (partly) the perception that eliminating the white racists would eliminate all the race problems in America. Well, it's not true. The problem will still be here. Forever.

    I have some idea where racist attitudes of black Americans come from. I live it and feel it myself, though I do try to 'judge everyone as an individual.' But I am really curious about why racist whites feel the way they do. I mean the ones who have never really gotten to know more than one or two blacks. Is it 'religion?' Are they judging all of us based on a bad impression of one or two? Are they just acting as their parents taught them?

    User Detail :  

    Name : Wayne24387, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Baptist, Age : 43, City : Parsippany, State : NJ Country : United States, Occupation : marketing, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #33344

    Anwar
    Participant
    It was only 30 some-odd years ago that the N-word was tossed around with all sorts of hate and violence toward blacks. I mean, Strom Thurmond called black people the N word days before he died two years ago! I know you've heard this a million times, but white people will never experience that sort of systemized hate. That is not your fault, but the repercussions of the last 400 years are still being felt by everyone. We can wax poetic about how fixing double standards by doing this or that will make it better, but what it really will take is just time (like decades) and new generations of people with similar social training. I think one day we'll realize that letting below-average SAT scoring C students into Yale because of legacy admission rules (reference our president) is invalid. I think one day Black History Month will be redundant because there will be more diverse people writing the history books, and that one day everyone can feel like they can participate in Kwaanza like they participate in St. Patrick's Day and Oktoberfest.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Anwar, Gender : M, Race : Black/African American, Age : 25, City : Pittsburgh, State : PA Country : United States, Occupation : physician, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #45700

    Laurent
    Member
    First, congratulations for challenging your own opinions instead of acting by inertia. I have experienced discrimination within my own country: just because I was from the South and had a funny accent, I was put in the 'you can't play with us' group, among kids from Portuguese or northern African origins. Hanging around a lot of Arabs from Algeria, Morocco and Tunisia gave me the opportunity to hear some racist/discriminating opinions felt the Morrocans were not to be trusted and that Tunisians were 'pussies'). I found out years later that a lot of Vietnamese people have a 'passionate' relationship with the Chinese. A tune sung by kids even goes something like: 'The Chinese, their asses all look the same. The one who doesn't have his documentation should go back home'. It's sung by 6-year-old kids, I swear it!

    I see racism as a behavior based on wrong conclusions and generalizations we all practice to some extent. Just as you cannot regard black people as bad because you had bad experiences with some of them, they can't blame you for being a descendant of slave owners - just like you can't blame the Holocaust on Germans who were not born at that time.

    A last little fact: I heard an Egyptian customs officer saying that he checked the names of white people instead of the photograph on their passport because 'they all look the same'... It could be actually interesting to collect a list of prejudices from various cultures and nations, just to observe how absurd it gets.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Laurent, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Disability : slight auditive handicap, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : my own mix of various religions, Age : 34, City : Barcelona, State : na Country : Spain, Occupation : freelance illustrator, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #19599

    Harvey
    Member
    The answer is a big YES! As a black man who grew up in an era (and in the South) where racism was overt, the harmful effects cut both ways. In other words, racism comes in all colors. I warn you that you will get a lot of people writing to justify a racist point of view. Don't buy it. The truth will always overcome lies and hate. There are only two races in the world: good people and bad. Be ready for the incoming email on this! Be strong, stay honest and believe. Racism and hate are a cancer of the human spirit.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Harvey, Gender : M, Race : Black/African American, Age : 48, City : Los Angeles, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Sales, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #18644

    Lisa
    Member
    I pride myself on being a very open-minded, non-prejudiced person, but I have always felt that a sort of reverse-discrimination exists. Blacks have their celebratory holidays and special TV channels (BET), and Hispanics have Univision and the Latin Grammys, etc. However, the moment someone thought of having an all-white TV channel, all hell would break loose, as it would be racist and discriminatory. If blacks and Hispanics and all others have a right to celebrate their race, so do I. Don't get me wrong, I totally get that for so long minorities weren't able to celebrate anything, and I don't bash them for doing so now, but times have changed in the last 50 years, and the newer generations are much less prejudiced against others, and I expect in the next 50 years that most prejudices against other races will be pretty much gone. But I still don't understand why is it considered racist for a white to celebrate his or her race.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Lisa, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 25, City : Richmond, State : VA Country : United States, Occupation : Housewife, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Lower middle class, 
    #23768

    Juno
    Participant
    A friend used to tell me that white folks who made racial comments were bigots, while minorities who made racial comments were stand-up comedians.

    Seriously, though, here are a few points:

    1. It's a double standard, but a double-standard that carries some heavy history with it.

    2. While race plays a big role, it's mostly a matter of who the dominant (in terms of power) group is - in the case of the Western world, that happens to be white people (white males, specifically).

    3. People have a tendency to resent the dominant group, so they'll react unfavorably toward it when they can get away with it - you, being a white woman without a college background and of a lower income class, present an ideal target. A black person surrounded by rich white folks in an upper-class neighborhood probably would not have made the same comments as he/she would have around you.

    4. White culture is not celebrated because it a) only exists in the loosest of terms, and b) being the dominant culture, has no need to be celebrated. The answer gets a little more complicated if you're talking about a more specific 'white' culture (German, Slavic, Irish, etc.), but remains essentially unchanged.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Juno, Gender : M, Race : Asian, Religion : Orthodox Christian, Age : 21, City : Richmond, State : VA Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 
    #41190

    Me21883
    Participant
    I notice that you fail to mention details surrounding what you claim to have been a hate crime. If something did happen, are you sure it was because of your being white, and not a matter of dangerous and/or inappropriate circumstances? If this did happen to you, it would do you some good to be honest with yourself - as well as we readers. While bitterness and ill feelings do exist on the part of some of us, this has been due primarily to mitigating life experiences and historical-to-present treatment from whites as a group (not as individuals, who vary). White racism, on the other hand, has primarily been the result of upbringing and informal tradition that blacks are inferior; just look at the types of offensive and sick 'jokes' you guys tell at our expense!

    As for the 'It goes both ways' standpoint, I disagree. The differences are that you have never had to get up from your public transportation seat if a former black slave owner demanded you to, nor would you have to go through humiliating treatment from public businesses (not being allowed to try things on for fear that you are somehow dirtier due to your race, etc.), nor have black cops shoved plunger handles up white folks' rears, etc. Sure, you are probably angry at petty name-calling, and this one incident that you wish to call racial, but sorry, these things pale in comparison to the systematic, apartheid-like racism and hatred suffered by us.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Me21883, Race : Black/African American, City : Gotham, State : NA Country : United States, 
    #25731

    Wiggy
    Member
    Those who are perceived to be 'on top' are not normally given the option of criticising those who criticise them from below. This happens in every walk in life and at almost every level you can think of. It works with sports teams leading the league, countries who are dominant on the world stage, and of course between races. Because over the last 400 years the world has been dominated by European (and therefore White) society and cultural values, those who are not part of that sect are critical of it. This has been partially caused by the brutal treatment of the populations of people eminating from those different cultural backgrounds. It is very difficult for a man whose grandfather was tortured, enslaved and beaten by somebody who he considers to be no different to you or your grandfather, to treat you as an equal and to accept that you have a legitimate complaint to make. With time, this fades. In some countries, it's quicker than others for cultural reasons. In the USA it will take quite some considerable time. Possibly, not even within our lifetimes. However, what speeds the process of forgiveness up is people accepting that history is regrettable, educating, and not relevant to how we should behave towards each other today. So, don't feel threatened. Accept people are not going to listen to you from time to time, but don't get angry about it. Don't lower yourself to the level you've just risen from.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Wiggy, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 25, City : Manchester, State : NA Country : United Kingdom, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #38117

    Natalia
    Participant
    I have known 2 kinsmen killed in racial attacks, and I have read of those who died from being White before they could walk. I have been racist since I was 15. You know what the world is like. You know that White cultures are being eliminated, you know what it feels like to be attacked, you know what it is like to have your nations invaded to the point where extinction is inevitable (Not necessarily the USA, but you know what I mean), because you are a member of a White race. Others cannot understand. One should fight for the ProWhite cause, because the mainstream will never listen to you otherwise. There will be an excuse for racial killings, verbal attacks, wherever you go. Do not listen when people or organizations say they killed or attacked White people because of the nature of White people. They are blaming the problem on the victim, because they are stuck in their AntiWhite, bigoted views that society has given them. In order to awaken the others, you have to be strong. You might be willing to look at the other side, but not many nonawakened Whites and Non-Whites will be willing to face their own actions, and they will continue to blame the victim.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Natalia, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Pagan, Age : 21, City : Detroit, State : MI Country : United States, Occupation : Nursing Student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
    #14418

    Nathan20137
    Participant
    I think you're right. Every body else is allowed to have pride in their race but whites. Although, the 'white pride' people do base their pride on beating down everybody else, if there were a way for people to be proud that didn't depend on trying to lessen other people, I would be all for that. I think that a lot of blacks are 'racial bullies'. They can go on and on about race, and you dare not raise an opposing view point, lest the badge of 'ignorant racist' be tossed on your shoulders. I dislike scummy people period. Thay can be any color or orientation, if they treat me badly, then I don't like them.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Nathan20137, Gender : M, Race : Black/African American, Age : 40, City : Seattle, State : WA Country : United States, Occupation : Tech, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 
    #25735

    Georgia
    Member
    It has been my experience that black ppl are more bigoted than whites. Although, I have to say I've never met a white supremecist(sp?), and hope I never do. I used to be a firm believer in if I don't like someone it's because of them, not because they're black, female, ugly, or whatever. But, the more I deal with the younger black generation, I find they are turning me more and more anti-black. Maybe I'm anti-younger generation. :) You're right about whitey bashing. Black comedians can get away with 'white ppl do this and white ppl do that', but white ppl aren't allowed to say things like that. All hell would break loose. May I also say, I'm so sick of hearing African-American. Since the human race originated in Africa, we're all African-Americans. I've spoken with quite a few ppl from Africa, and they laugh when black Americans call themselves African-Americans.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Georgia, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : Human, Religion : Pagan, Age : 50, City : Springtown, State : TX Country : United States, Occupation : nurse, Education level : Technical School, Social class : Lower middle class, 
    #18234

    Jesse Chapman
    Participant
    I'm sure that anyone can agree that a miracle can exist: mir-a-cle (noun): An event that appears inexplicable by the laws of nature There are plenty of instances where miracles can occur. When someone's heart stops, but they pull through and make it out alive. When someone falls from a great height and lives when a team of professionals would have bet money on their death. More and more examples quickly come to mind. So, there are real miracles. Now, let's explain fake ones -- or ones that are no longer miracles. Back in the day, lightning was a miracle to some. That's why Greeks and Romans invented Gods to explain what science could not. The only reason why modern humans are so reluctant to believe miracles today is because science can explain so much more today. The things that seem to be miracles today are just like the lightning of the past. Soon, science will be able to explain these things...more amazing and unbelievable...and science will explain those things. Miracles are simply acts of nature CURRENTLY unexplainable...not to say that one day they will not be able to be explained.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Jesse Chapman, City : Palm Coast, State : FL Country : United States, 
    #19975

    Meg-W
    Participant
    Have you ever had to get up from a seat for a former slave owner? How can you use this against a white person when you personally haven't experienced it either. I'm a 45 year old black woman and a former slave owner (fyi- they are all dead!) hasn't booted me out of a public transport seat and probably hasn't you, either. Racism does cut both ways and by denying this white woman's run in with a hate crime you are adding to the racism by saying that it only counts when it happens to blacks but whites fears are not valid.

    User Detail :  

    Name : Meg-W, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 45, City : Memphis, State : TN Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 
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