- This topic has 9 replies, 10 voices, and was last updated 23 years, 3 months ago by Chris D..
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- November 10, 1999 at 12:00 am #23778
MarissaParticipantIn my case, I'm an African-American female who has made the observation to myself that I don't notice some of my friends according to their race. When people first started asking me what race my best friend was, I could never reply because I had never bothered to ask her, it had never been as issue to me. It turns out she's just white. When asked about my boyfriend I don't know whether to respond 'jewish' or 'white' because I don't define him as either of those. I just simply define him as someone like me, which may be weird considering the fact that I'm black. Same goes with my best friend, though I hang out mostly with other blacks and hispanics.
User Detail :Name : Marissa, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 21, City : Mesa, State : AZ Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, November 10, 1999 at 12:00 am #1022
Lucy-H22644ParticipantI have heard many Caucasians say things like they don't even notice that an African-American friend is black, or that a Mexican friend is Mexican. I would like to know why people make comments like this. I have some theories, but I would like to know the opinions of other people on this subject. I am very proud or my Mexican heritage, and I don't want people to ignore that, because it is an important part of who I am.
User Detail :Name : Lucy-H22644, Gender : F, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Age : 25, City : San Jose, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Engineer, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, November 12, 1999 at 12:00 am #35499
Stephanie-WParticipantThis subject is rather sensitive. The 'color-blindness' is probably some people's attempt to be polite or politically correct. Many people feel uncomfortable recognizing other people as African-American, Latino, Caucasian, East Indian, Asian, and so on; because they think it's labeling someone and fear they may be seen as racist. I think it goes back to that thing mom thought us when we were young: 'don't point at people who look/act/speak different, it's not polite.' When you combine that with the fact that there are so many racist names for different ethnic groups, it's no wonder people are afraid of recognizing other people's ethnicity. I live in a very ethnically diverse city and when I get together with my friends, we joke that we're as culturally diverse as a UN conference. :) Perhaps we're all guilty of not always recognizing each other's ethnicity because we simply see each other as friends. My advice would be that next time you think someone is no recognizing your heritage, talk about it. They may be afraid that if they recognize your Mexican heritage, you might be offended. (I know it doesn't make sense, but that's just how it is) So go ahead and tell them about your Mexican heritage and show your enthusiasm about it. If you talk about yourself in terms of being a proud Mexican, they're likely to follow. Sincerely, Stephanie
User Detail :Name : Stephanie-W, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 23, City : Vancouver, BC, State : NA Country : Canada, Occupation : Business Administration, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, November 16, 1999 at 12:00 am #16640
Jason B.ParticipantMany whites want desperately to not be racist. I try hard not to prejudge anyone. But in all truth I prejudge EVERYBODY. White, black,hispanic, fat, muscular, sexy..., everyone. But after I get to know somebody, I don't always have their race on my mind every time I see them. But I never forget it. Any more than if I have a friend with any physical difference. I don't think any one does, and I don't think there is anything wrong with that.
User Detail :Name : Jason B., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 27, City : Quad-Cities, State : IL Country : United States, Occupation : sales, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, November 16, 1999 at 12:00 am #29351
SnugglesParticipantwell Lucy, i belive that people like that don't so much ignore your heritage but they just see past it. i too am hispanic and i hang out with mainly anglos. they all know i am hispanic but they don't treat me like i am below them or anything. they let speak of my heritage and don't ridicule me for it. they see past the color of my skin and my past and see me for who i am at that moment in time. they know my past has made me the woman i am today but they don't so much see me as just a hispanic woman. they just see me as a woman.
User Detail :Name : Snuggles, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Religion : Catholic, Age : 19, City : San Antonio, State : TX Country : United States, Occupation : child care, Education level : High School Diploma, November 18, 1999 at 12:00 am #27689
K.J.MemberI think that this is a very positive thing. When I say that about my friends it means that I am able to look beyond their color and recognize them as human beings just like I am. What a better world this would be if racists took this to heart. But while I do say that, I do appreciate the different ethnicities and nationalities of my friend. Just because I say that I don't notice their ethnicity doesn't mean I've forgotten it.
User Detail :Name : K.J., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Catholic, Age : 17, City : Bronx, State : NY Country : United States, Occupation : High school student, Social class : Middle class, November 19, 1999 at 12:00 am #26458
annonymousParticipantLucy: Once a friend of mine made a comment like that to me. I laughed and told her I would hope she would notice that I'm Black. I'm proud of my culture and my individuality, which is in part shaped by my color, age, sex, education,etc. I told her that I don't ignore or deny that she's Italian, I simply don't let our obvious differences have a greater or lesser value on how I relate to her as a person. Example, if someone asked me to describe my friend Tracey, the first thing I'd tell you was that she's Italian or White. Can't understand why we're so afraid to use the terms Black and White. It's a distinguishing feature. And for me these descriptions are nuetral. If a friend of mine(let's say someone White) wanted to describe me to someone else White, I'd say tell them I'm Black. I wear locks, short, in my 30's,etc. Honestly, color and other distinguishing features is how I describe folks. I hope folks aren't offended. I'm being honest. Why should anyone be apprehensive about acknowledging diversity?
User Detail :Name : annonymous, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 34, City : Detroit, State : MI Country : United States, November 23, 1999 at 12:00 am #28702
Rose29482ParticipantI think this is some people's way of telling people of color that our color is not an issue to them and does not bother them. In other words, they are trying to say they are 'color-blind.' The problem is, of course, that ignoring each other's family heritages and different nationalities doesn't make racism go away.
User Detail :Name : Rose29482, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 19, City : Los Angeles, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : animator, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Upper class, December 6, 1999 at 12:00 am #38175
Terri24703ParticipantI have friends from different cultural backgrounds and I enjoy our differences, but I don't go around thinking, 'my black friend Robyn, my spanish friend Yann...' To me, they are just 'my friends'. I learn a lot about other culture and customs from them, but I didn't become friends to prove I'm not a rascist or anything. We have common interests and enjoy each other's company. I think of them 'like me' and sometimes I forget we are different-once, I was shopping with Robyn and a salesclerk ignored her. I didn't notice the slight and I felt bad because I didn't know how she felt. I felt like I was letting her down as a friend. I guess race isn't what I'm thinking of when I make friends.
User Detail :Name : Terri24703, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 33, City : Philadelpia, State : PA Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, December 18, 1999 at 12:00 am #46307
Chris D.MemberMany times the response of not noticing color is a way of saying I'm not making assumptions based on your skin color or heritage. I'm very proud of my Puerto Rican heritage, but most people would assume by looks (fair skin, medium brown hair, and green eyes) that I would be connected more with my European heritage. Or my martial arts instructor who considers the most significant part of his heritage to be Chinese even though he is Black. He spent much of his youth with a chinese family and treated like one of their children. So you can't assume heritage by skin color.
User Detail :Name : Chris D., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Religion : Atheist, Age : 32, City : Austin, State : TX Country : United States, Occupation : Production Management, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class,
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