[J.B.]

I've also noticed how impolite some whites are. Whenever I go through a crowded aisle at a supermarket, I note that most blacks will say 'excuse me', but most whites won't. There's been times when I've had a shopping cart full of items, and the person behind me is carrying an item or two, so I'll let that person get in front of me. The blacks will without hesitation say 'thank you' and the whites don't. Why is this?

User Detail :  

Name : J.B., Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, City : Jacksonville, State : FL Country : United States, Occupation : Paralegal, 

[Justin27070]

Sorry about the dryness of my tone there. It occurs to me that I could've explained why white Americans tend to be 'ruder' than most. In and since the '60s there's been a general backlash against Victorian sensibilities, e.g. saying, 'Good morning' when it isn't; saying 'Bless you' to a sneezer regardless of whether he's religious or not; never talking politics with recent acquaintances; 'minding your own buisiness'; and generally supporting a false veneer of banality for fear of upsetting the calm. It's behind that veneer that classism and racism always hid, and in the '50s and '60s, alchoholism, domestic abuse and other cracks in the American dream festered. So a lot of whites adopted a sort of anti-Victorian attitude - sort of like couterculture light.

User Detail :  

Name : Justin27070, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 26, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 

[Justin]

I'm white, and while it seems there's a lot of Miss Manners types here, I do notice the phenomenon you speak of. I'm not a stickler for 'excuse me,' particularly in crowded situations. How many times are you going to say "excuse me" to get from one end of the room to another when everyone is shoulder to shoulder? The same thing for crowded busses. I always figured there was a tacit understanding that when you enter a crowded situation that toes will be stepped on and shoulders will be brushed against, and none of it is intentional. I think, along with most whites, that 'excuse me' becomes an inconvenient formality in these situations. It doesn't, however, have anything to do with the steppee/brushee's race, although I know that many blacks take it this way (oversensitive?) and so I now say excuse me, but only when the stepee/brushee is black.

User Detail :  

Name : Justin, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Age : 26, City : Chicago, State : IL Country : United States, Occupation : file clerk, 

[J.B.]

To Justin of Chicago: To say 'excuse me' shows you're a mannerly person. It's not an inconvenient formality. It takes less than a second to utter, and the effect can often be calming. How would you like it if someone ran smack into you or stepped on your toes without any acknowledgement? You said you'll say 'excuse me' only when the stepee/brushee is black. Well fine, if that's what you want to do, but sarcasm doesn't make any situation better.

User Detail :  

Name : J.B., Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, City : Jacksonville, State : FL Country : United States, Occupation : Paralegal, 

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