[Emma]

I haven't had many relationships, and a male friend told me that to make myself more attractive to guys, I should talk more and wear a short skirt/tight trousers to school. This goes against the way I am naturally, because I'm shy, quiet and studious and not exactly drop-dead gorgeous. Would I be more desirable if I followed his advice, or if I were just myself?

User Detail :  

Name : Emma, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 15, City : Cheshire, State : NA Country : United Kingdom, Occupation : student, Education level : Less than High School Diploma, Social class : Lower middle class, 

[Marc22360]

First, if it's not how you naturally feel you should look, that's enough to say, 'Don't do it' in and of itself. Wearing shorter skirts may bring you more attention, but is it the kind of attention you want? Boys who start talking to you simply because you're showing some leg probably aren't going to be the best boyfriends. Be yourself and you're more likely to find someone who likes you for who you are, not what you look like. I see you're 15, so you have lots of time to seek out someone who really cares about Emma instead of Emma's legs and butt. The advice about talking more (which lets you meet more people) is much better than the skirt thing.

User Detail :  

Name : Marc22360, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 25, City : Morgantown, State : WV Country : United States, Occupation : Grad Student, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

[SR28473]

It might be interesting to experiment a little bit, but I want to urge you to not go overboard or become too caught up in trying to attract guys. It'll all come in good time, and in my opinion subtlety works a lot better than anything too overt. When I was 15 I started wearing a lot of tight clothes and plenty of makeup, and I did get a lot of attention ... just the wrong kind. It was flattering but dangerous, too. I was pretty naive and let guys lure me into some pretty sketchy situations. I'm very shy myself, but some of it has melted away with age. You've got plenty of time to date, and a guy isn't going to like the complete Emma just because you're wearing a short skirt. Dressing up can be fun, but I would leave it at that, not, 'I am going to wear this to attract guys.' That could backfire. Wear that stuff if it makes you feel good.

User Detail :  

Name : SR28473, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Humanist, Age : 23, City : San Antonio, State : TX Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, 

[Rhiannon]

I know it seems difficult when you're 15, but just be yourself and don't worry about what others think of you, especially boys. If high school in the United Kingdom is anything like high school in the United States, then the best advice I can give you for dating is to just wait. High school is filled with boys who are too young to not be shallow. They see the same ridiculous media ideals that the girls do, and they don't know any better yet. You don't need to show your legs. You just need to be in a better environment to meet males who appreciate you for who you are, and that will come later. So, hang in there, honey!

User Detail :  

Name : Rhiannon, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Jewish, Age : 29, City : Eden Prairie, State : MN Country : United States, Occupation : Professor, Social class : Middle class, 

[Liza22557]

Be yourself. Wearing short skirts may attract the wrong type of guy. Several girlfriends of mine dress more provocatively than I do (plunging necklines, tight little clothes), and although they do 'get the guys' when we're out on the town, they may only get them for a one night stand. They have often questioned me as to why they have not met 'Mr. Right,' and have found themselves in a cycle of unhappily dating (what I would consider to be) superficial, insincere womanizers. I do not dress in the same manner (modestly, but stylishly) and have been in a healthy relationship with a great guy for more than two years. I, like you, consider myself more shy and studious as well. So my advice to you would be to be yourself, and dress however you feel comfortable. (For the record, my boyfiend is turned off by women who appear 'easy' and prefers a woman who dresses elegantly, tastefully and confidently.) Bottom line: If you want to attract trash, dress trashy. If you want to attract class, dress classy.

User Detail :  

Name : Liza22557, Gender : F, City : San Francisco, State : CA Country : United States, 

[Lucy22434]

Lots of people haven't had many relationships at 15. I don't think you should worry about that. In fact, I would worry about you if at 15 you had a lot of relationships under your belt. You have lots of time to get into relationships with guys. I was one of those girls who started having boyfriends at about 13, and I can tell you that none of those relationships lasted, and they caused a bunch of heartache and drama that was not necessary. Looking back, I wish I would have spent more time hanging out with my girlfriends and just having a good time, rather than messing around with boyfriends. The relationships you would have with boyfriends at 15 are short-term at best, but if you build strong friendships with your girlfriends, those will probably last a lifetime. I have been out of high school for almost 10 years, and I still talk to my high school best friend at least once a month, and she lives 3,000 miles away.

My second point is that you should always be yourself and never alter your personality to attract people. This is the only way to ensure that your friends and boyfriends like you for who you are and not who you are pretending to be. And even if you don't have a lot of friends or boyfriends, the ones you have will be genuine. And, in my opinion, quality is more important than quantity in any relationship. If you want to change your appearance because it is something you want to do, that's what you should do. But I don't think you should dress in a way that makes you uncomfortable just because that's what you think other people want you to do.

User Detail :  

Name : Lucy22434, Gender : F, Race : Hispanic/Latino (may be any race), Age : 26, City : San Jose, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Engineer, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Rick29875]

Showing skin will definitely get you the attention of males. That's how we're wired. Whether it's the kind of attention you want is for you to decide. Perhaps you could find a way to dress that made you feel sexy and confident rather than exposed and vulnerable.

User Detail :  

Name : Rick29875, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, City : Springfield, State : OH Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[H21397]

Like other people have said already, yes you might more dates but do you really want to go out with a guy who is basically going out with your legs. My sister has a friend who is 15, and she wears the shortest skirts you have ever seen, and is presently going out with a 19 year old. Although she's really nice, she has a bad reputation in some circles at school, and I know some people who laugh at her behind her back for what she wears.

User Detail :  

Name : H21397, Gender : F, Religion : Atheist, Age : 16, City : Aberdeen, State : NA Country : United Kingdom, 

[Zoe24242]

Yeah, who doesn't love sexy clothing? What makes a girl hotter than a short skirt? Well, the girl herself. You can wear a gunny sack, and if you walk and act with confidence, THAT is what attracts others. Trust me. people, in gereral, would much rather talk to a person smiling and laughing and happy, even if they are wearing baggy sweatpants. Who wants to talk to the person with a sullen look on their face, even if they are wearing clothes that show a mile of skin and cost a fortune? not many, and do you want someone who just wants you for the outside?

User Detail :  

Name : Zoe24242, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Humanist, Age : 22, City : Detroit, State : MI Country : United States, Occupation : web site designer, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, 

[Mr. Bennet]

Well, six years after your question, you might have overcome that problem, but for the other girls out there, I write: just be yourself. You are shy, quiet, studious and normal looking? No problem with that. Being a nice person that compliments people, smiles and wears normal clothes, you will sooner or later find a nice guy to be with. I used to be like you - shy, quiet, studious and normal looking too. But as I grew up, I learned that social skills are important to good relating to people, so I did my best to improve my talking but not beyond the point it wasn't me anymore. And in order to compete with the other good-looking guys, I try to dress well (not expensive clothes, you can find nice ones for good prices everywhere - the trick is to learn how to best combine them to reflect you inner self). If you start using clothes you are not used to nor that are natural to your persona, you'll find yourself in awkward situations, not knowing how to deal with them, because it's not you! And the men you'd attract might be interested only in your looks, possibly not in you.

User Detail :  

Name : Mr. Bennet, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 25, City : BH, State : NA Country : Brazil, Occupation : Biologist, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

[GregN.]

Wearing a short skirt will get you more attention, but it probably won't be the kind of attention you want. While it may help attract some good guys, you will also no doubt attract some scum bags who just want to get you in the sack.

User Detail :  

Name : GregN., Gender : Male, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 21, City : Omaha, State : NE Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

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