[Rhiannon]

Recently an African-American woman asked on Y? Forum why other African-American women were rude to her. I have a similar question: why aren't other Jews nicer to me? I reclaimed the Jewish identity my parents abandoned during my childhood, and I've been eager to find warm-hearted Jews to welcome me home, so to speak. I haven't found much of this. An example: I rented a chuppah (a Jewish wedding canopy) at a Jewish store recently, and the clerks were totally abrupt and curt with me. They didn't want to chat with me about my wedding and brushed off my attempts at small talk. Same thing with the klezmer bands I've been talking to about playing at my wedding - they're almost rude to me. I've experienced this in other aspects of my life with Jews as well. Is it me? Is it just a Midwest thing?

User Detail :  

Name : Rhiannon, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Jewish, Age : 29, City : Eden Prairie, State : MN Country : United States, Occupation : Professor, Social class : Middle class, 

[Augustine23612]

I ran into much the same thing when I converted to Catholicism as a teenager. I think it runs something like this: the lifelong adherents of any 'heritage' religion (Judaism, Catholicism, Eastern Orthodoxy and possibly Anglicanism) don't want someone coming in and being more enthusiastic about the religion and culture than they are. To be blunt, it makes them look bad. Converts are fine as long as they just come in and keep their mouths shut. Incidentally, many converts to Catholicism gravitate toward the more conservative and traditional elements of the church, and this annoys the hell out of those lifelong Catholics who just want to 'fulfill their Sunday obligation' and receive the sacraments without being challenged to explore more fully what they profess to believe. When I was single, I heard 'you should be a priest' more times than I can remember; I think a lot of this was 'you're digging into this more deeply than a layperson should and it's making us lifelong Catholics uncomfortable.' You might be hitting some of the same nerves with your fellow Jews.

User Detail :  

Name : Augustine23612, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Catholic, Age : 40, City : Columbia, State : SC Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Sarah-Jayne28382]

I suspect the reason they treat you the way you describe is that they think you're just taking on some tokens of Jewish identity but not the whole thing. For example, you may not always eat kosher, etc. Could that be it? They might think it should be all or nothing.

User Detail :  

Name : Sarah-Jayne28382, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 24, City : Melbourne, State : NA Country : Australia, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Frank S.]

Maybe you're just too sensitive. I'm Jewish, and I run into rude people all the time. I don't even know what their ethnic backgorund is, but for sure if I know they're Jewish, it bothers me more because I am often judged as a Jew by other Jewish people's behavior.

User Detail :  

Name : Frank S., Gender : M, City : White Plains, State : NY Country : United States, Social class : Upper middle class, 

[Jenna31017]

I had this same problem before I converted from being Catholic to Muslim. I found Unity and Sisterhood.

User Detail :  

Name : Jenna31017, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Muslim, Age : 22, City : Savannah, State : GA Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 2 Years of College, 

[Observer]

I agree with you that some people may be too sensitive or insensitive, and that all kinds of people can be rude; and believe me, I have met and served them. I have worked in different parts of the city, where a particular ethnic group predominates. None of these factors (age, sex, religion, ethnicity, physical status, etc) really bother me. The one thing that bothers me is the arrogant behaviour shown by many people towards my entire staff in the supposedly Jewish communities. I have read about explanations that because many are rich and too successful that they can behave this way. I don't buy this excuse, because I know many others who don't behave this way. It appears to me, that these people don't seem to care that other people can be just as rich or successful as they are. The behavior I have witnessed is not just that of arrogance; it often borders hostility. I have had casual chats with other non-Jewish folks who work in the area, and realized that you don't need to look like a Nazi to be on the receiving end of such behavior. Of course, this may be a wrong assumption. In the end, I decided to do some more research, but failed to find any satisfactory explanations. I realize that Jewish people had suffered much throughout history. But, don't they know that not every group on this earth have perpetuated such crimes against them? Prior to working in the area, I had no knowledge of such a phenomenon, and my research did confirm that I am not uniquely sensitive. I have read on Y! Forum that being Jewish refers partly to identifying with The Book. But does The Book not teach much about 'proper' behavior? My intention is not to offend any one, but to merely seek an honest answer, as is stated in the Y! Forum's main page.

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Name : Observer, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Oriental, Age : 31, City : Toronto, State : NA Country : Canada, Occupation : Retail, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[EJ]

I'm upset for you that Jews have been unfriendly to you. I live in New York, and every time I visit a Jewish community in the Midwest, they are very warm. In fact, you can travel all over the world and call the local Chabad house, and they will take you into their home, find you a place to sleep and feed you as well, and those are Chasidic sects. And I just came back from Seattle where I had to turn down invitations from the synagogue members so I could spend time walking around the city. I'm so sorry you experienced bad things, but it's not true all over.

User Detail :  

Name : EJ, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Jewish, Age : 28, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, 

[Ron-F]

Think about it: How difficult it is for most people to be confimed into Judaism? Very difficult indeed! How do some Israelis make you feel in Israel? Very unwelcome indeed!How polite are some Jewish shopkeepers or taxi drivers in Manhattan? Not very I'm afraid ! I could go on and on and on...but then STOP I must: In every race/religion/group there are the rude ones, the unhelpful ones and those that just don't give a damn. I think you cannot hold Jews as a whole responsible for the way you are treated...maybe the people where you live in the Midwest are the way you say they are you should move!If you move to where I live there are the good ones and the bad ones also but they won't be based on your or their religion !

User Detail :  

Name : Ron-F, Gender : M, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Jewish, City : Bangkok, State : NA Country : Thailand, Occupation : Retired, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

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