[Deborah]

I want to know what people think about the 'down low phenomenon' that has been occurring recently in the African-American and Hispanic communities. I realize this is not a new phenomenon but it seems to have become much more prominent in the past couple of years. I saw a guy talk about it once on Oprah who said he was in the down low and had sex with other men yet he didn't think he was gay. Huh?? What's your guys' opinions?

User Detail :  

Name : Deborah, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 18, City : Matthews, State : NC Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class, 

[FreedaBee]

The way I've always understood it is that gayness is determined by the pitcher/catcher roles. Now, there are men in the gay communiity who are primarily pitchers; but they identify as gay and might be labeled as a to'. For the down-low guys, though, the only ones who are gay are the catchers. So, you can have sex with another guy, but as long as you're the pitcher, you're not gay because you're still in the dominant/male role. The catcher is gay because he's in the submissive/female role. It's the difference between doing and being done-to.

User Detail :  

Name : FreedaBee, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 39, City : Orange County, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Analyst, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

[Rachel28699]

That is the most ridiculous excuse I have ever heard. Isn't one who has sex (any kind, ie: oral, anal, giving or receiving,) with the same gender considered homosexual? Or bisexual at the very least? A few years back the New York Times Magazine ran a feature about black men (though I am sure black men are NOT the only ones) who are on the 'DL', going out there, having sex with other men and then returning to their heterosexual lives. What a load of crap! There's no shame in being gay but the stigma attached has some people ashamed of who and what they really are! The saddest thing that this article made clear was that some of these men are either in committed heterosexual relationships or are married men with children! Some of these men admitted to not having themselves tested for HIV/AIDS and then going home and having sex with their wives and/or girlfriends. I once knew a guy on the down low. He had a beautiful wife and a gorgeous 3 year old son. All three are dead now. Dead from AIDS-related illnesses. FreedaBee, if you know any brothers on the DL, you need to school them on how destructive and deadly this behavior is!

User Detail :  

Name : Rachel28699, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Buddhist, Age : 48, City : Sydney, State : NA Country : Australia, 

[Dennis]

I think that the reason that you are seeing so many "down-low" blacks is that the black race looks down on it. I know people look down on it in general, but when it comes to black men, manhood is very important, and it has been taken away from blacks in the past by racist whites. Black women usually will not deal with a man who sleeps with other men, so the men hide or lie. This is a deep issue, and it would take a long time to really get into it.

User Detail :  

Name : Dennis, Gender : M, Race : Black/African American, Age : 28, City : New York, State : NY Country : United States, 

[FreedaBee]

I'm with you 100% on this one, Rachel. I'd actually heard the pitcher/catcher thing from a Hispanic woman about her ex-(pitcher) husband, but she said it also applied to a lot of men in the Black community. I also once worked in a drug rehab when a number of the staff were also recovering addicts and some had done prison time because of their drug use. One of the male counselors admitted to having sex with oher men in prison but said he didn't consider it homosexual behavior because a) there weren't any women around to have sex with and, b) he was the 'pitcher and not the catcher.' I told him that, in my opinion, whether he was the 'pitcher' or the 'catcher' he was still playing 'baseball' all the same!

User Detail :  

Name : FreedaBee, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 42, City : Orange County, State : CA Country : United States, Occupation : Analyst, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class, 

[ShellyStrauss Rollison]

I know that's probably the most accepted definition of orientation, but if you think about it, there are millions of gays all over the world married to the "opposite" gender because they're afraid to come out of the closet for fear of what may happen. They're having sex with their spouses, but that doesn't change the fact that they're gay. I wrote an article called "Redefining Orientation". If you google that title, with quotes, you'll find it on the first page of Googles search engine. It might help you better understand the issue. Love and Light

User Detail :  

Name : ShellyStrauss Rollison, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : New Age/Metaphysical, Age : 49, City : New Alexandria, State : PA Country : United States, Occupation : Minister, writer, activist, CNA, draftsman, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 

[ShellyStrauss Rollison]

Who you have sex with has nothing to do with your orienation. That's a "radical" notion to may people, but if you think about it, there are millions of gays (male and female) all over the world who are married to the "opposite" gender and have sex with their spouses. That doesn't make them straight any more than a man having sex with another man makes him gay. I'm not saying that all men on the down low are straight-- some of them very well may be gay and just too afraid to come out of the closet. But some of them may be straight and simply have a fetish for sex with another man, not much different than someone with a fetish for hairy men or women with large butts. Love and Light

User Detail :  

Name : ShellyStrauss Rollison, Gender : Female, Sexual Orientation : Bisexual, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : New Age/Metaphysical, Age : 49, City : New Alexandria, State : PA Country : United States, Occupation : Minister, writer, activist, CNA, draftsman, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 

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