[Paula]

Why do some black people feel it is OK to be rude to another person if the other person is white?

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Name : Paula, Gender : F, Age : 31, City : Texarkana, State : AR Country : United States, Occupation : Student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[RG30163]

I think some black people, particularly young black people, are rude to whites just because they can be. They know the history, i.e. they know that there was a time when a black person could be lynched for even looking at a white person. Or, it could be their way of showing their dislike/mistrust of white people in general. Or perhaps, and this is my personal theory, they just don't have any home training!

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Name : RG30163, Gender : F, Race : Black/African American, Age : 27, City : Richmond, State : VA Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, 

[Tony]

How is it that you know the motivation of the person that is rude to you? Maybe that person is rude to everyone. It works both ways; if I am treated badly by a salesperson or someone treats me rudely, I do not automatically assume it's because I'm black or gay, or bald or attractive. My first inclination is to think "what's his/her problem?"

Recently at a dinner party I took part in a conversation about young Latino, Filipino and African-American kids and how loud and obnoxious they are on the Metro (subway) and how loudly they play their music. I was in a room of professional adults who seemed absolutely powerless over these teenage kids. I told them that if I'm on the Metro and anyone, not just kids, is being rude, I ask them to be quiet or whatever. The non-whites in the discussion said they couldn't say anything to non-white kids because they were either afraid of the kids or afraid of being called racists. I think that's ridiculous.

I also think these kids know that people believe the media's portrayal of them, and they are taking advantage of it. The moral of this story is, don't let the color of a kid (or anyone else) prevent you from speaking up if you think you're being treated rudely.

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Name : Tony, City : San Francisco, State : CA Country : United States, 

[Roberta G.]

Having worked with the public as a cashier in a department store as well as several other capacities, I understand your question. I have worked with, and waited on, people of every possible description. It would be easy to generalize and say that one ethnic group is ruder than another, but my practical experience says otherwise. Some of the nicest customers I had were black, and some of the meanest were whiter than I am. However, a few of my co-workers, black and Hispanic, were frequently very rude to me. All of them were under 25, and in time I noticed the same arrogant attitude was often dispensed by some of my younger white co-workers as well, and not just toward myself. They would be snotty toward anyone who wasn't a customer and didn't outrank them. It seems some people learn compassion and manners only as they grow older and figure out that people who do not look like themselves are still human beings. And some people are just plain rude. Anyone who doesn't believe that has never worked in retail. I should add that my supervisor was black and one of the warmest, most understanding persons I have ever met and I still keep in touch with her.

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Name : Roberta G., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 38, City : Stafford, State : VA Country : United States, Occupation : Formerly cashier, now homemaker, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Diane]

Why are racists rude to people they're prejudiced against? Because they are ill-mannered SOB's, of course. In asking the question, you pre-suppose there is an explanation, and there is none. Don't try to find logic in their actions. Racism is never logical.

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Name : Diane, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Agnostic, Age : 45, City : Durham, State : NC Country : United States, Occupation : Teacher, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 

[Kurt26144]

I get the general impression from my black friends that they approach life with the attitude that everyone is going to be biased against them because the color of their skin anyway, so to hell with them if people don't like who they are. Therefore, they act "rude" as a form of defense, which has two benefits: 1) Openly racist whites think twice before offending them. 2) Subconsciously racist whites, who hold blacks to stereotypes but don't vocalize them, will treat them with kid-gloves.

My recommendation is stand up for yourself and be proud of your white ancestry; just as they're proud to be black. You don't have to be "rude" back, just don't allow blacks to hypocritically openly discriminate against you because you're white. Demand the same respect of them that they demand of you. And of course, the same goes for all other races as well.

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Name : Kurt26144, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Pagan, Age : 29, City : Boulder, State : CO Country : United States, Occupation : Senior Market Research Analyst, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[John K.]

Kurt: If blacks act 'rude' towards whites, then this will somehow make white racists think twice...that seems wrong to me. Just from common sense, it would seem that 'rude' behavior by blacks would simply fuel the racist fire, by providing the racists with more examples to justify their point of view. That trend certainly applies in this part of the country. The racists use the 'bad attitude' of some nonwhites to justify their beliefs. So I do not understand how your methods could work.

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Name : John K., Gender : M, Age : 26, City : Cranford, State : NJ Country : United States, Occupation : Chemical Engineer, Education level : Over 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Wallace]

Kurt, you make the point to stand up for yourself and to be openly proud of your white ancestry the same way young blacks are proud of theirs. How I wish it were that easy, my friend! Where I am from (Atlanta, Ga.), I have practically grown up hearing from the time I was cognizant that whites have committed great sins across the whole world and to feel bad for past injustices. To even speak the words "white pride" means de facto racism to many people, and not all of them are hypersensitive young blacks with a bone to pick with the world. I honestly feel that many white people would rather avoid the situation all together or just silently take the verbal abuse by the perpetrators lest they be called racist. Whether we like it or not, this fact that whites cannot openly voice an opinion that blacks may find contrary without the race specter being thrown into the mix is a sad reality.

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Name : Wallace, Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Christian, Age : 24, City : Miyazaki, State : NA Country : Japan, Occupation : Teacher, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[Sharon28099]

For the same reason white people feel it's OK to be rude to black people. It's wrong. People all have the same organs, bones and muscles, just a different skin color.

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Name : Sharon28099, Gender : F, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Lutheran, Age : 27, City : Ann Arbor, State : MI Country : United States, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[MB-Billinghurst]

Consider that it might be because whites are often rude to blacks. Sometimes it is not malicious; it is just that to many whites (not even racist whites), we are invisible. They walk up to a customer service counter in front of others. They bring their dogs over to your lawn to pee. They ask the other white person if they need help in a store, overlooking blacks. It goes on and on. Sometimes you just get tired, and the next white person who happens to be rude to you or appears to be rude gets it.

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Name : MB-Billinghurst, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Pagan, Age : 41, City : Littleton, State : CO Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, 

[John A.]

I don't want to treat anybody rudely, just as I don't like being treatd rudely. But let's face it, there has to be a way to deal with people who treat us like filth other than to respond in an obsequious manner. I don't believe in using violence, and I have never attacked anybody. I certainly don't walk around hoping to assault the first African-American male who looks at me askance. In truth, I am far more guilty of backing down on those few occasions when poorly treated by a black person than of overreacting to such outrageous behavior with anything remotely resembling verbal or physical assault. I simply maintain that there is a small core of African Americans who see the average white man as weak and unmanly, and in dealing with such people, politeness just isn't the way to go: What is the proper response? I honestly don't know.

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Name : John A., Gender : M, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 41, City : Boston, State : MA Country : United States, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Lower middle class, 

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